Me, Myself & Irene quotes
Charlie Baileygates (Jim Carrey) is a Rhode Island state trooper with multiple personalities. He is otherwise mild-mannered and non-confrontational until somebody or something pushes him a little too far. That's when his maniacal alter-ego, Hank, takes over. Charlie is assigned on a routine mission to return alleged fugitive Irene Waters (Renée Zellweger) back to upstate New York, but they wind up on the run from corrupt Police Officers. And their escape would be a lot simpler on everybody involved if Hank didn't keep stepping in at the most inopportune times.
Director: Bobby Farrelly, Peter Farrelly
Writer: Peter Farrelly, Mike Cerrone, Bobby Farrelly
Production: Twentieth Century Fox, Conundrum Entertainment
Genre: comedy
Year: 2000
MetaScore: 49/100
ImdbRating: 6.6
BoxOffice: $90,570,999
Released: 23 Jun 2000
Awards: 2 wins & 4 nominations.
60 Clips & Quotes
00:22
I think you're a very special unit
00:52
What are you staring at
03:16
I can't figure out the atomic mass of this motherfuckin'...
00:52
He may have advanced delusionary schizophrenia with...
00:17
Just because I rock doesn't mean I'm made of stone
01:00
Unless you put your ear to the ground
01:01
I'm talking to you
00:45
Stay away from me
01:05
You keep fuckin' around
00:25
I'm not leaving till the morning
00:28
You hear the news
00:31
I never wanted to sleep with you
00:15
What's your tale
00:16
He folds under pressure
00:59
What's the matter
00:39
Is my old lady happy
00:43
What are those for
00:43
Advanced delusionary schizophrenia with involuntary...
00:53
What's the diameter of a chicken egg
00:32
Man how the hell can they call Pluto a planet
00:17
You son of a bitch
00:17
Get your cock out of my Chrysler
00:48
But I hope that never happens
00:27
But you said you'd eat whale blubber
00:34
I'm gonna tell my daddy on you
00:34
And the name's Hank
00:15
So I smoked some pot
00:28
Holy Jesus in heaven
01:17
Really appreciate your help
00:34
Do we people take checks
00:19
I've seen it first hand
01:28
I ain't saying I can read the shit all that good
00:35
Calling that cop was unbelievably stupid
00:42
Why didn't you take a vacation when Layla left
00:41
I'll tell you one thing
00:41
It's gonna be raining wine and roses tonight
00:43
What happened to your family
00:16
I parked it for ya
00:29
For your information
00:20
My name is Charlie Baileygates
00:16
Thanks for watching our motherfucking movie
00:28
But my friends call me Whitey
00:22
I am personally gonna fuck him up
00:33
Does your ass feel numb
00:12
Ever been bitch slapped
00:28
Whatever you say
00:28
I noticed you conveniently left out your eating disorder
00:25
Why am I peeing like I was up all night having sex
00:20
You should be furious
00:39
These two motherfuckers can do the shopping
00:21
Free hot dogs here
00:27
We just got a report that he put six bullets into a prize...
01:21
Your golf buddy
00:33
He's a funny motherfucker
00:55
I never said anything remotely racist
00:16
He sure is a Spartacus looking motherfucker
00:25
What the hell are you still doing here
00:24
My daddy ain't killed nobody
00:37
It's funny how a man reacts when his heart has been broken
00:11
I want my own cell
Cast
Charlie - Jim Carrey
Irene - Renée Zellweger
Jamaal - Anthony Anderson
Lee Harvey - Mongo Brownlee
Shonté Jr. - Jerod Mixon
Lieutenant Gerke - Chris Cooper
Whitey - Michael Bowman
Agent Boshane - Richard Jenkins
Colonel Partington - Robert Forster
Officer Stubie - Mike Cerrone
Trooper Finneran - Rob Moran
Dickie Thurman - Daniel Greene
Limo Driver - Tony Cox
Lee Harvey - Age 9 - Andrew Phillips
Jamaal - Age 9 - Jeremy Maleek Leggett
Shonté Jr. - Age 9 - Justin Chandler
Agent Peterson - Zen Gesner
Neighbor Ed - Steve Sweeney
Layla - Traylor Howard
Barber Shop Car Owner - Lenny Clarke
Herb the Barber - Herbie Flynn
Jump Rope Girl - Heather Hodder
Grocery Store Mom - Tracey Abbott
Trooper Pritchard - Jackie Flynn
Maternity Doctor - Steve Tyler
Guy on the Street - Googy Gress
Helicopter Agent - Joey McGilberry
Kid's Father - Sean Gildea
Motel Manager - Anna Kournikova
Officer Delicato - Bob Mone
Gun Shop Owner - Richard Tyson
Agent Steve Parfitt - Danny Murphy
Trooper Sea Bass - Cam Neely
Soda Machine Man - Brian Hayes Currie
Trooper Maryann - Nikki Tyler-Flynn
Vermont Police Officer - Mark Leahy
Barber Shop Wiseguy - Kevin J. Flynn
Softball Player - Conrad Goode
Handsome Barber Shop Guy - John Mark Andrade
Trooper Neely - Scott T. Neely
Beautiful Mom - Shannon Whirry
Paramedic - Jerry Parker
Reporter - Heather Dyson
TV Reporter - Christine DiCarlo
Golfer - Mark Levine
Pizza Boy - John-Eliot Jordan
Train Conductor - Bob Weeks
Disabled Guy - Ezra Buzzington
Disabled Guy's Aide - Will Coogan
Narrator - Rex Allen Jr.
