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Mark Normand: Soup to Nuts

He's like, "If it was up to me,you'd be in jail." If I go to jail for this,I want murderer...

He's like, "If it was up to me,
you'd be in jail." If I go to jail for this,
I want murderer status

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.211
He's like, "If it was up to me, you'd be in jail."
00:00:03.294 --> 00:00:05.255
If I go to jail for this, I want murderer status.
Duration
6 seconds
Views
30
Timestamp in Movie
00:32:28
Uploaded
Apr 13, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

From awkward lap dances to the intimacy of letting one rip in front of a spouse, comedian Mark Normand unloads in this rapid-fire stand-up special.
The guys talking. "What are you in for?" "Grand theft auto." "Assault." - Mark Normand: Soup to Nuts 00:11
The guys talking. "What are you in for?" "Gra...
They're like, "Whoa, why'd you do that?" I'm like, "Caught him inside my girl." - Mark Normand: Soup to Nuts 00:06
They're like, "Whoa, why'd you do...
After the abortion, she was like, "We should celebrate with a drink." - Mark Normand: Soup to Nuts 00:08
After the abortion, she was like, "We should celebrate ...
But, you know, it's good you guys can come out for a yuk. - Mark Normand: Soup to Nuts 00:05
But, you know, it's good you guys can come out for a yu...
Imagine explaining a Peloton to someone in a Third World country. - Mark Normand: Soup to Nuts 00:05
Imagine explaining a Peloton to someone in a Third World cou...
"Whoa, you spent $3,000 on a bike? Must be pretty fast." - Mark Normand: Soup to Nuts 00:44
"Whoa, you spent $3,000 on a bike? Must be pretty fast....
Good one. Good to have you. Thank you. Just don't cough. - Mark Normand: Soup to Nuts 00:06
Good one. Good to have you. Thank you. Just don't cough...
Pakistan? Hey, hopefully only one of us bombs. - Mark Normand: Soup to Nuts 00:06
Pakistan? Hey, hopefully only one of us bombs.
My buddy's a Mexican immigrant. Been here eight years. He loves America. - Mark Normand: Soup to Nuts 00:06
My buddy's a Mexican immigrant. Been here eight years. ...
He's like, "I just got here." - Mark Normand: Soup to Nuts 00:06
He's like, "I just got here."
Immigrants tend to appreciate America more than most Americans. - Mark Normand: Soup to Nuts 00:05
Immigrants tend to appreciate America more than most America...
And I'm like, "Where the fuck's my Uber Eats?" - Mark Normand: Soup to Nuts 00:14
And I'm like, "Where the fuck's my Uber Eats?...
You come to America, you make it big, you make a couple of bucks, you get rich. - Mark Normand: Soup to Nuts 00:06
You come to America, you make it big, you make a couple of b...
Feels like we hate rich people. Isn't that weird? See that online a lot. - Mark Normand: Soup to Nuts 00:06
Feels like we hate rich people. Isn't that weird? See t...
"Fuck the rich, kill the rich, eat the rich." - Mark Normand: Soup to Nuts 00:07
"Fuck the rich, kill the rich, eat the rich."
"Look at that old bastard. Probably shit his pants." - Mark Normand: Soup to Nuts 00:06
"Look at that old bastard. Probably shit his pants.&quo...
We all go to 7-Eleven, "Gimme that scratch-off." - Mark Normand: Soup to Nuts 00:06
We all go to 7-Eleven, "Gimme that scratch-off."
"Rich prick. Come on, big money." - Mark Normand: Soup to Nuts 00:23
"Rich prick. Come on, big money."
Rich guy's like, "My beach house burned down in Malibu." - Mark Normand: Soup to Nuts 00:20
Rich guy's like, "My beach house burned down in Ma...
"Teachers are heroes." Some are heroes, some fuck their students. - Mark Normand: Soup to Nuts 00:05
"Teachers are heroes." Some are heroes, some fuck ...