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And this man walked right by everyone, and he sat down next
to an attractive woman. And I was so impressed. That woman could look beyond this man's
appearance and focus solely on his wallet. Whoo! But we all wanna be good-looking, right? We all wanna be chased
on the playground, right? Some people go so far
as to get plastic surgery. They're like,
"Oh, I don't wanna sound desperate, but can you take a knife to my face?" "And make me pretty.
Just keep cutting!"
to an attractive woman. And I was so impressed. That woman could look beyond this man's
appearance and focus solely on his wallet. Whoo! But we all wanna be good-looking, right? We all wanna be chased
on the playground, right? Some people go so far
as to get plastic surgery. They're like,
"Oh, I don't wanna sound desperate, but can you take a knife to my face?" "And make me pretty.
Just keep cutting!"
Full Transcript
00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:02.875
And this man walked right by everyone,
00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:05.385
and he sat down next
to an attractive woman.
00:00:05.051 --> 00:00:06.505
And I was so impressed.
00:00:06.063 --> 00:00:12.076
That woman could look beyond this man's
appearance and focus solely on his wallet.
00:00:14.043 --> 00:00:16.031
Whoo!
00:00:17.031 --> 00:00:19.355
But we all wanna be good-looking, right?
00:00:19.048 --> 00:00:21.645
We all wanna be chased
on the playground, right?
00:00:21.077 --> 00:00:24.855
Some people go so far
as to get plastic surgery.
00:00:24.098 --> 00:00:27.155
They're like,
"Oh, I don't wanna sound desperate,
00:00:27.028 --> 00:00:29.002
but can you take a knife to my face?"
00:00:30.041 --> 00:00:32.099
"And make me pretty.
Just keep cutting!"
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Movie Summary
Stand-up special by Jim Gaffigan.