To watch in HD, get ClipCafe PRO
Guard Nail him up I sayGuard Nail some sense into him
Please log in to add to collections.
Life of Brian

Nail them up I say! Nail some sense into them!

Ben the Prisoner:Nail them up I say! Nail some sense into them!

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.092
Guard Nail him up I say
00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:07.009
Guard Nail some sense into him
Available in 6 languages
Duration
8 seconds
Views
1,076
Timestamp in Movie
00:37:03
Uploaded
Mar 09, 2026
Genres
comedy
Production
Handmade Films,Python (Monty) Pictures Limited

Want This Clip in HD?

Upgrade for HD/4K downloads and unlimited access. Upgrade now →

Movie Summary

Born on the original Christmas in the stable next door to Jesus Christ, Brian of Nazareth spends his life being mistaken for a messiah.
Now take my case. - Life of Brian 00:50
Now take my case.
Stwike him centurion very woughly - Life of Brian 00:04
Stwike him centurion very woughly
So your father was a Woman Who was heHe was a centurion in the Jerusalem garrison sirReally What was his nameNaughtius MaximusCenturion do you have anyone of that name in the garrisonWell no sirWell you sound very sure Have you checkedWell no sir I think - Life of Brian 02:52
So your father was a Woman Who was heHe was a centurion in...
Centurion, do you have anyone of that name in the garrison? - Life of Brian 01:00
Centurion, do you have anyone of that name in the garrison?
I will not have my friends "widiculed" by the common "soldiewy." Anyone else feel like a little giggle... - Life of Brian 00:41
I will not have my friends "widiculed" by the...
He has a wife, you know? - Life of Brian 00:33
He has a wife, you know?
And the bezan shall be huge and blackAnd the eyes thereof red with the blood of living creaturesAnd the whore of Babylonshall ride forth on a threeheaded serpentAnd throughout the lands there'll be a great rubbing of partsThe demon shall bear a ninebladed - Life of Brian 01:17
And the bezan shall be huge and blackAnd the eyes thereof...
There shall in that time be rumors of things going astrayum and there shall be a great confusion as to where things really areAnd nobody will really know where lieththose little thingswith the sort of raffia work base that has an attachmentAt this time a - Life of Brian 00:36
There shall in that time be rumors of things going astrayum...
You're supposed to argue Ten for that You must be mad - Life of Brian 00:06
You're supposed to argue Ten for that You must be mad
One total catastrophe like thisis just the beginning - Life of Brian 00:07
One total catastrophe like thisis just the beginning
Hello? Matthias? - Reg? - Go away. Reg, it's me, Brian. Get off! Get off out of it! - Stan! - Piss o - Life of Brian 00:26
Hello? Matthias? - Reg? - Go away. Reg, it's me, Brian....
Yea, verily at that time it is written in the book of Obadiah, a man shall strike his donkey and his nephew's donkey. - Life of Brian 00:40
Yea, verily at that time it is written in the book of...
Quiet Silly person - Life of Brian 00:04
Quiet Silly person
You know the penalty laid down by Roman lawfor harboring a known criminalNo CrucifixionOhNasty eh Could be worseWhat do you mean Could be worseWell you could be stabbedStabbed Takes a second Crucifixion lasts hoursIt's a slow horrible deathWell at least - Life of Brian 00:32
You know the penalty laid down by Roman lawfor harboring a...
No, sir. - Life of Brian 00:18
No, sir.
I'm sorry, Reg. - Life of Brian 00:20
I'm sorry, Reg.
My legs are old and bentMy ears are grizzled YesThere's one place we didn't look GuardsI'm just a poor old manMy nose is knackeredHave you ever seen anyone crucifiedCrucifixion's a doddleDon't keep saying thatFound this spoon sirWell done sergeantWe'll be - Life of Brian 00:38
My legs are old and bentMy ears are grizzled YesThere's...
Crucifixion's a doddleDon't keep saying that - Life of Brian 00:06
Crucifixion's a doddleDon't keep saying that
Found this spoon, sir. - Life of Brian 00:18
Found this spoon, sir.
Found this spoon, sir. - Life of Brian 00:11
Found this spoon, sir.