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Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill

"Text it! Text!" "Don't... I don't...I don't know where it is

"Text it! Text!" "Don't... I don't...
I don't know where it is

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.294
"Text it! Text!"
00:00:03.067 --> 00:00:05.588
"Don't... I don't... I don't know where it is.
Duration
6 seconds
Views
35
Timestamp in Movie
00:19:21
Uploaded
Jun 01, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

Comedian Jerry Seinfeld performs at the Beacon Theatre in New York City with his take on everyday life, uncovering comedy in the commonplace.
Don't tell me! Text it. Don't tell me!" - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:08
Don't tell me! Text it. Don't tell me!"
"Want some human contact but kind of had it up to here with people? - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:04
"Want some human contact but kind of had it up to here ...
Need to get someone some information - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:06
Need to get someone some information
You need to be on text." - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:06
You need to be on text."
Now, instead of "OK," a lot of people text me just the "K," - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:06
Now, instead of "OK," a lot of people text me just...
What... what microfraction of a second did you save? - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:05
What... what microfraction of a second did you save?
What does that add up to, - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:08
What does that add up to,
Somebody texted me "TY" the other day instead of "thank you." - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:07
Somebody texted me "TY" the other day instead of &...
We're so anxious to get the next text, - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:05
We're so anxious to get the next text,
"Oh, we're cooking up a good one for you. Wait till ya see this. - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:04
"Oh, we're cooking up a good one for you. Wait til...
You are not gonna believe what this guy's about to say." - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:07
You are not gonna believe what this guy's about to say....
We're still working on it in the text machine, - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:05
We're still working on it in the text machine,
Why are people on voice mail still telling me to wait for the beep? - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:04
Why are people on voice mail still telling me to wait for th...
The Maasai tribesmen of the African plain know about the beep. - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:05
The Maasai tribesmen of the African plain know about the bee...
Beep!" - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:09
Beep!"
Anyone getting messages like, "This is a woman. Goodbye"? - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:05
Anyone getting messages like, "This is a woman. Goodbye...
I always wonder if they... Before they do those kinds of things, - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:08
I always wonder if they... Before they do those kinds of thi...
You don't think this one feature, - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:13
You don't think this one feature,
You don't think that could happen from this one thing?" - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:06
You don't think that could happen from this one thing?&...
Nor do I think every restaurant dinner will end with a picture bully going, - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:07
Nor do I think every restaurant dinner will end with a pictu...