Mrs. Caleron - Lin Shaye
Dreadlocks Guy - Leslie Munroe
Farmer - Harley Brown Sr.
Mrs. Caleron's Son - Ray 'Rocket' Valliere
Maternity Nurse - Nancy Byers
Maternity Nurse - Melinda Farrelly
Girl in Wheelchair - Christal Handy
Farmer - Rudy Cheeks
Farmer - Preston Thomas
Executive - Libby Langdon
Executive - Gigi Moran
Executive - Pete Peterson
Golfer - J.B. Rogers
Golfer - Brian Mone
Iggy - Egor Davidoff
Paramedic - Bill Kiendl
Paramedic - Adriana Bega
Scooter - Gordie Merrick
State Trooper - Brad Matthews
Receptionist - Kate Forster
Kid - Ben Urann
Kid - Jesse Peter
Kid - Connor Dunphy
Kid - Jordan Blevins
Lady - Dot Neary
Father - Mike Turillo Sr.
Disabled Son - Mike Turillo Jr.
Shocked Lady - Joan Ledwith
Shocked Lady - Dyanne Stroyman
Shocked Lady - Jane M. Reidy
Shocked Lady - Mariann Neary
Shocked Lady - Jaqueline Feeney
State Trooper - Robert Flaherty
Grocery Store Cashier - Beth Jordan
Couple - Brian Stuebe
Couple - Sonia Stuebe
Guy - Tom Wingate
Couple - Jimmy Shay
Couple - Monica Shay
Softball Player - Scott Rosenberg
Softball Player - Mark Ciardi
Softball Player - Phil Rosenberg
Woman at Barbeque - Amy Leasca
Checkers Buddy - Jack Andrade
Crying Little Girl - A.B. Farrelly
Woman at Train Station - Tiffany Burke
Woman at Train Station - Tara Richert
Guy at Train Station - David Page
Father - Dean R. Palozej
Mother - Paula Palozej
Child - Lauren Palozej
Child - Hayden Palozej
Child - Spencer Palozej
Child - Everett Palozej
Wedding Guest - Bob O'Brien
Wedding Guest - George Bedard
Wedding Guest - Mike Cheney
Wedding Guest - Gwendolyn Rogers
Best Man - Warren Tashjian
Woman in Grocery Store - Carolyn Molloy
Woman in Grocery Store - Patty Mullany Molloy
Man in Grocery Store - Bryan Molloy
Bikini Girl - Deanna Cerrone
Bikini Girl - Lisette Boren
Bikini Girl - Natassia Malthe
Bikini Girl - Jeanne Basone
Bikini Girl - Onzra Myers
Grocery Store Mom's Son - Thomas Jordan
Twin Passing By - Nicholas Greenbury
Twin Passing By - Andrew Greenbury
SWAT Guy - Mark O'Day
SWAT Guy - Michael 'Don Julio' Burke
Grocery Store Guy - Mike D'Allessio
State Trooper - Brendan Shanahan
Woman Giving Statement - Taryn Chilivis
Lesbian in Restaurant - Jackie Shiffler
Lesbian in Restaurant - Tara Robare
Grocery Boy - Patrick Dragon
Office Employee - Karen Mone
Secretary - Terez Kocsis
Girl in Office - Kelsey Jordan
Boy in Office - Harrison Frick
Couple in Grocery Store - Ken Duvall
Couple in Grocery Store - Josie Duval
Girl on Bus - Ann Marie Izzi
Girl on Bus - Sarah Billington
Guy in Photo - Mike Murphy
Fireman - István Kocsis
Office Worker - Christine Mone
Office Worker - Patrick Mone
Paramedic - Scott Morehouse
Fireman - Mark Dunn
Woman in Maternity Ward - Kristen Trucksess
Woman in Maternity Ward - Wenya Monique Williams
SWAT Guy - Bill O'Connor
Spectator - Gretel Twombly
Spectator - Kevin Biegel
State Trooper - Terry Mullany
Policeman - Mike DiCarlo
Policeman - Peter Krulewitch
Policeman at Station - Don Pritchard
Policeman at Station - Tom Beachene
Guy Getting Off Train - John Sappo
Black Boy - Eric Adé
Black Girl - Marissa Adé
Black Girl - Danielle Adé
Policewoman - Cynthia Farrelly Gesner
Background Person - Adam Kanter
Background Person - Patrick Healy
Background Person - Beth Mone
Background Person - Doug Morton
Background Person - Kate Phelon
Woman at Site - Sarah Delfausse
Woman in Police Station - Kathy Twombly
Man in Police Station - Michael P. Twombly
Detective - George Gondelman
Policeman - Doug Tashjian
Policeman - Brad Blank
FBI Agent - Paul Pelletier
Paramedic - Charlie Pettygrove
FBI Agent - John Stroehman
