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Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

Louis C.K. recorded live on January 28, 2023 at Madison Square Garden in New York City.

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Louis C.K.

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Explore 452 Clips

It's not high enough to brag about. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

It's not high enough to brag about.

That means 8% of their clothes are like, you don't even want to know how we made this crap. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

That means 8% of their clothes are like, you don't even...

It was a bloodbath. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

It was a bloodbath.

We made this shirt, we just ripped the back off the Honduran kid who worked there. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

We made this shirt, we just ripped the back off the Honduran...

There are none here. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

There are none here.

Even with a ticket, he can't get in. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

Even with a ticket, he can't get in.

This is the part we all agree with. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

This is the part we all agree with.

I don't know what to do with the homeless, but they don't come here. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

I don't know what to do with the homeless, but they...

If you don't have your own interior, you can't enter the interior of others. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

If you don't have your own interior, you can't...

I've done charity shows like Les enfoirés
for the homeless or - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

I've done charity shows like Les enfoirés for the homel...

There are whole places they don't go, like the airport. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

There are whole places they don't go, like the airport.

You've never been to your gate and a guy says, hey, I'm trying to get to Tokyo. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

You've never been to your gate and a guy says, hey,...

Can you help me? - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

Can you help me?

From Phoenix, Arizona, 45 degrees. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

From Phoenix, Arizona, 45 degrees.

The homeless stand just outside at intersections with a sign that says, help me, - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

The homeless stand just outside at intersections with a sign...

You're in a white BMW like, sorry, I can't. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

You're in a white BMW like, sorry, I can't.

I don't know how to help you. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

I don't know how to help you.

You go through them and you have to
to make choices because you - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

You go through them and you have to to make choices because ...

So you choose who to lie to. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

So you choose who to lie to.

I don't, no, I don't know anything in any of my, I'm sorry. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

I don't, no, I don't know anything in any of my,...

Like there's this homeless guy
who lives, I mean, he doesn't live - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

Like there's this homeless guy who lives, I mean, he do...

But we often see him around the corner. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

But we often see him around the corner.

And I walk past him every day, every day, because I go to the same store every day. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

And I walk past him every day, every day, because I go to...

I go there every morning, buy a handful of rhinestone earrings and go home. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

I go there every morning, buy a handful of rhinestone...

Anyway, I walk past this
past this homeless man and all - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

Anyway, I walk past this past this homeless man and all

And then on the way home,
like 20 minutes later, - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

And then on the way home, like 20 minutes later,

But I do NOT want to give him another five dollars, you know, because I only have a few million. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

But I do NOT want to give him another five dollars, you...

I don't know what makes me say, hmm, you've already had your five dollars, young man. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

I don't know what makes me say, hmm, you've...

And I should really spoil him? - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

And I should really spoil him?

Give him the fucking money. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

Give him the fucking money.

Anyway, let me tell you a bit about my life. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

Anyway, let me tell you a bit about my life.

I was raised in an orphanage about a block from my parents' house. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

I was raised in an orphanage about a block from my...

And this is a joke, but my father, for real, my father is Mexican. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

And this is a joke, but my father, for real, my father is...

And hey, Mexicans, you're not supposed to be here. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

And hey, Mexicans, you're not supposed to be here.

Well yeah, I'm not going to rat you out, everything's going to be fine... - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

Well yeah, I'm not going to rat you out,...

OK - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

So I'm half dead on my father's side. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

So I'm half dead on my father's side.

And when I tell them I'm Mexican
Mexican, they say things - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

And when I tell them I'm Mexican Mexican, they say thin...

What do you mean by "how? - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

What do you mean by "how?

I'm not Mexican. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

I'm not Mexican.

Then I'm going home, señor. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

Then I'm going home, señor.

My parents divorced when I was about 10. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

My parents divorced when I was about 10.

And now I have two children and their parents are also divorced, which is quite interesting. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

And now I have two children and their parents are also...

I remember when we got divorced and we told the kids
said to the kids, because you should tell - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

I remember when we got divorced and we told the kids said to...

But then I remember it's a tricky thing
delicate thing because they were still small and - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

But then I remember it's a tricky thing delicate thing ...

