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"Murder by Death" quotes

Murder by Death poster
Lionel Twain invites the world's five greatest detectives to a 'dinner and murder'. Included are a blind butler, a deaf-mute maid, screams, spinning rooms, secret passages, false identities and more plot turns and twists than are decently allowed.

Director: Robert Moore
Writer: Neil Simon
Production: Sony Pictures Entertainment
Genre: comedy, crime, mystery, thriller
Year: 1976
MetaScore: 62/100
ImdbRating: 7.4
BoxOffice: N/A
Released: 23 Jun 1976
Awards: Nominated for 1 Golden Globe. Another 1 nomination.

176 Clips

Sam DiamondSidney WangWillie WangDora CharlestonDick CharlestonLionel TwainTess SkeffingtonJessica MarblesMilo PerrierMarcel
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You've saved our lives - Murder by Death 00:36 You've saved our lives Look at invitation - Murder by Death 00:11 Look at invitation What do you make of all of this - Murder by Death 00:14 What do you make of all of this We're going to have a lovely murderpoo - Murder by Death 00:07 We're going to have a lovely murderpoo Why don't you push her wheelchair down the driveway - Murder by Death 00:06 Why don't you push her wheelchair down the driveway My feet are killing me - Murder by Death 00:08 My feet are killing me We have been expecting you - Murder by Death 00:09 We have been expecting you May I get your bags - Murder by Death 00:08 May I get your bags I'm going down the hall to find the can - Murder by Death 00:14 I'm going down the hall to find the can Observe strange sounds - Murder by Death 00:26 Observe strange sounds You know how I get when you touch me there - Murder by Death 00:14 You know how I get when you touch me there You pit your wits with me - Murder by Death 00:05 You pit your wits with me I don't like it one bit - Murder by Death 00:07 I don't like it one bit Monsieur Perrier - Murder by Death 00:11 Monsieur Perrier Bizarre little twit - Murder by Death 00:04 Bizarre little twit Except for the fact that he's dead - Murder by Death 00:08 Except for the fact that he's dead Should have adopted pussycat - Murder by Death 00:07 Should have adopted pussycat But I was talking about patricide - Murder by Death 00:06 But I was talking about patricide Where is the soup - Murder by Death 00:10 Where is the soup That's a pretty tacky thing to say - Murder by Death 00:08 That's a pretty tacky thing to say My wife Dora Inspector Perrier - Murder by Death 00:13 My wife Dora Inspector Perrier With our dinner - Murder by Death 00:10 With our dinner Go back in kitchen - Murder by Death 00:12 Go back in kitchen Very interesting theory Mr Charleston - Murder by Death 00:15 Very interesting theory Mr Charleston I think butler is dead - Murder by Death 00:11 I think butler is dead Why do you keep all those naked muscle men magazines in your office - Murder by Death 00:11 Why do you keep all those naked muscle men magazines in your... If you'll excuse me I intend to have a little talk with the cook - Murder by Death 00:06 If you'll excuse me I intend to have a little talk with... What an entrance - Murder by Death 00:05 What an entrance He was a most cruel man - Murder by Death 00:14 He was a most cruel man Stop that - Murder by Death 00:18 Stop that Where were you Wang We was worried - Murder by Death 00:04 Where were you Wang We was worried Oh yes As you can see - Murder by Death 00:09 Oh yes As you can see Holy Shanghai - Murder by Death 00:05 Holy Shanghai The lady here in the rented dress is my secretary and mistress - Murder by Death 00:07 The lady here in the rented dress is my secretary and... I don't feel good about this - Murder by Death 00:19 I don't feel good about this Never consider murder to be business - Murder by Death 00:07 Never consider murder to be business I trust you've all been made comfortable - Murder by Death 00:14 I trust you've all been made comfortable Have admired you ever since I was tiny little detective - Murder by Death 00:06 Have admired you ever since I was tiny little detective If you ask me anybody that offers a million bucks to solve a crime that ain't been committed yet - Murder by Death 00:09 If you ask me anybody that offers a million bucks to solve a... I refuse to discuss this with wives - Murder by Death 00:05 I refuse to discuss this with wives A mannequin - Murder by Death 00:06 A mannequin Doors and windows will automatically open at dawn - Murder by Death 00:11 Doors and windows will automatically open at dawn You have chocolate on your face - Murder by Death 00:27 You have chocolate on your face Butler only killed to divert us from real murder still to come - Murder by Death 00:08 Butler