To watch in HD, get ClipCafe PRO
I was like,
Please log in to add to collections.
Jack Whitehall: Settle Down

I was like, "I know what I need to do.I need to take myself for a nice meal." "I'm gonna...

I was like, "I know what I need to do.
I need to take myself for a nice meal." "I'm gonna wine and dine myself." So I go to a restaurant, and I don't mind
eating on my own in a restaurant, but I do like there to be
a degree of discretion when I do so

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:04.016
I was like, "I know what I need to do. I need to take myself for a nice meal."
00:00:04.024 --> 00:00:06.002
"I'm gonna wine and dine myself."
00:00:06.028 --> 00:00:09.092
So I go to a restaurant, and I don't mind eating on my own in a restaurant,
00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:13.008
but I do like there to be a degree of discretion when I do so.
Duration
14 seconds
Views
30
Timestamp in Movie
00:56:58
Uploaded
Apr 09, 2025
Genres
documentary, comedy
Production
N/A

Want This Clip in HD?

Upgrade for HD/4K downloads and unlimited access. Upgrade now →

Movie Summary

Jack Whitehall takes the stage at London's O2 Arena to riff on dogs, drinking, dining alone, and finally deciding to settle down and become a father.
I always approach eating on my own in a restaurant like I approach sex. - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:06
I always approach eating on my own in a restaurant like I ap...
In and out as quickly as possible, - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:09
In and out as quickly as possible,
I whisper my name, whisper my name to this hostess, - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:16
I whisper my name, whisper my name to this hostess,
She walks out, she goes, - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:11
She walks out, she goes,
That is the most depressing description of my lunch - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:08
That is the most depressing description of my lunch
And now everyone in the restaurant is looking over to see - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:07
And now everyone in the restaurant is looking over to see
I have to do the walk of shame through the restaurant. - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:05
I have to do the walk of shame through the restaurant.
Why do waitresses feel the need to do this if you're eating on your own? - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:06
Why do waitresses feel the need to do this if you're ea...
She comes over to my table and makes a big song and dance - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:08
She comes over to my table and makes a big song and dance
As if to say, "We wouldn't want anyone looking over here - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:36
As if to say, "We wouldn't want anyone looking ove...
"Does sir have any allergies today, or should I just put 'people'?" - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:10
"Does sir have any allergies today, or should I just pu...
"Would you like bottled water or tap?" - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:10
"Would you like bottled water or tap?"
All water has technically come through a tap at some point, - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:07
All water has technically come through a tap at some point,
This waitress wasn't out in a field this morning, - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:08
This waitress wasn't out in a field this morning,
No, but they say "tap" because words have power, - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:12
No, but they say "tap" because words have power,
The waitress walking out there with a mangy pail of water - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:12
The waitress walking out there with a mangy pail of water
Maybe I have quite a vivid imagination, but you get the point. - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:06
Maybe I have quite a vivid imagination, but you get the poin...
She's back with the menus. By this point, I thought she was taking the piss. - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:06
She's back with the menus. By this point, I thought she...
She's like, "Right, well, we serve things in this menu family-style." - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:33
She's like, "Right, well, we serve things in this ...
I was like, "Oh, madam." - Jack Whitehall: Settle Down 00:14
I was like, "Oh, madam."