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I acted on some inside information
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Patton Oswalt: We All Scream

I acted on some inside information, and I feel bad about this

I acted on some inside information, and I feel bad about this

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.336
I acted on some inside information,
00:00:03.419 --> 00:00:05.063
and I feel bad about this.
Duration
6 seconds
Views
20
Timestamp in Movie
00:24:59
Uploaded
Apr 29, 2025
Genres
documentary, comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

Oswalt discusses what happens to our bodies as we get older, who he could have been had he just followed the list he created during the lockdown, the Baby Boomer's last temper tantrum and much more.
Right when the vaccine came out, I have a friend, lives out in Riverside. - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:05
Right when the vaccine came out, I have a friend, lives out ...
And he calls me and says, "I don't know if I should tell you this, but, - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:23
And he calls me and says, "I don't know if I shoul...
I go, "Hi, excuse me. I'd like to get a vaccine." - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:08
I go, "Hi, excuse me. I'd like to get a vaccine.&q...
Like, "Yeah. Let me get you set up." Like, "Go stand over there." - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:04
Like, "Yeah. Let me get you set up." Like, "G...
While I'm waiting, my friend was right, everyone that walked in, - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:09
While I'm waiting, my friend was right, everyone that w...
"Yeah, no thanks." - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:29
"Yeah, no thanks."
In 1955, - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:06
In 1955,
We were two years away - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:05
We were two years away
And America could not have been more backward, racist, - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:13
And America could not have been more backward, racist,
"Give me that shot. I can't police these water fountains from a wheelchair." - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:13
"Give me that shot. I can't police these water fou...
Now - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:09
Now
Like you're watching a cheap science-fiction film, "In the year 2022..." - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:13
Like you're watching a cheap science-fiction film, &quo...
Half of the country's like, "That needle's got witch poison in it, I tells ya." - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:09
Half of the country's like, "That needle's go...
"Keep your wizard jab away from me." - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:10
"Keep your wizard jab away from me."
If that attitude had existed in 1955, - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:11
If that attitude had existed in 1955,
"Who do I gotta blow to cure polio?" Like little... - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:06
"Who do I gotta blow to cure polio?" Like little.....
That's right, jabby. Tell everyone about your benefits. - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:04
That's right, jabby. Tell everyone about your benefits.
"My benefits? Your fucking legs work. How's that for a benefit?" - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:08
"My benefits? Your fucking legs work. How's that f...
Cruise ships? Oh, you'll never see a cruise ship again. Kiss that goodbye. - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:04
Cruise ships? Oh, you'll never see a cruise ship again....
First off, every cruise ship is booked up to the year 2026. - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:06
First off, every cruise ship is booked up to the year 2026.