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He can move and bend in ways your uniform does not allow!
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Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean

He can move and bend in waysyour uniform does not allow!" It never happened

He can move and bend in ways
your uniform does not allow!" It never happened

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:04.671
He can move and bend in ways your uniform does not allow!"
00:00:07.423 --> 00:00:09.676
It never happened.
Duration
10 seconds
Views
21
Timestamp in Movie
00:05:30
Uploaded
Jun 24, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
HBO

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Movie Summary

[HBO] HD. Pete Holmes stars in his second special for HBO, taped in front of a sold-out live audience at the Aladdin Theater in Portland, Oregon.
Mike Pence looks like a clear gummy bear, is that... - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:05
Mike Pence looks like a clear gummy bear, is that...
He looks like a clear gummy bear that kind of got his shit together. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:06
He looks like a clear gummy bear that kind of got his shit t...
You know what I mean? He bought a suit, like a human suit. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:05
You know what I mean? He bought a suit, like a human suit.
He learned how to tie a tie with his unformed gummy hands. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:05
He learned how to tie a tie with his unformed gummy hands.
He rehearsed in the mirror at home like, "Hello." - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:15
He rehearsed in the mirror at home like, "Hello."
My fucking pina colada gummy bear got all the way to Oval Office. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:06
My fucking pina colada gummy bear got all the way to Oval Of...
It's like he's a bad guy, but that's impressive for a candy. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:06
It's like he's a bad guy, but that's impressi...
"Please don't leave me in a hot car." - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:05
"Please don't leave me in a hot car."
Mike Pence said he doesn't wanna be left in the room alone - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:08
Mike Pence said he doesn't wanna be left in the room al...
If you laughed at that, you're gonna love this show. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:05
If you laughed at that, you're gonna love this show.
You picked the right night. You picked the right night. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:05
You picked the right night. You picked the right night.
My wife and I, this is exciting, we just had a baby, so we... - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:05
My wife and I, this is exciting, we just had a baby, so we.....
I'm so glad that you guys are baby positive. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:04
I'm so glad that you guys are baby positive.
I know, it's crazy, she just got here. Where was she? - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:05
I know, it's crazy, she just got here. Where was she?
I was sleeping next to my wife and consciousness flipped on in her belly, - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:07
I was sleeping next to my wife and consciousness flipped on ...
I've been talking about the baby on stage right when she was born, - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:19
I've been talking about the baby on stage right when sh...
Your life is over." - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:16
Your life is over."
I can't be 40, "I'm really looking forward to the new Joker movie." - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:09
I can't be 40, "I'm really looking forward to...
You sleep, you just sleep different. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:04
You sleep, you just sleep different.
You sleep in bursts. Sleep for, like, three hours and you're up for an hour, - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:09
You sleep in bursts. Sleep for, like, three hours and you�...