THIS IS A PIECE OF WOOD

Total of 10000 quotes, with This is a piece of wood in movies
 - 00:26

They stole my crucifix

Strange Cargo • 1940
Telez: Only God is good. Only God can forgive. They stole my crucifix, Cambreau. Without it, I'm lost. I'm afraid.
Cambreau: A crucifix is a piece of
 - 00:07

Evil is good and ass is good and if you get you a piece of evil ass

Maximillian: Evil is good and ass is good, and if you find you a piece of evil ass, WOO!
 - 00:09

Certainly in the topsy turvy world of heavy rock

Ian Faith: Certainly, in the topsy-turvy world of heavy rock, having a good solid piece of wood in your hand is often useful.
 - 00:07

I'm talking about mythology Mr Ipkiss

The Mask • 1994
Dr. Arthur Neuman: [Reffering to the mask, which Stanley brought in]
I'm talking about the mythology, Mr. Ipkiss. This is a piece of wood .
 - 00:15

I don't think we're going to be able to fix your phone

Jexi • 2019
Phil: Why not?
Denice: Well, because its in three different pieces! I don't even think this piece is part of your phone, it looks like a piece
 - 00:11

Good morning

Jaws 2 • 1978
Mrs. Taft: Good morning. Selling some more of the good life?
Ellen Brody: Oh, yeah... Piece of this, piece of that - it all adds up.
Mrs. Taft: Your husband's been here all morning. What's he doing?...
 - 00:12

I mean which one is you

Bruce Pandolfini: [sets each chess piece up]
Now, which one is you?
Josh Waitzkin: What do you mean?
Bruce Pandolfini: Which one is you?
Josh Waitzkin: They're just pieces.
Bruce Pandolfini: [plac...
 - 00:19

This one is beautiful

Cybil Waingrow: This looks Beautiful.
Murphy: It's one of my favorite pieces.
Cybil Waingrow: Yeah. Where's it from?
Murphy: [whispers]
Out my ass.
Cybil Waingrow: Excuse me.
Murphy: It's an Afri...
 - 00:28

This isn't the guy that jumped you in the theater, is it?

Blind Horizon • 2003
This isn't the guy that jumped
you in the theater, is it? Oh, gosh, no. Now, there's gotta be some reason
these guys want you out of the way. Frank, help me out here. You gotta start putting the piece...
 - 00:13

You know I would never bother you when you're getting a piece of wood

Mannequin • 1987
Hollywood Montrose: [to Jonathan]
You know I would never bother you when you're getting a piece
 - 00:12

Do you mind I just lost this whole piece of shit town

Diggstown • 1992
[Gillon just lost]

John Gillon: [to a man in his way]
Do you mind? I just lost this whole piece-of-shit town!
[someone takes his picture]

John Gillon: Now there's a picture worth about a WORD!
[gr...
 - 00:34

I have to pack

Pete: [attempting to teach Tad how to chop wood with an ax]
Ok... So... The trick is to take a full swing so as to as to split the log in one swift...
[Tad removes his shirt and reveals a muscular ch...
 - 00:17

Take a good look you worthless piece of human excrement

Mandy • 2018
Brother Swan: [Taunting Cage's bound character]
Take a good look, you worthless piece of human excrement! This is the tainted blade of the Pale Night, straight from the Abyssal Lair.
 - 00:37

Any last piece of advice Dad

Jessica Wood - Woody's Daughter:
Any last piece of advice, Dad?
Detective James Wood: The way I see it, you got a couple of choices here.
[Jessica laughs]

Priest: Who gives this woman to be joined ...
 - 00:19

Where is my suitcase Yeah Your suitcase In the trunk

Felix Ungar: Where's my suitcase?
Oscar Madison: Your suitcase? In the trunk.
Felix Ungar: No.
Oscar Madison: No?
Felix Ungar: No.
Oscar Madison: Did you look good?
Felix Ungar: [holds his arms ...
 - 00:05

Mmm this is good Did you try this

[Marty eats a piece of bread]

Marty Rossen: Mm, this is good. Have you tried it?
 - 00:30

I won't This is what it's all been about

Red Hood: This is what it's all been about. This! You, me, him! Now is the time you decide! If you won't kill this psychotic piece of filth, I will! If you want to stop me, you're going to have to kil...
 - 02:25

After the food is prepared

Polly: [She holds up the spoon she had been using to feed the baby]
Spoon!
David Merlin: B, take a spoonful of the food and place it upon a piece of gauze... Piece of gauze?
Polly: What for?
David Merlin: Uh, please, just do as he says. It's quite possible that man with 20 years experience might know what he's talking about.
 - 00:04

Is this a piece of your brain

Fawlty Towers • 1975 • Season 2 • Episode 1
Basil Fawlty: Is th is a piece of your brain?
 - 00:15

You see the brain itself feels no pain Clarice if that concerns you

Hannibal • 2001
Hannibal Lecter: You see, the brain itself feels no pain if that concerns you, Clarice. For example, Paul won't miss this little piece here, which is part of the pre-frontal lobe, which they say is th...
 - 00:06