Woman in Crowd - Megan O'Brien
Woman in Crowd - Fran O'Brien
Man in Crowd - John Chan
FBI Agent - Pete Anicelli
Guy on Railroad Tracks - Tom Kocsis
Grill Guy - Tommy Songin
Slate Guy - Matt Irwin
Motel Guest - Jim Dubois
State Trooper at Motel - Doug Bymark
State Trooper - Gerry Callahan
State Trooper - Joshua Loiko
Mother at Train Station - Margaret Boylan
Son at Train Station - Mac Boylan
Daughter at Train Station - Georgia Boylan
Paramedic - Bill Hoyle
Paramedic - Joan Hoyle
Man on Scene - Peter Biegel
Woman on Scene - Alice Biegel
Background Motel Guest - Dotan Bonen
Background Motel Guest - Ernie Malik
Background Motel Guest - William Sherak
Background Motel Guest - Matt Swick
Background Motel Guest - Jeff Kuno
Ice Cream Vendor - Malcolm Wilson
Ice Cream Girl - Ariana Parrillo
Ice Cream Girl - Liza Battaini
Ice Cream Girl - Diana Spaulding
Ice Cream Girl - Moriah Cowles
Person at Barbecue - Tom Leasca
Person at Barbecue - Joslin Leasca
Person at Barbecue - Stacey Leasca
Person at Barbecue - Mark Miosky
Family at Barbecue - Bill Beauchene
Kid Near Broken Window - Will Kiendl
Family Near Broken Window - The Appe Family
Bum #1 - Kevin R. Wood
Bum #2 - Robert Martini
SWAT Guy - Rick Dunphy
Background Person - Jan Kane
Background Person - Tom Clark
Background Person - Kathleen Straube
Background FBI Agent - Heikki Paadre
Family at Picnic - Victoria O'Day
Family at Picnic - Susan O'Day
Family at Picnic - Luke O'Day
Family at Picnic - Emily O'Day
Background Couple - Smokey Cerrone
Background Couple - Annette Cerrone
Background Person - Glenn Ciano
Family in Restaurant - Keith McLaughlin
Family in Restaurant - Jill McLaughlin
Woman in Restaurant - Mecina Bottaro
Couple in Restaurant - Philomena Gidea
Couple in Restaurant - James Gidea
Wedding Guest - Pam O'Brien
Wedding Guest - Dan O'Brien
Minister - Ken Gumbert
Wedding Guest - Barbara Tuchon
Background Person - Billy Meyer
Background Person - Ruth Michelle Meyer
Background Person - Margo Murphy
Background Person - Monique Pelletier
SWAT Guy - David James Ward
Detective at Motel - Peter Gaulke
State Trooper at Motel - Gerry Swallow
State Trooper at Motel - Dave McVeigh
Policeman - Dino Macaluso
Family at Barbecue - Ellie Miosky
Family at Barbecue - Ben Miosky
Family at Barbecue - Kate Miosky
Background Couple - Mac Haskell
Background Couple - Trish Haskell
Background State Trooper - Dan Walenty
Background State Trooper - Jim Bennett
Guy in Bar - Jay W. Yowler
Guy in Bar - Todd Christiansen
Ed's Wife - Julie Scungio
Family at Site - Bobby Lippincott
Family at Site - Pucky Lippincott
Family at Site - Richard Lippincott
FBI Agent - John Dennis
SWAT Person at Motel - Sarah Lopez
SWAT Person at Motel - Annie Hodgson
State Trooper at Motel - Matt Smith
Paramedic - Nancy Frey-Jarecki
Actor - Steve Moran
Actor - Mike O'Donnell
Background Person - Al Lampe
Background Person - Mary Lampe
Background Person - Docky
State Trooper - Eric Lariviere
State Trooper - Glenn Skalubinski
State Trooper - Bob Magnan
FBI Agent - Stephen Mone
FBI Agent - Chris 'Chili' Palmer
Guy on Plane - Bennett Yellin
Mooner on Plane - Steve Gehrke
Party Guest - Christopher Alan
State Trooper's Wife - Rebekah Aramini
Train Station Cart Vendor - Eric Bruno Borgman
Vermont Police Officer - Barry Brandt
Irate Motorist - Paul Bronk
Train Conductor - Bruce Duncan
Female Golfer - Tara Perkins
Stand-Up Comedian on TV - Richard Pryor
Beach Girl - Cinzia Roccaforte
Stand-Up Comedian on TV - Chris Rock
Detective - Michael Steven Swanson
Self - Tanner Wiley
Guy at Train Station - James Woodson