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But if my life was really in danger
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Ralph Barbosa: Cowabunga

But if my life was really in danger, I don't need the bulletsto protect myself

But if my life was really in danger, I don't need the bullets
to protect myself

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:02.627
But if my life was really in danger,
00:00:02.071 --> 00:00:04.921
I don't need the bullets to protect myself.
Duration
6 seconds
Views
17
Timestamp in Movie
00:57:44
Uploaded
Apr 12, 2025
Genres
documentary, comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

Comedian Ralph Barbosa riffs on everything from his street-racing dream woman to his mom's lies about moon rocks in this chill, cheeky stand-up special.
I just need the gun itself to scare people off, - Ralph Barbosa: Cowabunga 00:06
I just need the gun itself to scare people off,
You know? Somebody'll run up on me like, "Give me your money!" - Ralph Barbosa: Cowabunga 00:15
You know? Somebody'll run up on me like, "Give me ...
He'll be like, "Keep your money and your dick, man. I'm sorry." - Ralph Barbosa: Cowabunga 00:07
He'll be like, "Keep your money and your dick, man...
[audience laughing] - Ralph Barbosa: Cowabunga 00:12
[audience laughing]
Like, I don't even mind getting profiled… - Ralph Barbosa: Cowabunga 00:06
Like, I don't even mind getting profiled…
[scattered chuckles] - Ralph Barbosa: Cowabunga 00:07
[scattered chuckles]
Like if somebody was to come up to me like, - Ralph Barbosa: Cowabunga 00:08
Like if somebody was to come up to me like,
I'd be like, "Damn, that's messed up. I don't even work hard." - Ralph Barbosa: Cowabunga 00:26
I'd be like, "Damn, that's messed up. I don&#...
I don't know. I… - Ralph Barbosa: Cowabunga 00:09
I don't know. I…
Like, when I was 13, me and my buddy Jaime went walking to a 7-Eleven gas station - Ralph Barbosa: Cowabunga 00:09
Like, when I was 13, me and my buddy Jaime went walking to a...
And when we got to the freezer, - Ralph Barbosa: Cowabunga 00:06
And when we got to the freezer,
It's, like, in this weird Downy toilet paper roll-looking… - Ralph Barbosa: Cowabunga 00:08
It's, like, in this weird Downy toilet paper roll-looki...
I was about to grab it, but my buddy Jaime and his long-ass fingers - Ralph Barbosa: Cowabunga 00:07
I was about to grab it, but my buddy Jaime and his long-ass ...
But right when he gripped it, - Ralph Barbosa: Cowabunga 00:10
But right when he gripped it,
This man, this cashier, he said to the woman cashier, - Ralph Barbosa: Cowabunga 00:14
This man, this cashier, he said to the woman cashier,
And my buddy Jaime let go of the ice cream, - Ralph Barbosa: Cowabunga 00:06
And my buddy Jaime let go of the ice cream,
[audience laughing] - Ralph Barbosa: Cowabunga 00:08
[audience laughing]
He looked at that cashier, - Ralph Barbosa: Cowabunga 00:28
He looked at that cashier,
He's like, "You don't have any right to talk to us like that." - Ralph Barbosa: Cowabunga 00:23
He's like, "You don't have any right to talk ...
They're like, "Hell, yeah. Tell his ass, kid. Tell him." - Ralph Barbosa: Cowabunga 00:10
They're like, "Hell, yeah. Tell his ass, kid. Tell...