What a piece of armor this is

Soldier: [stabbing at Ash's car]
What a piece of armor this is!
 - 00:12

But the line that separates good and evil

Immortality • 1998
Steven Grlscz: The line that separates good and evil cuts through every human heart. And who is willing to destroy a piece of their own heart?
 - 00:04

Time enough I think for a piece of wood

Monty Python's Flying Circus • 1969 • Season 1 • Episode 10
Vocational Guidance Counselloooor:
[just scared off a wannabe Lion-Tamer]
Time enough, I think, for a piece of wood!
 - 00:07

No more mail through this letterbox

No more mail through this letterbox!
[Harry opens the door to see Vernon drilling a piece of wood through the mail slot to stop any letters coming in]
 - 00:34

I used to know this kid

Joey Gazelle: You know... I used to know this kid. His old man was a real fucking piece of shit. Always drunk. Always smacking him and his mom around. This kid... he takes his licks and he waits this ...
 - 00:09

This is what happens when you get a gangster

Charles Coleman, Sr.: This is what happens when you get a gangster with a piece of silver on his chest
 - 00:24

I was tryin' to sneak some of this peanut brittle Mom made peanut brittle

What is that, peanut brittle?
Bob Collier: Yeah, your mother made some tonight for Thanksgiving. I thought I'd be clever and sneak a piece , when you just come in here and catch me.
Jeremy Collier: Well if it makes you feel any better, she probably counted all the pieces before she went to bed. She'll wake up, check on it.
 - 00:41

You have a donkey to sell

The Small One • 1978
Tanner: You have a donkey to sell?
Boy: [nervously]
His-his name is Small One.
Tanner: [inspecting Small One's hide]
One piece of silver.
Boy: Will you take good care of him?
Tanner: [sneers]
I on...
 - 00:29

They were scattered when he fell through the skylight

Chuck Lane: [during a litigation meeting]
We've read through all the pieces now, the entire staff, and we've come up with a list of those whose facts and sources we couldn't verify independently. I kn...
 - 00:10

Great party buddy

Project X • 2012
Rob: [as the riot police close in]
Nice party buddy.
[points to a flaming tree in his front yard]

Rob: You owe me a fucking tree!
Costa: All we were trying to do was have a good time you cocksuckin...
 - 00:05

This is Shepard Wong's home

High Macha Of Rashpur: [displaying a printed floor plan]
This is Shepherd Wong's home.
Phil Moscowitz: He lives in that piece of paper?
 - 00:26

Oh yes Yes yes yes This is a keeper Oi

Goldmember: [picking skin off his back]
Oh yesh. Yesh yesh yesh yesh. This is a keeper.
Dr. Evil: Alright, you're not going to put that skin in your mouth, are you?
Goldmember: [eats piece of skin]
...
 - 00:09

This place is gigantic

The Notebook • 2004
Young Allie: This place is gigantic!
Young Noah: Yeah, a gigantic piece of crap!
 - 00:05

Remind me to give that piece of wood a bonus

Cash: Remind me to give that piece of wood a bonus.
 - 00:15

Now call me a prude if you want but I don't think it's good policy for the navy

Rear Admiral Yancy Graham: Now, call me a prude if you want, but I don't think it's good policy for the Navy to hand over a billion-dollar piece of equipment to a man who has "Welcome Aboard" tattooed...
 - 00:43

THIS IS TOTALLY GAY WHAT

The Venture Bros. • 2004 • Season 1 • Episode 13
The Monarch: What? Think this is gay huh? Is that what you fucking said you scrawny peice of shit? Oh this isn't gay. But King Gorilla over there is! And I bet he can't wait to snap off a peice of you...
 - 00:08

This is an art gallery my friend

Unbreakable • 2000
Elijah Price: This is an art gallery, my friend, and this is a piece of art.
 - 00:08

This is not a sweet car

The Losers • 2010
Roque: This is not a sweet car, dawg.
Clay: This is a classic.
Roque: Yeah, this is a classic piece of shit.
 - 00:07

You understand why we ride a piece of wood

Mid90s • 2018
Fuckshit: That's why we ride a piece of wood, like, what that does to somebody's spirit.
 - 00:11

This rig is a piece of shit, isn'’t it? Yup.