only killed to divert us from real murder still to... I hope he knows how to stop that thing - Murder by Death 00:06 I hope he knows how to stop that thing I beg your your pardon - Murder by Death 00:20 I beg your your pardon Jessie baby - Murder by Death 00:04 Jessie baby I prefer to be called - Murder by Death 00:06 I prefer to be called What number of house - Murder by Death 00:11 What number of house Blind people have a very keen sense of smell - Murder by Death 00:13 Blind people have a very keen sense of smell All right all of you Nobody move - Murder by Death 00:19 All right all of you Nobody move No pulse - Murder by Death 00:13 No pulse You should see the other guy - Murder by Death 00:08 You should see the other guy She died in here - Murder by Death 00:20 She died in here We keep this room locked - Murder by Death 00:17 We keep this room locked You didn't tell me how I look Dicky - Murder by Death 00:19 You didn't tell me how I look Dicky Ah yes I had the pleasure of dining in Shanghai many years ago with Inspector Wang - Murder by Death 00:16 Ah yes I had the pleasure of dining in Shanghai many years... No you see here Mr Charleston of New York Palm Beach and Beverly Hills - Murder by Death 00:27 No you see here Mr Charleston of New York Palm Beach and... Or you Mr Perrier - Murder by Death 00:18 Or you Mr Perrier True We heard the gunshots - Murder by Death 00:45 True We heard the gunshots Because you were born with brains talent money - Murder by Death 00:20 Because you were born with brains talent money Perfect sweetheart They took the bait like a dumb alabit - Murder by Death 00:12 Perfect sweetheart They took the bait like a dumb alabit I was adopted - Murder by Death 00:27 I was adopted Holy cow They're killing someone in there - Murder by Death 00:13 Holy cow They're killing someone in there Twain has macabre sense of humor - Murder by Death 00:06 Twain has macabre sense of humor You're spitting on the nurse - Murder by Death 00:05 You're spitting on the nurse Marvin Metzner - Murder by Death 00:05 Marvin Metzner That tickin' sound you hear Mr Diamond is a bomb in your room - Murder by Death 00:13 That tickin' sound you hear Mr Diamond is a bomb in... Never underestimate a Frenchman s nostrils Miss Twain - Murder by Death 00:06 Never underestimate a Frenchman s nostrils Miss Twain No one is leaving this house - Murder by Death 00:06 No one is leaving this house Strange weather - Murder by Death 00:20 Strange weather I am and I will not stay in this horribly filthy room overnight - Murder by Death 00:16 I am and I will not stay in this horribly filthy room... Well maybe not for you seein' as how you put all your money into vegetables - Murder by Death 00:21 Well maybe not for you seein' as how you put all your... She's off I could use a good stiff shot Mr Charleston - Murder by Death 00:10 She's off I could use a good stiff shot Mr Charleston Sorry if I'm shocking you ma'am but I never had time to go to finishing school - Murder by Death 00:11 Sorry if I'm shocking you ma'am but I never had... What do we all do now Just sit around and wait for one of us to be butchered - Murder by Death 00:05 What do we all do now Just sit around and wait for one of us... It's your funeral butter balls - Murder by Death 00:05 It's your funeral butter balls Know what I mean Sam you're spitting on the nurse - Murder by Death 00:09 Know what I mean Sam you're spitting on the nurse On the stroke of midnight - Murder by Death 00:21 On the stroke of midnight Where are they What have you done with the others you short madman - Murder by Death 00:06 Where are they What have you done with the others you short... He's right You're one smart Chinaman Mr Wang - Murder by Death 00:05 He's right You're one smart Chinaman Mr Wang You've all been so clever for so long - Murder by Death 00:09 You've all been so clever for so long You're a clever little laundry man Mr Wang - Murder by Death 00:05 You're a clever little laundry man Mr Wang I was not jilted I walked out on him - Murder by Death 00:15 I was not jilted I walked out on him She's a cocktail waitress at the Waterbed Motel in Carmel - Murder by Death 00:05 She's a cocktail waitress at the Waterbed Motel in... Goldman was killed last month while skiing - Murder by Death 00:08 Goldman was killed last month while skiing Is that the cook's arm - Murder by Death 00:07 Is that the cook's arm And so too ladies and gentlemen - Murder by Death 00:07 And so too ladies and gentlemen
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Cast

Tess Skeffington - Eileen Brennan
Lionel Twain - Truman Capote
Milo Perrier - James Coco
Sam Diamond - Peter Falk
Bensonmum - Alec Guinness
All Cast