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Sorry? - Love Guaranteed is robbing people
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Love, Guaranteed

Sorry?- Love Guaranteed is robbing people of 29.95 a month with their slogan,"You'll find...

Sorry?
- Love Guaranteed is robbing people of 29.95 a month with their slogan,
"You'll find love, guaranteed." Well, I've been on 986 different dates, and not one of them has provided me love

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.458
- Sorry? - Love Guaranteed is robbing people
00:00:03.541 --> 00:00:05.000
of 29.95 a month
00:00:05.083 --> 00:00:07.541
with their slogan, "You'll find love, guaranteed."
00:00:07.075 --> 00:00:10.041
Well, I've been on 986 different dates,
00:00:10.125 --> 00:00:12.625
and not one of them has provided me love.
Duration
13 seconds
Views
50
Timestamp in Movie
00:07:56
Uploaded
May 29, 2025
Genres
romance, comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

A lawyer takes on a new client that wants to sue a dating website because it guarantees love.
Nine hundred and eighty-six dates with... - Love, Guaranteed 00:05
Nine hundred and eighty-six dates with...
Yes, the user agreement fine print states that - Love, Guaranteed 00:08
Yes, the user agreement fine print states that
Still a little in the weeds - Love, Guaranteed 00:07
Still a little in the weeds
It's a great question. Uh, breakfast, lunch, and dinner dates. - Love, Guaranteed 00:04
It's a great question. Uh, breakfast, lunch, and dinner...
Did it ever occur to you that maybe - Love, Guaranteed 00:08
Did it ever occur to you that maybe
I'm not saying it at the date. I'm not like, "Hey, guy's gotta eat." - Love, Guaranteed 00:08
I'm not saying it at the date. I'm not like, "...
Think what you want, but Love Guaranteed - Love, Guaranteed 00:05
Think what you want, but Love Guaranteed
It is reckless endangerment of the human heart - Love, Guaranteed 00:05
It is reckless endangerment of the human heart
Let me review the merits of your case first. - Love, Guaranteed 00:05
Let me review the merits of your case first.
Pretty sure your team - Love, Guaranteed 00:05
Pretty sure your team
Bills, bills, - Love, Guaranteed 00:05
Bills, bills,
But I did put a Bed Bath and Beyond coupon in there, so it's not all bad news. - Love, Guaranteed 00:05
But I did put a Bed Bath and Beyond coupon in there, so it&#...
- I'm dying and everything hurts. - Aw, buddy. - Love, Guaranteed 00:04
- I'm dying and everything hurts. - Aw, buddy.
Excuse me while I drop my decaf in slow motion. - Love, Guaranteed 00:04
Excuse me while I drop my decaf in slow motion.
Obnoxious, gross, hot only to a certain desperate kind of woman - Love, Guaranteed 00:08
Obnoxious, gross, hot only to a certain desperate kind of wo...
- Hey, everybody! - Woo-hoo - Love, Guaranteed 00:05
- Hey, everybody! - Woo-hoo
Hmm. Saint Gideon did not miraculously fall from the sky - Love, Guaranteed 00:06
Hmm. Saint Gideon did not miraculously fall from the sky
Can you believe this guy's been on almost a thousand dates? - Love, Guaranteed 00:04
Can you believe this guy's been on almost a thousand da...
He's exploiting this company over a tiny detail in the fine print. - Love, Guaranteed 00:04
He's exploiting this company over a tiny detail in the ...
It would mean that my employees could stop job hunting. - Love, Guaranteed 00:05
It would mean that my employees could stop job hunting.