I said, listen, love is delicate. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

I said, listen, love is delicate.

You even feed your dog
your dog on your plate when - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

You even feed your dog your dog on your plate when

One time, I remember your mom
and I were like, don't give - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

One time, I remember your mom and I were like, don't gi...

Okay, that's why we're getting divorced. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

Okay, that's why we're getting divorced.

Because you're not listening, and we can't take it anymore. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

Because you're not listening, and we can't take it...

So we'll be moving into separate houses
and have you each for the - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

So we'll be moving into separate houses and have you ea...

And it's very sad because
I love your mother very much - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

And it's very sad because I love your mother very much

That's how we managed it. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

That's how we managed it.

I remember one time
when I was six, I was crying - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

I remember one time when I was six, I was crying

And then he fucked me... - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

And then he fucked me...

He was right. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

I cried. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

Then I realized that what I'd been crying about wasn't that important. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

Then I realized that what I'd been crying about...

You have to teach your children. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

You have to teach your children.

I have to say this because my father is still alive and he could do it again. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

I have to say this because my father is still alive and he...

So yes, it didn't really happen. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

So yes, it didn't really happen.

OK - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

Just as some people say you should
should tell your children not to swear, - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

Just as some people say you should should tell your children...

So I used to tell them, listen, there are no swear words. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

So I used to tell them, listen, there are no swear words.

All the words are correct,
but there are some words that - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

All the words are correct, but there are some words that

So if you're going to use
these words, look first at the - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

So if you're going to use these words, look first at th...

It's hard to teach your children
children to know right from wrong because - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

It's hard to teach your children children to know right...

As millions of people
believe that abortion is wrong and - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

As millions of people believe that abortion is wrong and

Right or wrong, you should do it - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

Right or wrong, you should do it

I think you should try to have lots of abortions. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

I think you should try to have lots of abortions.

Here's why, because it creates jobs.... - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

Here's why, because it creates jobs....

For nurses, doctors and garbage collectors, everyone has a job. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

For nurses, doctors and garbage collectors, everyone has a...

How will he feed his children if you don't kill yours? - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

How will he feed his children if you don't kill yours?

We're all in the same boat. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

We're all in the same boat.

Abortion is a big topic of discussion right now, of course, because Roe v. Wade has been overturned. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

Abortion is a big topic of discussion right now, of course,...

Roe was a woman who wanted an abortion and Wade was the baby, I guess. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

Roe was a woman who wanted an abortion and Wade was the...

I'm just guessing. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

I'm just guessing.

I never knew who Wade was. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

I never knew who Wade was.

I just assume it's the baby. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

I just assume it's the baby.

But anyway, now we have to make real laws rather than jurisprudence. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

But anyway, now we have to make real laws rather than...

Each state must pass its own abortion law and listen to the people. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

Each state must pass its own abortion law and listen to the...

I think the American people, on average, want the same thing. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

I think the American people, on average, want the same...

They want abortion to be available, but limit it a little. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

They want abortion to be available, but limit it a little.

Just, you know, just, you know, go ahead, but don't be like, woohoo! - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

Just, you know, just, you know, go ahead, but don't be...

You can have an abortion anywhere, anytime, but you have to eat it. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

You can have an abortion anywhere, anytime, but you have to...

I think because it will make you hesitate a little. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

I think because it will make you hesitate a little.

Do I have to fucking eat it? - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

Do I have to fucking eat it?

I'd better do it fast. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

I'd better do it fast.

I'm just trying to find something that everyone can agree on. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

I'm just trying to find something that everyone can...

If you use a condom, you prevent the sperm from reaching the egg. - Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden

If you use a condom, you prevent the sperm from reaching the...

Louis C.K. : Back to the Garden poster

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Louis C.K. recorded live on January 28, 2023 at Madison Square Garden in New York City.

User Rating: 0.0 (0 ratings)

Director: Louis C.K.

Writer: Louis C.K.

Production: N/A

Genre: comedy

Year: 2023

MetaScore: N/A/100

ImdbRating: 7.5

BoxOffice: N/A

Released: 28 Jan 2023

Awards: N/A

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