In a land beyond space and time... A new world enslaved. This is a land in need of a hero....
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Quote
Title Card:
[mock movie trailer]
In a land beyond space and time...
Trailer Voice Guy:
A new world enslaved. This is a land in need of a hero.
[Trejo removes his space helmet]
Trailer Voice Guy:
They call him... MACHETE.
[echoing]
Trailer Voice Guy:
Machete Machete.
Trailer Voice Guy:
He knows the score.
Space Babe:
We need a leader. We need a revolution. We need you, Machete.
Trailer Voice Guy:
He gets the space babes.
[deep kiss]
Luz:
The people needs us, Machete. This is a new network. It's all... galactic and shit.
Machete:
He thinks he's God in heaven. So heaven must fall.
Trailer Voice Guy:
And he kills the bad guys. Starring Danny Trejo, Michelle Rodriguez...
Luz:
Eat photons, bitches!
Trailer Voice Guy:
...Alexa Vega. With Justin Beaver, as Bleep. And Lady Gaga, as
[provoctive music]
Trailer Voice Guy:
whoever she wants to be. With special guest star Leonardo DiCaprio, as the Man in the Silver Mask.
[in a lower voice]
Trailer Voice Guy:
Actor subject to change.
[louder]
Trailer Voice Guy:
Machete Kills Again... in Space.
[lower voice again]
Trailer Voice Guy:
Rated X for cigarette use, prolonged sexual content, pervasive language, and space violence.
Transcript
00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.876
It's all galactic and shit
00:00:03.961 --> 00:00:06.879
He thinks he's God in Heaven
00:00:07.715 --> 00:00:09.507
So Heaven must fall
00:00:09.591 --> 00:00:12.719
NARRATOR And he kills the bad guys
00:00:13.001 --> 00:00:14.762
Starring Danny Trejo
00:00:15.347 --> 00:00:17.001
Michelle Rodriguez
00:00:17.099 --> 00:00:18.766
Eat photons bitches
00:00:20.185 --> 00:00:22.052
Alexa Vega
00:00:22.604 --> 00:00:25.273
With Justin Bieber as Bleep BEEPING
00:00:28.444 --> 00:00:31.779
And Lady Gaga as
00:00:31.864 --> 00:00:34.024
whoever she wants to be
00:00:35.576 --> 00:00:38.911
With special guest star
00:00:40.205 --> 00:00:44.667
Leonardo DiCaprio as the Man in the Silver Mask
00:00:44.752 --> 00:00:45.793
GRUNTS
00:00:46.795 --> 00:00:48.671
Actor subject to change
00:00:48.964 --> 00:00:49.964
GRUNTS
00:00:50.299 --> 00:00:51.966
Machete Kills Again
00:00:54.636 --> 00:00:57.138
In Space
00:00:57.931 --> 00:00:59.724
Rated X for cigarette use prolonged sexual content
00:00:59.808 --> 00:01:01.642
pervasive language and space violence
Clip duration: 64 seconds
Views: 157
Timestamp in movie: 00h 01m 35s
Uploaded: 21 November, 2022
Genres: action, crime, thriller
Summary: The U.S. government recruits Machete to battle his way through Mexico in order to take down an arms dealer who looks to launch a weapon into space.
Comments
Actors
00:09 And why help the US
00:10 For crying out loud
00:06 I'm President Rathcock and I approve this message
00:17 Immigration
00:16 The M4 carbine long range
00:15 I got news for you cabr n
00:06 You wouldn't happen to have a Popsicle
00:11 Your sense of direction doesn't inspire confidence se...
00:14 One minute they're tearing ass for the border
00:07 I can't see but I could still kick your ass
00:03 You gotta check this out
00:03 Where the fuck are they
00:05 Machete don't tweet
00:04 The people need us Machete
00:05 Machete don't smoke
00:12 What happened to world peace
00:26 I knew I smelled bitch in the air tonight
00:24 Watch it now pussycat
00:10 Machete don't fail
00:09 However you know Mexico Hell you are Mexico