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Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill

You're playing paintball war; I'm in Afghanistanwith real, loaded weapons

You're playing paintball war; I'm in Afghanistan
with real, loaded weapons

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:02.459
You're playing paintball war;
00:00:02.543 --> 00:00:04.878
I'm in Afghanistan with real, loaded weapons.
Duration
5 seconds
Views
32
Timestamp in Movie
00:35:13
Uploaded
Jun 01, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

Comedian Jerry Seinfeld performs at the Beacon Theatre in New York City with his take on everyday life, uncovering comedy in the commonplace.
Married guys play with full clips and live rounds. - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:05
Married guys play with full clips and live rounds.
Single guy's sitting on a merry-go-round, blowin' on a pinwheel! - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:04
Single guy's sitting on a merry-go-round, blowin' ...
You single guys here tonight, looking at me, - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:05
You single guys here tonight, looking at me,
What do I gotta have if I wanna be a married guy?" - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:06
What do I gotta have if I wanna be a married guy?"
Their brains are strong, - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:05
Their brains are strong,
The female brain is one of the most competent - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:06
The female brain is one of the most competent
It will solve all problems of earth - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:06
It will solve all problems of earth
Having completed that, - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:05
Having completed that,
The female needs to know how you might respond. - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:06
The female needs to know how you might respond.
"If you faked your own death, and I found out about it, - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:06
"If you faked your own death, and I found out about it,
"What are we talkin' about now?" - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:08
"What are we talkin' about now?"
Being married is like being on a game show, - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:05
Being married is like being on a game show,
I went out and bought a game-show podium. I set it up in my living room. - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:04
I went out and bought a game-show podium. I set it up in my ...
I wake up in the morning, and I stand behind the podium, - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:08
I wake up in the morning, and I stand behind the podium,
"I'll take 'Movies I Think We Saw Together' for 200." - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:10
"I'll take 'Movies I Think We Saw Together�...
"I'll take 'Details of a Ten-Minute Conversation - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:06
"I'll take 'Details of a Ten-Minute Conversat...
I'm going for the win right here." - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:06
I'm going for the win right here."
"I'm sorry, sir. You did not win the weekend sex package... - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:04
"I'm sorry, sir. You did not win the weekend sex p...
Thank you for playing. Are you even listening to me? - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:04
Thank you for playing. Are you even listening to me?
One of the things I did not know before I got married - Jerry Seinfeld: 23 Hours to Kill 00:10
One of the things I did not know before I got married