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Matt Rife: Natural Selection

So like, he been eating my children. I figured

So like, he been eating my children. I figured

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:02.000
So like,
00:00:02.335 --> 00:00:04.796
he been eating my children. I figured...
Duration
6 seconds
Views
43
Timestamp in Movie
00:28:36
Uploaded
Apr 12, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

Matt embarked on a sold-out world tour. Now in his first Netflix comedy special, Matt leaves no topic untouched - from crystals to social media trolls - and no audience member spared.
I figure we built a good rapport and understanding, you know? - Matt Rife: Natural Selection 00:05
I figure we built a good rapport and understanding, you know...
You're not gonna kill the cow when you get the milk for free. - Matt Rife: Natural Selection 00:05
You're not gonna kill the cow when you get the milk for...
That's just... That's bad Business 101. You know? - Matt Rife: Natural Selection 00:05
That's just... That's bad Business 101. You know?
That's how you get early onset Candy Cane - Matt Rife: Natural Selection 00:07
That's how you get early onset Candy Cane
It's also a waste of your time - Matt Rife: Natural Selection 00:11
It's also a waste of your time
It's gotta be a direct hit, or it does no damage at all. And I'm... - Matt Rife: Natural Selection 00:05
It's gotta be a direct hit, or it does no damage at all...
I'm realizing right now, I need more guy fans. That'd help a lot. - Matt Rife: Natural Selection 00:06
I'm realizing right now, I need more guy fans. That...
If this room was 70% dudes the way it is women, this joke would have been like... - Matt Rife: Natural Selection 00:06
If this room was 70% dudes the way it is women, this joke wo...
'Cause all the dudes get it - Matt Rife: Natural Selection 00:07
'Cause all the dudes get it
Kind of, consistency-wise, it's not far off from a jellyfish. - Matt Rife: Natural Selection 00:05
Kind of, consistency-wise, it's not far off from a jell...
I think that's what helps us get through the embarrassment of puberty - Matt Rife: Natural Selection 00:13
I think that's what helps us get through the embarrassm...
It's just embarrassing mistake after embarrassing mistake. - Matt Rife: Natural Selection 00:05
It's just embarrassing mistake after embarrassing mista...
I... I mean, I suppose nobody understands the difficulty more than women - Matt Rife: Natural Selection 00:12
I... I mean, I suppose nobody understands the difficulty mor...
Y'all are just thrown to the wilderness with no owner's manual or nothing. - Matt Rife: Natural Selection 00:06
Y'all are just thrown to the wilderness with no owner&#...
You already have to walk us through every step of the way, - Matt Rife: Natural Selection 00:08
You already have to walk us through every step of the way,
How many times have you fingered a girl for so long - Matt Rife: Natural Selection 00:10
How many times have you fingered a girl for so long
Ahh! Ahh! Ahh! - Matt Rife: Natural Selection 00:05
Ahh! Ahh! Ahh!
Did I indoor rock climb for nine hours? - Matt Rife: Natural Selection 00:06
Did I indoor rock climb for nine hours?
I'm walking around the next day pointing at shit like Spider-Man - Matt Rife: Natural Selection 00:06
I'm walking around the next day pointing at shit like S...
It's like great. Yeah, you came, and I got cerebral palsy. - Matt Rife: Natural Selection 00:05
It's like great. Yeah, you came, and I got cerebral pal...