"National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation" quotes

National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation poster
The Griswold family's plans for a big family Christmas predictably turn into a big disaster.

Director: Jeremiah S. Chechik
Writer: John Hughes
Production: Warner Bros. Pictures
Genre: comedy
Year: 1989
MetaScore: 49/100
ImdbRating: 7.6
BoxOffice: N/A
Released: 01 Dec 1989
Awards: N/A

87 Clips

It's warm in here - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:33
It's warm in here
It's not going in the yard - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:26
It's not going in the yard
It's a one year membership to the Jelly of the Month Club - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:29
It's a one year membership to the Jelly of the Month Club
It seems my husband's been abducted - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:25
It seems my husband's been abducted
It was my fault - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 02:10
It was my fault
Is this the airport - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:11
Is this the airport
Is Rusty still in the navy - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:12
Is Rusty still in the navy
Is your house on fire - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:18
Is your house on fire
Is Clark coming - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:54
Is Clark coming
I'll be outside for the season - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:24
I'll be outside for the season
If this turkey tastes half as good as it looks - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:27
If this turkey tastes half as good as it looks
If that thing had nine lives - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:17
If that thing had nine lives
If they know your dad - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:38
If they know your dad
If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:31
If I woke up tomorrow with my head sewn to the carpet
If that cat had nine lives - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:17
If that cat had nine lives
If any of you are looking for any last minute gift ideas for me - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 01:30
If any of you are looking for any last minute gift ideas for...
I'd piss my pants and forget who I was for about half an hour or so - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:30
I'd piss my pants and forget who I was for about half an...
I think you've made a terrible mistake - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:19
I think you've made a terrible mistake
I simply solved the problem - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:36
I simply solved the problem
I was just smelling   smiling - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 01:03
I was just smelling smiling
I hope he falls and breaks his neck - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:31
I hope he falls and breaks his neck
I heard on the news that an airline pilot spotted Santa's sleigh on its way in from New York City - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:27
I heard on the news that an airline pilot spotted Santa's...
I have this terrible suspicion that Catherine and Eddy don't have presents for their kids - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 01:27
I have this terrible suspicion that Catherine and Eddy don't...
I have one of those at home - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 01:20
I have one of those at home
I have never been treated like this in my life - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:24
I have never been treated like this in my life
I give you the Griswold family Christmas tree - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:20
I give you the Griswold family Christmas tree
I don't want to spend the Holidays dead - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:15
I don't want to spend the Holidays dead
I don't know about the cat - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:23
I don't know about the cat
I dedicate this house to the Griswold Family Christmas - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:18
I dedicate this house to the Griswold Family Christmas
You're not doing anything constructive - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:50
You're not doing anything constructive
Your company kill all them people in India not too long ago - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:24
Your company kill all them people in India not too long ago
You want to hurry this up - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:18
You want to hurry this up
You smell something - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:11
You smell something
You set standards that no family activity can live up to - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:27
You set standards that no family activity can live up to
I can't believe you're standing here in my living room - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:31
I can't believe you're standing here in my living room
Her eyes aren't crossed - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:34
Her eyes aren't crossed
He will love you till the day you die - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:28
He will love you till the day you die
Go get the hammer - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:29
Go get the hammer
Get you something to eat - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:35
Get you something to eat
Get me somebody - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:18
Get me somebody
Fixed the newel post - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:11
Fixed the newel post
Except it's Christmas and we're all in misery - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:21
Except it's Christmas and we're all in misery
Don't throw me down - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:14
Don't throw me down
Don't piss me off - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:11
Don't piss me off
Don't go puttin' none of that stuff on my sled - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 01:38
Don't go puttin' none of that stuff on my sled
Don't forget the rubber sheets and gerbils - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:16
Don't forget the rubber sheets and gerbils
Do you sleep with your brother - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:32
Do you sleep with your brother
Do you really think it matters - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:39
Do you really think it matters
Christmas is about resolving differences - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 01:10
Christmas is about resolving differences
Burn some dust here - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:20
Burn some dust here
Bethany and I figured out the perfect gift for you - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:24
Bethany and I figured out the perfect gift for you
Before things get worse - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:38
Before things get worse
Audrey's frozen from the waist down - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:21
Audrey's frozen from the waist down
Aren't you having any breakfast - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:50
Aren't you having any breakfast
Are you sure you ain't Santa Claus - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:21
Are you sure you ain't Santa Claus
And where's the phone - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:35
And where's the phone
A letter confirming your reservation at the nuthouse - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:18
A letter confirming your reservation at the nuthouse
You just march over there and slug that creep in the face - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:35
You just march over there and slug that creep in the face
You got a kiss for me - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:29
You got a kiss for me
Would it be indecent to ask the grandparents to stay at a hotel - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:20
Would it be indecent to ask the grandparents to stay at a...
Where is Eddie - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:27
Where is Eddie
Where do you think you're gonna put a tree that big - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:40
Where do you think you're gonna put a tree that big
When did you get the tenament on wheels - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 01:02
When did you get the tenament on wheels
What's wrong with the dog - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:37
What's wrong with the dog
What's that sound - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:30
What's that sound
What are you looking at - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 01:19
What are you looking at
What about the kids - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:38
What about the kids
We're stuck under a truck - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:56
We're stuck under a truck
We checked every bulb - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:45
We checked every bulb
'Tis the season to be merry - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:13
'Tis the season to be merry
These are cut really high in the hip - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:29
These are cut really high in the hip
The little lights - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:19
The little lights
That's not the friggin' Christmas Star - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:28
That's not the friggin' Christmas Star
Talk about pissing your money away - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:35
Talk about pissing your money away
Sometimes things look good on paper - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 01:04
Sometimes things look good on paper
Something had to break the stereo - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:28
Something had to break the stereo
So what's the matter with you - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:20
So what's the matter with you
Since this is Aunt Bethany's 80th Christmas - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 01:07
Since this is Aunt Bethany's 80th Christmas
Rocky bit my thumb - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:27
Rocky bit my thumb
Remember how I was toying with the idea of suspending the Christmas bonuses - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:52
Remember how I was toying with the idea of suspending the...
Punch in the face I ever got - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:22
Punch in the face I ever got
Our holidays were always such a mess - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:27
Our holidays were always such a mess
Ooh the Crunch Enhancer - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:44
Ooh the Crunch Enhancer
Old fashioned family Christmas - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 01:39
Old fashioned family Christmas
Oh Aunt Bethany - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:35
Oh Aunt Bethany
My cousin in law - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:21
My cousin in law
Merry Christmas - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation 00:20
Merry Christmas

Cast

Clark - Chevy Chase
Clark, Sr. - John Randolph
Nora - Diane Ladd
Francis - Doris Roberts
Cousin Eddie Johnson - Randy Quaid
Cousin Catherine Johnson - Miriam Flynn
Rocky - Cody Burger
Ruby Sue - Ellen Latzen
Bethany - Mae Questel
Todd Chester - Nicholas Guest
Margo Chester - Julia Louis-Dreyfus
Delivery Boy - Keith MacKechnie
Frank Shirley - Brian Doyle-Murray
Mrs. Shirley - Natalija Nogulich
Bozo #1 - Tony Epper
Bozo #2 (as Hank Hooker) - Billy Hank Hooker
Swat Officer - Alexander Folk
Young Executive - Michael Kaufman
Parade Announcer (voice) - Doug Llewelyn
Clark (age 9) - Devin Bailey
SWAT Team Sargeant - Frank Foti Jr.
Downtown Shopper - Traci Kochendorfer