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Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

The posse meet three cat clerics who worship Lister as their God. Lister vows to help them as they're being hunted by Rodon, the ruthless feral cat leader who has vowed to wipe out all cats who worship anyone but him.

Director

Doug Naylor

Year

Genre

Box Office

N/A

Production

Baby Cow Productions,Grant Naylor Productions

Awards

N/A

Homepage

https://dave.uktv.co.uk/shows/red-dwarf-the-promised-land/

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Rimmer

Lister

Cat

Danny John-Jules

Kryten

Robert Llewellyn

Holly

Rodon

Brother Sol

Count Ludo

Sister Luna

Mandeep Dhillon

Sister Peanut

Protector

Hayley-Marie Axe

Baby Cat

Charlotte Aldhouse

View All Cast

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Explore 435 Clips

And now we are protected
by our Holy Poppadom, - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

And now we are protected by our Holy Poppadom,

I'm...I'm more of a food
and dining services sort of aide... - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

I'm...I'm more of a food and dining services sort ...

Having trouble putting on a bow tie - - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Having trouble putting on a bow tie -

Yeah, not just normal salt,
like low-sodium sea salt. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Yeah, not just normal salt, like low-sodium sea salt.

Watch what happens now as they defy
the will of our Holy Poppadom. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Watch what happens now as they defy the will of our Holy Pop...

Let the Cat People witness
the consequences - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Let the Cat People witness the consequences

(ALL HISS) - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

We can only stab tofu
and processed meat substitutes! - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

We can only stab tofu and processed meat substitutes!

Ah, not so confident now, are you? - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Ah, not so confident now, are you?

(WEAPONS POWER U P) - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

(WEAPONS POWER U P)

(MEOW!) - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

(MEOW!) - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Arrghg - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

(EXPLOSION) - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

No, that's just fires. When you're on
disintegrating spaceships, no-one minds. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

No, that's just fires. When you're on disintegrati...

The Iron Star's disintegrating.
We've got to get out of the debris field! - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

The Iron Star's disintegrating. We've got to get o...

It's heat from the fuel tanks.
We're going to explode. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

It's heat from the fuel tanks. We're going to expl...

No choice.
Stand by for module separation. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

No choice. Stand by for module separation.

Excellent quick thinking, Listy.
just one question. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Excellent quick thinking, Listy. just one question.

How are you proposing to fly
what remains of the ship - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

How are you proposing to fly what remains of the ship

To be honest, I didn't have an amazing
amount of time - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

To be honest, I didn't have an amazing amount of time

I just thought at the time, "Ship's
on fire. Get rid of the fiery bit." - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

I just thought at the time, "Ship's on fire. Get r...

Unfortunately, we need to get past today
to get to tomorrow, - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Unfortunately, we need to get past today to get to tomorrow,

Heading for that desert moon
that's directly below us. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Heading for that desert moon that's directly below us.

How come you don't know? I thought
you were meant to be a major astro. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

How come you don't know? I thought you were meant to be...

- Oh, this is interesting.
- What? - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

- Oh, this is interesting. - What?

Apparently, the infotainment touch screen
has a pinch-to-zoom feature - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Apparently, the infotainment touch screen has a pinch-to-zoo...

"Landing." - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

"Launch parachute." - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

"Launch parachute."

Er, is the parachute that, er,
big shiny fluffy piece of material - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Er, is the parachute that, er, big shiny fluffy piece of mat...

You removed the emergency parachute
to make yourself a Puffa jacket? - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

You removed the emergency parachute to make yourself a Puffa...

Not just a Puffa.
I got a pair of mittens out of it, too! - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Not just a Puffa. I got a pair of mittens out of it, too!

It was silk.
What did you want me to do? - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

It was silk. What did you want me to do?

Relax, sirs, there's an emergency backup. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Relax, sirs, there's an emergency backup.

Is there? Or is the backup parachute
now hanging in your wardrobe - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Is there? Or is the backup parachute now hanging in your war...

(ALL GASP) - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

- Permission to go into apeshit mode.
- Permission granted. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

- Permission to go into apeshit mode. - Permission granted.

Oh, we've gotta take stock.
Food, water, fuel. What have we got? - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Oh, we've gotta take stock. Food, water, fuel. What hav...

My Alpha, I'm sorry to interrupt you
knocking things off a table, - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

My Alpha, I'm sorry to interrupt you knocking things of...

There's every reason to suspect
it is piloted by the humans. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

There's every reason to suspect it is piloted by the hu...

Also, worryingly, the Anubis Stone - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Also, worryingly, the Anubis Stone

So, after cleverlyjettisoning the engines
and all the ship's fuel, - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

So, after cleverlyjettisoning the engines and all the ship&#...

Look, there's no need to panic. I've been
in holes before and got out of it. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Look, there's no need to panic. I've been in holes...

Sorry to disturb you. We just wanted to
congratulate you on your expert landing. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Sorry to disturb you. We just wanted to congratulate you on ...

You know, when the ship was on fire,
some of us... - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

You know, when the ship was on fire, some of us...

...were starting to have doubts, - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

...were starting to have doubts,

Create another amazing miracle so we can
escape and find the promised land? - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Create another amazing miracle so we can escape and find the...

