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Nikki Glaser: Bangin'

"It's my grandfather's dog tags.Hold it close." I'm just like, "Okay, good,at least the...

"It's my grandfather's dog tags.
Hold it close." I'm just like, "Okay, good,
at least the spirit of a real man will be hovering over me tonight." [crowd laughs] That's a plus, I guess.
[claps from the audience] Someone who actually fought for something
other than a parking spot at GameStop

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:05.996
"It's my grandfather's dog tags. Hold it close."
00:00:05.087 --> 00:00:07.965
I'm just like, "Okay, good, at least the spirit of a real man
00:00:08.999 --> 00:00:09.842
will be hovering over me tonight."
00:00:09.925 --> 00:00:11.052
[crowd laughs]
00:00:11.302 --> 00:00:13.471
That's a plus, I guess. [claps from the audience]
00:00:13.846 --> 00:00:19.268
Someone who actually fought for something other than a parking spot at GameStop.
Duration
19 seconds
Views
31
Timestamp in Movie
00:34:11
Uploaded
Jun 13, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
Den of Thieves

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Movie Summary

Nikki Glaser bares all in a blistering stand-up special about sex, sobriety and getting over her own insecurities. And she won't spare you the details.
I would have like a little whore's skip in my step. - Nikki Glaser: Bangin' 00:04
I would have like a little whore's skip in my step.
Like, "I just banged, and I don't even care if I hear from him. - Nikki Glaser: Bangin' 00:04
Like, "I just banged, and I don't even care if I h...
We do exist, right" - Nikki Glaser: Bangin' 00:12
We do exist, right"
"I love his necklace. Like I... love necklaces, - Nikki Glaser: Bangin' 00:09
"I love his necklace. Like I... love necklaces,
Like, I made fun of him for that necklace, - Nikki Glaser: Bangin' 00:15
Like, I made fun of him for that necklace,
[crowd laughs] - Nikki Glaser: Bangin' 00:05
[crowd laughs]
Oh my God, I wonder where I'm going to store my necklace - Nikki Glaser: Bangin' 00:06
Oh my God, I wonder where I'm going to store my necklac...
Oh my God, I bet when he's ready for me to move in with him, - Nikki Glaser: Bangin' 00:07
Oh my God, I bet when he's ready for me to move in with...
And we'll be in bed on like a Sunday morning, - Nikki Glaser: Bangin' 00:10
And we'll be in bed on like a Sunday morning,
'You're being weird.' - Nikki Glaser: Bangin' 00:10
'You're being weird.'
'Oh my God, I can't believe I'm moving to Fort Worth, like, this is insane.' " - Nikki Glaser: Bangin' 00:10
'Oh my God, I can't believe I'm moving to For...
And then, I'm in love with a guy who's not going to text me back, - Nikki Glaser: Bangin' 00:07
And then, I'm in love with a guy who's not going t...
And it sucks 'cause sex, now that that's off the table, - Nikki Glaser: Bangin' 00:07
And it sucks 'cause sex, now that that's off the t...
If I would hook up with the guy, I would go right from making out, - Nikki Glaser: Bangin' 00:12
If I would hook up with the guy, I would go right from makin...
I like doing things I'm good at. Girls like doing things they're good at. - Nikki Glaser: Bangin' 00:04
I like doing things I'm good at. Girls like doing thing...
I just am, and I know that's braggy, - Nikki Glaser: Bangin' 00:08
I just am, and I know that's braggy,
And as a whole, I think... - Nikki Glaser: Bangin' 00:04
And as a whole, I think...
As a whole as a hole, - Nikki Glaser: Bangin' 00:08
As a whole as a hole,
It's the easiest. I never understand when girls are like, - Nikki Glaser: Bangin' 00:08
It's the easiest. I never understand when girls are lik...
What's in it for you?" - Nikki Glaser: Bangin' 00:09
What's in it for you?"