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Jim Jefferies: This Is Me Now

Now... this wasn't like... like I woke up with cramps and went... And then I shit the bed....

Now... this wasn't like... like I woke up with cramps and went... And then I shit the bed. No, the shit and the waking up
was a simultaneous thing. I was lying there, and went

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:02.000
Now...
00:00:03.294 --> 00:00:04.545
this wasn't like...
00:00:05.171 --> 00:00:08.466
like I woke up with cramps and went...
00:00:08.549 --> 00:00:09.801
And then I shit the bed.
00:00:09.884 --> 00:00:12.804
No, the shit and the waking up was a simultaneous thing.
00:00:14.097 --> 00:00:15.348
I was lying there, and went...
Duration
15 seconds
Views
37
Timestamp in Movie
00:43:52
Uploaded
Jun 29, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
Irwin Entertainment

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Movie Summary

The gleefully irreverent Jefferies skewers "grabby" celebrities, political hypocrisy and his own ill-advised career moves in a brash stand-up special.
He's fast asleep, - Jim Jefferies: This Is Me Now 00:38
He's fast asleep,
Now, I'm there for a couple of hours. - Jim Jefferies: This Is Me Now 00:27
Now, I'm there for a couple of hours.
He walks in to see his father shitting and vomiting on the toilet. - Jim Jefferies: This Is Me Now 00:08
He walks in to see his father shitting and vomiting on the t...
I'm gonna tell you a story. - Jim Jefferies: This Is Me Now 00:29
I'm gonna tell you a story.
So it's... Mariah Carey. Now... - Jim Jefferies: This Is Me Now 00:35
So it's... Mariah Carey. Now...
So they ring back and they go... Her fiance at the time... - Jim Jefferies: This Is Me Now 00:33
So they ring back and they go... Her fiance at the time...
So they ring me up, and they go... - Jim Jefferies: This Is Me Now 00:39
So they ring me up, and they go...
They rang back, "$60,000, 12 minutes," - Jim Jefferies: This Is Me Now 00:48
They rang back, "$60,000, 12 minutes,"
Then he points at me, he goes, "I know you. - Jim Jefferies: This Is Me Now 00:24
Then he points at me, he goes, "I know you.
So I just break out into a fucking sweat, right? - Jim Jefferies: This Is Me Now 00:40
So I just break out into a fucking sweat, right?
I just look like a guy who's gotten onto the property... - Jim Jefferies: This Is Me Now 00:10
I just look like a guy who's gotten onto the property.....
And I went, "Fuck it! - Jim Jefferies: This Is Me Now 00:30
And I went, "Fuck it!
And he just chats to the table for three minutes. - Jim Jefferies: This Is Me Now 00:08
And he just chats to the table for three minutes.
After three minutes, he doesn't even look at me. - Jim Jefferies: This Is Me Now 00:10
After three minutes, he doesn't even look at me.
Then Leonardo DiCaprio took the women over, - Jim Jefferies: This Is Me Now 00:48
Then Leonardo DiCaprio took the women over,
So I keep going, and he's getting angrier and angrier, - Jim Jefferies: This Is Me Now 00:06
So I keep going, and he's getting angrier and angrier,
"Gun control!" - Jim Jefferies: This Is Me Now 00:44
"Gun control!"
I did get a laugh, though. - Jim Jefferies: This Is Me Now 00:31
I did get a laugh, though.
And then he just went... - Jim Jefferies: This Is Me Now 00:21
And then he just went...
So I finish up the show and I did a routine that was on my last special - Jim Jefferies: This Is Me Now 00:13
So I finish up the show and I did a routine that was on my l...