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Can you keep this fucking thing straight?

Can you keepthis fucking thing straight? No, I can't keep it straight. When the road...

Landman • S02E03 • 2024

Can you keepthis fucking thing straight? No, I can't keep it straight. When the road curves,I have to curve with it. If you thinkthis interstate's bumpy, how about I run us out over thatcow pasture there at about 80? Well, then slow down until I getmy fucking makeup done. If you hadn't rushed meout of the house... Sweetheart, I didn't evenask you to come, remember? Well, our new houseain't gonna find itself. All right?We're meeting Stephen at noon. No, you're meeting Stephenat noon. I got business. That's the reason we're goingup here to start with. Grumpy dog. Who pissedin your Cheerios today? Life, that's who. Life pulled out its big dick andbeat me over the head with it

Full Transcript

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Can you keep this fucking thing straight

00:00:02.835 --> 00:00:04.136

No I can't keep it straight

00:00:04.027 --> 00:00:06.372

When the road curves I have to curve with it

00:00:06.472 --> 00:00:08.107

If you think this interstate's bumpy

00:00:08.207 --> 00:00:10.943

how about I run us out over that cow pasture there at about 80

00:00:11.998 --> 00:00:12.244

Well then slow down

00:00:12.312 --> 00:00:13.746

until I get my fucking makeup done

00:00:13.813 --> 00:00:15.315

If you hadn't rushed me out of the house

00:00:15.415 --> 00:00:18.015

Sweetheart I didn't even ask you to come remember

00:00:18.025 --> 00:00:20.453

Well our new house ain't gonna find itself

00:00:20.052 --> 00:00:22.288

All right We're meeting Stephen at noon

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No you're meeting Stephen at noon I got business

00:00:24.457 --> 00:00:26.592

That's the reason we're going up here to start with

00:00:26.659 --> 00:00:28.994

Grumpy dog Who pissed in your Cheerios today

00:00:29.128 --> 00:00:30.663

Life that's who

00:00:30.763 --> 00:00:34.334

Life pulled out its big dick and beat me over the head with it

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:02.459

Tu peux rouler droit

00:00:02.543 --> 00:00:04.211

Non je peux pas

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Si la route tourne je tourne

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Si tu trouves que ça secoue

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attends que je roule dans le champ à 100 à l'heure

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Ralentis au moins le temps que je me maquille

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Tu m'as fait sortir en vitesse

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Je t'ai même pas demandé de venir

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Il faut bien qu'on se trouve une maison

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On voit Stephen à midi

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Tu vois Stephen à midi

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J'ai du boulot C'est pour ça qu'on est là

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T'es grognon

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Qui a pissé dans tes céréales La vie

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La vie a dégainé sa grosse bite et m'a tabassé avec

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Vuoi tenere dritto questo coso

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Non posso tenerlo dritto Quando la strada curva devo curvare

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Se questa ti sembra accidentata

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proviamo quel pascolo di mucche a 130

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Allora rallenta cazzo mentre finisco di truccarmi

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Mi hai fatto uscire di corsa Tesoro

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non ti ho nemmeno chiesto di venire ricordi

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La nostra casa nuova non si troverà da sola

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Vediamo Stephen a mezzogiorno Tu vedi Stephen a mezzogiorno

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Io ho degli affari ed è il motivo per cui andiamo lì

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Cane scontroso chi ti ha pisciato nei cereali

00:00:29.032 --> 00:00:30.446

La vita ecco chi

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Ha tirato fuori il suo pisellone e me l'ha sbattuto in faccia

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Puedes mantener esta maldita cosa en orden

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No no puedo mantenerlo claro

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Cuando el camino se curva Tengo que curvarme con eso

00:00:06.472 --> 00:00:08.107

Si crees que esta interestatal está llena de baches qué

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tal si nos llevamos por ese pasto para vacas a eso de los 80

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Bueno entonces baja el

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ritmo hasta que me maquille

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Si no me hubieras sacado corriendo de la casa

00:00:15.415 --> 00:00:18.015

Cariño ni siquiera te pedí que vinieras recuerdas

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Bueno nuestra nueva casa no se encontrará sola

00:00:20.052 --> 00:00:22.288

Está bien Nos reuniremos con Stephen al mediodía

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No te reunirás con Stephen al mediodía Tengo negocios

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Ésa es la razón por la que subimos aquí para empezar

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Perro gruñón Quién orinó en tus Cheerios hoy

00:00:29.128 --> 00:00:30.663

La vida ese es quién

00:00:30.763 --> 00:00:34.334

La vida sacó su gran polla y me golpeó en la cabeza con ella

Available in 4 languages

Duration

36 seconds

Views

28

Timestamp in Movie

00:04:03

Uploaded

Feb 03, 2026

Season

2

Episode

3

Genres

Production

Bosque Ranch Productions,101 Studios,MTV Entertainment Studios,Texas Monthly,Imperative Entertainment

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Movie Summary

A modern-day tale of fortune seeking in the world of West Texas oil rigs.