Montana Story • 2022
This rig is a piece of shit, isn'’t it?
Yup. You mind?
 - 00:32

This is no smoking area

Monster • 2003
Restaurant Manager: [Selby is smoking at a restaurant]
This is a no-smoking area. You're gonna have to put the cigarette out.
Aileen: What are you doin, man, you gonna sing us a song or what?
Restau...
 - 00:10

I'll be at Julie Grendel's

Ford Fairlane: I'll be at Julie Grendel's. I want to see if he knows what a hoo-er thief his ex piece-of-shit wife is.
 - 00:09

Sister you tell this piece of S word that I will personally F word him up

Dominic Toretto: [Hands over the microchip to Hobbs]
So this is worth billions.
Hobbs: [Smiles]
Name your price, Dom.
[Long pause]

Dominic Toretto: [Referring to his old address in Los Angeles]
132...
 - 00:29

Please allow me to introduce myself

Everly • 2014
[pokes the man with his sharp cane]

The Masochist: I am a piece
 - 00:15

Why not Nobody wants to see this piece of shit

Ed Wood • 1994
Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Nobody wants to see this piece of shit!
Edward D. Wood, Jr.: Hey, you can't talk that way about my movie!
 - 00:32

This is the life

Lloyd Christmas: This is the life... cold beer, a hot tub and paper-thin walls. There's only one thing that could make this moment any better.
Harry Dunne: What's that?
Lloyd Christmas: If you had a...
 - 00:31

It's amazing

Jacques: It's amazing how broccoli always makes you fart. In a way, broccoli is the embodiment of fart. If you could capture a piece
 - 00:08

I was impressed when they opened the World Trade Center

[on Mr. Nicholas' "size"]

Rick Gassko: Personally, I was impressed when they opened the World Trade Center, but this, this is a piece of work.
 - 00:56

Ex Irish assassin

Dr. Evil: [Dr. Evil is introducing his henchmen]
Patty O'Brien: ex-Irish assassin. His trademark?
[Patty O'Brien is shown wearing a bracelet with trinkets on it]

Dr. Evil: A superstitious man, he le...
 - 00:05

What's going on Is this some sort of interactive theater art piece

Hot Rod • 2007
Rod Kimble: What's going on? Is this some sort of interactive theatre art piece?
 - 00:14

Oh yes That old thing is taking quite a bit of time

Spectre • 2015
[Bond notices the shell of the DB5]

Q: Oh, yes. That old thing is taking quite a bit of time. Mind you, there wasn't much left to work, only a steering wheel. I believe I said, "Bring it back in one ...
 - 00:09

A good cop can't sleep because a piece of the puzzle's missing

Insomnia • 2002
Ellie Burr: A good cop can't sleep because he's missing a piece of the puzzle. And a bad cop can't sleep because his conscience won't let him.
 - 00:09

I adore a piece of wood its feel

Home Improvement Voiceover #1 - Woman:
I adore a piece of wood. It's feel. I hope I always get a kick from the feel of a length of wood.
 - 00:31

You guys ready to leave?

Making the Cut • 2020 • Season 1 • Episode 5
[Rinat] You guys ready to leave? [Sabato] So many pieces you did. I gave her one, but I gave her a full piece
from beginning to end. [ Sabato laughs ] Fantastic. I mean, I'm an idiot, I'll tell you th...
 - 00:31

I thought this was a democracy

The Majestic • 2001
Leo Kubelsky: The Declaration of Independence, the Constitution, they're all just pieces of paper with signatures on them. And you know what a piece
 - 00:12

Marvelous technology

Dr. Soran: [inspecting Geordi's VISOR]
Marvelous technology. This is a remarkable piece of equipment.
Geordi: [sarcastic]
Glad you approve.
 - 00:08

I mean if you place an object in a museum

The Square • 2017
Christian: If you place an object in a museum does that make this object a piece of art?
 - 00:50

What've you got there

Elsa: What've you got there?
Jeremy: The Gutenberg Bible. It was in the Rare Books Room.
Elsa: Think God's gonna save you?
Jeremy: No. I don't believe in God.
Elsa: You're holding on to that Bible...
 - 00:30

This thing you got

Gill: [at night, Gill and Rae are in the front-seat of his pickup truck; Rae is totally drunk and about to pass out]
This thing you got... I've heard people say you'd fuck a tree if it was handy. I ca...
 - 00:36

I said how's about we all go on a stickup

Joe: How's about we all go on a stick-up? It's foolproof. If it works, we'll be in great shape. If not, maybe they'll give us three years. Maybe. That would be free room and board, and when we get out...
 - 00:33

That was pretty good

Jerry Maguire • 1996
Marcee Tidwell: [shouting at Jerry in his office]
What do you stand for?
Dorothy: How about a little piece of integrity in this world that is so full of greed and a lack of honorability that I don't ...
 - 00:35

That's right And some women don't want to give up the big piece of chicken

Chris Rock: What does daddy get for his hard work? The big piece of chicken at dinner! My mamma would kill us if one of us ate the big piece of chicken by accident!
[Pretending to be his mamma]

Chri...
 - 00:20

It seems quite a poisonous element has entered our little home.

Extras • 2005 • Season 1 • Episode 4
It seems quite a poisonous element
has entered our little home. -Quite a nasty little piece of work.
-Can I just say... I think you should go,
you have done quite enough damage. This is daft... It's h...
 - 00:17

Honey What

Robots • 2005
Mrs. Copperbottom: Honey?
Mr. Copperbottom: What?
Mrs. Copperbottom: What's that extr a piece ?
Mr. Copperbottom: Oh. Oh, no, they always put in an extra...
[Takes a good look at the piece]
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