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Patton Oswalt: We All Scream

"Keep your wizard jab away from me." "I got to watch the videothat the Mars robot sent to...

"Keep your wizard jab away from me." "I got to watch the video
that the Mars robot sent to the world brain
I keep it in my pocket."

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:02.836
"Keep your wizard jab away from me."
00:00:02.919 --> 00:00:05.964
"I got to watch the video that the Mars robot
00:00:06.047 --> 00:00:08.883
sent to the world brain I keep it in my pocket."
Duration
10 seconds
Views
24
Timestamp in Movie
00:28:03
Uploaded
Apr 27, 2025
Genres
documentary, comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

Oswalt discusses what happens to our bodies as we get older, who he could have been had he just followed the list he created during the lockdown, the Baby Boomer's last temper tantrum and much more.
If that attitude had existed in 1955, - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:11
If that attitude had existed in 1955,
"Who do I gotta blow to cure polio?" Like little... - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:06
"Who do I gotta blow to cure polio?" Like little.....
That's right, jabby. Tell everyone about your benefits. - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:04
That's right, jabby. Tell everyone about your benefits.
"My benefits? Your fucking legs work. How's that for a benefit?" - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:08
"My benefits? Your fucking legs work. How's that f...
Cruise ships? Oh, you'll never see a cruise ship again. Kiss that goodbye. - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:04
Cruise ships? Oh, you'll never see a cruise ship again....
First off, every cruise ship is booked up to the year 2026. - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:06
First off, every cruise ship is booked up to the year 2026.
People cannot wait to get aboard the plague barge - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:07
People cannot wait to get aboard the plague barge
Not only are buffets gonna come back, - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:06
Not only are buffets gonna come back,
"Come on down to Captain Covid's Alpha Males Only buffet!" - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:05
"Come on down to Captain Covid's Alpha Males Only ...
"You the kind of left-wing soy boy - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:13
"You the kind of left-wing soy boy
"You show us proof you ain't been vaccinated, - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:10
"You show us proof you ain't been vaccinated,
I was listening to '70s on 7 on the way here. - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:05
I was listening to '70s on 7 on the way here.
Do you like '90s music? Guess what you hit. Number nine! - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:04
Do you like '90s music? Guess what you hit. Number nine...
Why did those three channels get moved - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:09
Why did those three channels get moved
'40s, '50s, '60s. Those listeners are dropping like... - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:05
'40s, '50s, '60s. Those listeners are droppin...
Three World War II veterans and a couple of contrarian hipsters. - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:04
Three World War II veterans and a couple of contrarian hipst...
And we can laugh and enjoy it, but hey, during our lifetimes, - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:08
And we can laugh and enjoy it, but hey, during our lifetimes...
That's how you can track how the generations are dying, - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:06
That's how you can track how the generations are dying,
I hope when they do that, - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:13
I hope when they do that,
You couldn't do "Patchouli Oil and Love Beads," or whatever? - Patton Oswalt: We All Scream 00:05
You couldn't do "Patchouli Oil and Love Beads,&quo...