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Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean

"Let's get the law involved."

"Let's get the law involved."

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:05.171
"Let's get the law involved."
Duration
5 seconds
Views
21
Timestamp in Movie
00:27:35
Uploaded
Jun 24, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
HBO

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Movie Summary

[HBO] HD. Pete Holmes stars in his second special for HBO, taped in front of a sold-out live audience at the Aladdin Theater in Portland, Oregon.
It's like we were playing tennis, but she didn't have a racket. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:04
It's like we were playing tennis, but she didn't h...
But she's good. She said yes even though I didn't say anything. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:05
But she's good. She said yes even though I didn't ...
She went, "Yeah, put the ring on." - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:06
She went, "Yeah, put the ring on."
I don't want him to judge me. I don't want him to be like, - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:07
I don't want him to judge me. I don't want him to ...
That's not what he said. This is 100% real. It's dead quiet in the balloon. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:06
That's not what he said. This is 100% real. It's d...
I just proposed, she said... Yeah, I didn't propose, but she said, yes. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:04
I just proposed, she said... Yeah, I didn't propose, bu...
What's the guy gonna say? He does two celebratory toots of the flame. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:05
What's the guy gonna say? He does two celebratory toots...
This is a 100% real, he goes, "Lot of girls up here, they say no." - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:06
This is a 100% real, he goes, "Lot of girls up here, th...
As if that wasn't bad enough, then he adds, - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:11
As if that wasn't bad enough, then he adds,
"Clever girl." - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:07
"Clever girl."
Don't Jurassic Park my engagement story. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:04
Don't Jurassic Park my engagement story.
Did you know the movie "Three Amigos" - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:08
Did you know the movie "Three Amigos"
What else can I tell you? I'm older. I like traffic. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:04
What else can I tell you? I'm older. I like traffic.
I'm not just doing material that fits my friendly face. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:04
I'm not just doing material that fits my friendly face.
You can imagine being in traffic and just looking at me and I'm like. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:06
You can imagine being in traffic and just looking at me and ...
- Yes. - Who cares? - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:04
- Yes. - Who cares?
Nothing is being asked of you. Just fucking remain. - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:05
Nothing is being asked of you. Just fucking remain.
I know I'm in the minority. I always look to my left, - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:12
I know I'm in the minority. I always look to my left,
Seriously, where are you headed, you stupid bitch? - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:05
Seriously, where are you headed, you stupid bitch?
You're like, "I'll be happy when I'm at work." - Pete Holmes: Dirty Clean 00:05
You're like, "I'll be happy when I'm at ...