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He's not a one-armed rower. That is not factually accurate
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Jack Whitehall: Settle Down

He's not a one-armed rower.That is not factually accurate

He's not a one-armed rower.
That is not factually accurate

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:04.056
He's not a one-armed rower. That is not factually accurate.
Duration
6 seconds
Views
33
Timestamp in Movie
00:07:29
Uploaded
Apr 09, 2025
Genres
documentary, comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

Jack Whitehall takes the stage at London's O2 Arena to riff on dogs, drinking, dining alone, and finally deciding to settle down and become a father.
This is something that I've talked about, this slight to my wafer-thin ego. - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:06
This is something that I've talked about, this slight t...
I have complained about the fact that my school have no pride in me - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:08
I have complained about the fact that my school have no prid...
Be very careful what you wish for. - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:05
Be very careful what you wish for.
Six months ago, there was a story about my school. - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:05
Six months ago, there was a story about my school.
It was about a teacher that had been arrested - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:08
It was about a teacher that had been arrested
Newspaper headline, - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:12
Newspaper headline,
This guy wasn't even a teacher when I was there. - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:05
This guy wasn't even a teacher when I was there.
Scroll down and there's Professor Noncey-Bollocks, - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:08
Scroll down and there's Professor Noncey-Bollocks,
That is the worst photo that's ever been taken of me. - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:05
That is the worst photo that's ever been taken of me.
That photo is so unattractive, - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:08
That photo is so unattractive,
And they really felt the need as well to do me dirty in the caption. Yeah. - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:06
And they really felt the need as well to do me dirty in the ...
Really. They felt it was necessary to point out that of these two images, - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:09
Really. They felt it was necessary to point out that of thes...
The weirdest reaction to this story, hands down, was my mother's. Okay? - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:06
The weirdest reaction to this story, hands down, was my moth...
I saw my mum about a week after this article had been printed. - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:05
I saw my mum about a week after this article had been printe...
Went to her house, she's in the kitchen, big shit-eating grin on her face. - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:06
Went to her house, she's in the kitchen, big shit-eatin...
She was like, "I saw you in the newspaper." - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:23
She was like, "I saw you in the newspaper."
The final kick in the bollocks came when I read the main body of the article, - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:07
The final kick in the bollocks came when I read the main bod...
I took it down off my mum's fridge, and I'm gonna read you this short extract. - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:06
I took it down off my mum's fridge, and I'm gonna ...
Now bearing in mind I've already got issues with my billing - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:10
Now bearing in mind I've already got issues with my bil...
'Cause I wasn't the only famous former pupil - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:07
'Cause I wasn't the only famous former pupil