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MacGruber:
[begging for Piper to join team]
Don't make me beg here, because I will do it. I am so sorry, I am so goddamn sorry! Look I'm freaking out here! I killed them! I killed them all! I'm so fucking stupid! I don't know what I'm doing and everybody hates me! [long silence] MacGruber:
I will suck your dick, I will suck your fucking dick, just join my team. I'll suck your dick, you can fuck me, you can get fucked by me. You can watch me fuck something? Just point at something in the room and I'll fuck it for you! Just tell me what you want me to fuck! Lt. Dixon Piper:
Jesus Christ, MacGruber! MacGruber:
Just tell me what you want me to fuck!
[begging for Piper to join team]
Don't make me beg here, because I will do it. I am so sorry, I am so goddamn sorry! Look I'm freaking out here! I killed them! I killed them all! I'm so fucking stupid! I don't know what I'm doing and everybody hates me! [long silence] MacGruber:
I will suck your dick, I will suck your fucking dick, just join my team. I'll suck your dick, you can fuck me, you can get fucked by me. You can watch me fuck something? Just point at something in the room and I'll fuck it for you! Just tell me what you want me to fuck! Lt. Dixon Piper:
Jesus Christ, MacGruber! MacGruber:
Just tell me what you want me to fuck!
Full Transcript
00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.662
Look I'm freaking out here
00:00:03.077 --> 00:00:05.931
I killed them I killed them all
00:00:06.038 --> 00:00:08.404
I'm so fucking stupid
00:00:09.509 --> 00:00:12.774
I don't know what I'm doing and everybody hates me
00:00:16.883 --> 00:00:19.545
Look I will suck your dick
00:00:20.586 --> 00:00:22.998
I will suck your fucking dick
00:00:22.121 --> 00:00:24.851
I will do it just join my team
00:00:24.957 --> 00:00:26.001
I'll suck your dick
00:00:26.125 --> 00:00:28.065
You can fuck me or get fucked by me
00:00:28.761 --> 00:00:30.353
You can watch me fuck something
00:00:30.463 --> 00:00:33.001
Just point at something in the room and I'll fuck it for you
00:00:33.199 --> 00:00:35.224
Come on just tell me what you want me to fuck
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Movie Summary
Former special operative MacGruber is called back into action to take down his arch-enemy, Dieter Von Cunth, who's in possession of a nuclear warhead and bent on destroying Washington, D.C.

