Now, after some chitchat, getting-to-know-you kind of stuff, the thing l do so...

Gabrielle:
What's the story about? Richard:
lt's an action, suspense, romantic melodrama - with lots of comedy, of course. And deep down underneath a substrata of social comment. Gabrielle:
Oh. Well, if l could see the pages you've written, l could estimate the size of the typing job. Richard:
The pages, my dear girl, are right here. An Alexander Meyerheim production. [begins placing down blank sheets of paper] Richard:
"The Girl Who Stole the Eiffel Tower" - original story and screenplay by Richard Benson. Here, with a page or two of interestingly photographed establishing shots, possibly from a helicopter - a boy and a girl meet. Gabrielle:
But, Mr Benson... Richard:
Now, after some chitchat, getting-to-know-you kind of stuff, the thing l do so brilliantly, we feel an unconscious attraction between the two. An indication to the audience of the tremulous beginnings of love. And then, conflict! We can tell by the music how deeply fraught with danger the whole situation is. And now, the first switch. The audience *gasps* when they realise they've been fooled. Things are not what they seem. Not at all. ln fact, the whole situation is completely reversed, involving the *magnificently* ingenious switch on the switch. Amazed by the sudden turn of events, the boy and girl realise how gravely they've misjudged each other. At that moment, the music turns ominous once more. They become aware of the danger that they're in and the chase is on! Screaming tires, rooftops, long shots of their tiny figures racing through the empty, fear-gripped city. When suddenly in a deserted alley we see, seated on the closed-cover of a garbage can, licking its wet rain-bedraggled fur, close shot, the cat! Now, as we build step-by-step to the climax, the music soars! And there, totally oblivious of the torrential rain pouring down upon them, the two fall happily and tenderly into each other's arms. And as the audience drools with sublimated sexual pleasure, the two enormous and highly paid heads come together for that ultimate and inevitable moment. The final, earth-moving, studio-rent-paying, theatre-filling, popcorn-selling - kiss. Fade out. The End