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It doesn't matter how fancy an invention Elon Musk makes
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Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean

It doesn't matter how fancy aninvention Elon Musk makes, he's still just one of these

It doesn't matter how fancy an
invention Elon Musk makes, he's still just one of these

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:04.042
It doesn't matter how fancy an invention Elon Musk makes,
00:00:04.503 --> 00:00:07.339
he's still just one of these.
Duration
7 seconds
Views
27
Timestamp in Movie
00:48:17
Uploaded
Jun 24, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
HBO

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Movie Summary

[HBO] HD. Pete Holmes stars in his second special for HBO, taped in front of a sold-out live audience at the Aladdin Theater in Portland, Oregon.
Does that make sense? He's stuck in one of these meat puppets? - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:06
Does that make sense? He's stuck in one of these meat p...
Just like you and me, just like a baboon. He's just a guy, - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:09
Just like you and me, just like a baboon. He's just a g...
He's working on impossible math to make a self-driving car - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:07
He's working on impossible math to make a self-driving ...
He just goes, "There's a rumble in my jumble." Like, he just feels... - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:05
He just goes, "There's a rumble in my jumble."...
Just like you and me, he just goes, "No, I've got to eat." - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:08
Just like you and me, he just goes, "No, I've got ...
A plate, just a level surface for his food, - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:21
A plate, just a level surface for his food,
He can't upgrade this, he just had to go, "Now wind activate." - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:10
He can't upgrade this, he just had to go, "Now win...
He swallows it like a fucking pelican because that's the best he can do. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:06
He swallows it like a fucking pelican because that's th...
When has to shit, he doesn't have a contact lens that goes, like, - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:12
When has to shit, he doesn't have a contact lens that g...
So he makes an excuse with his egghead friends, he's, like, - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:07
So he makes an excuse with his egghead friends, he's, l...
He has to go in a little room and squat on a bowl that's filled with water. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:05
He has to go in a little room and squat on a bowl that'...
That's the best we can do. That is the height of the technology. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:05
That's the best we can do. That is the height of the te...
It's a bowl filled with water and he squats like an ostrich in the Serengeti - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:19
It's a bowl filled with water and he squats like an ost...
And then when he thinks he's done and he's not always right... - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:05
And then when he thinks he's done and he's not alw...
When he thinks he's done, he gets paper, that's the best we have, - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:08
When he thinks he's done, he gets paper, that's th...
And he wipes his shitty ass and then he looks at it. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:05
And he wipes his shitty ass and then he looks at it.
Everyone here knows there's no better method than the wipe and the look. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:06
Everyone here knows there's no better method than the w...
The old wipe and look. He goes wipe, wipe, wipe, - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:13
The old wipe and look. He goes wipe, wipe, wipe,
Wipe, wipe, wipe, clean but I don't trust it. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:05
Wipe, wipe, wipe, clean but I don't trust it.
Wipe, wipe, wipe, "Whoa, good thing I didn't stop while I was ahead." - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:11
Wipe, wipe, wipe, "Whoa, good thing I didn't stop ...