Got lots of ideas floating round
the almighty brain box. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Got lots of ideas floating round the almighty brain box.

Anyway, erm, I've gotta get on.
Anything else? - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Anyway, erm, I've gotta get on. Anything else?

Yeah, one question. Giving birth -
why did you make it hurt? - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Yeah, one question. Giving birth - why did you make it hurt?

And why did you make babies cry at night
rather than just during the day - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

And why did you make babies cry at night rather than just du...

And, erm, how come
we can't turn our head 360 degrees? - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

And, erm, how come we can't turn our head 360 degrees?

And-and-and male genitals -
did you... Did you run out of time? - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

And-and-and male genitals - did you... Did you run out of ti...

Look, all good questions,
terrific questions, - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Look, all good questions, terrific questions,

I've gotta save us, and then there's a
whole bunch of people I've gotta forgive, - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

I've gotta save us, and then there's a whole bunch...

If we crash-landed, perhaps
some of the Iron Star crash-landed too. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

If we crash-landed, perhaps some of the Iron Star crash-land...

- So?
- Well, so - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

- So? - Well, so

- Precisely.
- We're in two-thirds of a spaceship - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

- Precisely. - We're in two-thirds of a spaceship

Well, I'll... I'll read the owner's
manual, see if I can find anything. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Well, I'll... I'll read the owner's manual, s...

Don't tell me. The heated seats
have a massage function. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Don't tell me. The heated seats have a massage function...

(FAINTLY) # Lister, David Lister
Lister, Listy - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

(FAINTLY) # Lister, David Lister Lister, Listy

Remembering your history with women, - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Remembering your history with women,

Was said by no woman to you. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Was said by no woman to you.

As I'm a god, I forgive you for that. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

As I'm a god, I forgive you for that.

They're relying on me to pull
some supernatural wonder - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

They're relying on me to pull some supernatural wonder

If they knew the truth,
at least they'd stop depending on me - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

If they knew the truth, at least they'd stop depending ...

Dead because you didn't question
the order to repair - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Dead because you didn't question the order to repair

My body may be dead,
but my personality was resurrected - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

My body may be dead, but my personality was resurrected

And do you know why, out of
the entire crew, I was selected to return? - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

And do you know why, out of the entire crew, I was selected ...

Because I never think for myself,
I obey orders, and I always carry a pen. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Because I never think for myself, I obey orders, and I alway...

Yeah - straight through
the cremation curtain and into an urn. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Yeah - straight through the cremation curtain and into an ur...

It transformed my life - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

It transformed my life

I have some bad news.
I think you should all sit down. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

I have some bad news. I think you should all sit down.

You see, well, the thing is... - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

You see, well, the thing is...

(EMOTIONALLY) He's the most wonderful,
amazing man I've ever met! - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

(EMOTIONALLY) He's the most wonderful, amazing man I�...

After everything you've clone for me, sir,
I just couldn't. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

After everything you've clone for me, sir, I just could...

Er, last time, I told you Mr Lister was
the most wonderful, amazing man. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Er, last time, I told you Mr Lister was the most wonderful, ...

That's not quite the whole picture. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

That's not quite the whole picture.

In fact, he's staggeringly incredible
and stupendous too! - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

In fact, he's staggeringly incredible and stupendous to...

You tell them!
I'm hopeless at telling them. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

You tell them! I'm hopeless at telling them.

Did he not go into stasis
and save the mother of our people? - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Did he not go into stasis and save the mother of our people?

Did he not refuse to betray her
to the authorities and now we live? - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Did he not refuse to betray her to the authorities and now w...

And did he not give me the power of speech
when before I had no such gift? - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

And did he not give me the power of speech when before I had...

# David Lister - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

I was particularly proud of
one of the simulation scenarios - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

I was particularly proud of one of the simulation scenarios

Kryten, watch and learn! - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Kryten, watch and learn!

Right, you lot.
I'm cutting straight to the chase. - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Right, you lot. I'm cutting straight to the chase.

You've devoted your lives - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

You've devoted your lives

‘ Aarghg
" Argh! - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

‘ Aarghg " Argh!

Did you know the landing retros swivel - Red Dwarf: The Promised Land

Did you know the landing retros swivel

Red Dwarf: The Promised Land poster

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

The posse meet three cat clerics who worship Lister as their God. Lister vows to help them as they're being hunted by Rodon, the ruthless feral cat leader who has vowed to wipe out all cats who worship anyone but him.

User Rating: 0.0 (0 ratings)

Director: Doug Naylor

Writer: Rob Grant, Doug Naylor, Richard Naylor

Production: Baby Cow Productions,Grant Naylor Productions

Genre: comedy, sci-fi

Year: 2020

MetaScore: N/A/100

ImdbRating: 7.5

BoxOffice: N/A

Released: 09 Apr 2020

Awards: N/A

Homepage: https://dave.uktv.co.uk/shows/red-dwarf-the-promised-land/

Also watch: Military Wives, The Congress, Bean, Slumdog Millionaire, Interstellar, Tenet, Old Boy, Oppenheimer, Snowpiercer, Parasite, Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse, Joker, Black Swan, As Above, So Below, Me Before You, Green Book, The Sixth Sense, Knives Out