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I never realized we had creaky floorboards
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Michael McIntyre: Showman

I never realized we had creaky floorboards until I started creeping around on themin the...

I never realized we had creaky floorboards until I started creeping around on them
in the middle of the night

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:04.048
I never realized we had creaky floorboards
00:00:04.056 --> 00:00:07.072
until I started creeping around on them in the middle of the night.
Duration
8 seconds
Views
168
Timestamp in Movie
00:07:04
Uploaded
Jun 03, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

Charming comic Michael McIntyre talks family, technology, sharks, accents and the time he confused himself for a world leader in this stand-up special.
I've never noticed the floorboards make a noise in the daytime. - Michael McIntyre: Showman 00:04
I've never noticed the floorboards make a noise in the ...
Her arm is subconsciously reaching for her mobile. - Michael McIntyre: Showman 00:04
Her arm is subconsciously reaching for her mobile.
"No!" - Michael McIntyre: Showman 00:07
"No!"
"Fuck!" - Michael McIntyre: Showman 00:06
"Fuck!"
We had an extractor fan - Michael McIntyre: Showman 00:06
We had an extractor fan
It's the loudest thing in the world! It's gonna wake my wife up! - Michael McIntyre: Showman 00:04
It's the loudest thing in the world! It's gonna wa...
There's not a switch for light - Michael McIntyre: Showman 00:04
There's not a switch for light
Because it's all about sound, - Michael McIntyre: Showman 00:08
Because it's all about sound,
But you can't pee into the water, - Michael McIntyre: Showman 00:04
But you can't pee into the water,
...to find the sweet spot of the bowl - Michael McIntyre: Showman 00:07
...to find the sweet spot of the bowl
Yes! This acknowledgment of night peeing! - Michael McIntyre: Showman 00:04
Yes! This acknowledgment of night peeing!
And sometimes you're peeing and you hear a different sound, you know, like, "Ooh, - Michael McIntyre: Showman 00:07
And sometimes you're peeing and you hear a different so...
I've overcompensated." - Michael McIntyre: Showman 00:05
I've overcompensated."
"Yep, I've pissed on the floor." - Michael McIntyre: Showman 00:06
"Yep, I've pissed on the floor."
You create a sort of foot mop situation, - Michael McIntyre: Showman 00:09
You create a sort of foot mop situation,
"How's your life going, Michael?" "Well, I'm just foot-mopping piss - Michael McIntyre: Showman 00:06
"How's your life going, Michael?" "Well,...
Other than that, really, really happy." - Michael McIntyre: Showman 00:07
Other than that, really, really happy."
Soon as I get into the bedroom, I can see my wife's face glowing. - Michael McIntyre: Showman 00:06
Soon as I get into the bedroom, I can see my wife's fac...
I've bought three pairs of shoes there." - Michael McIntyre: Showman 00:04
I've bought three pairs of shoes there."
I've started having a Berocca before bed, - Michael McIntyre: Showman 00:08
I've started having a Berocca before bed,