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I can't trust anyone in this motherfucker.
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Sam Jay: 3 in the Morning

I can't trust anyonein this motherfucker." 'Cause parents like to present itlike they got...

I can't trust anyone
in this motherfucker." 'Cause parents like to present it
like they got everything together

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.252
I can't trust anyone in this motherfucker."
00:00:04.001 --> 00:00:06.063
'Cause parents like to present it like they got everything together.
Duration
7 seconds
Views
26
Timestamp in Movie
00:58:45
Uploaded
Jun 04, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

Comedian and "Saturday Night Live" writer Sam Jay serves up fresh takes on relationships, travel nightmares, the audacity of white people and more.
That's the problem. Don't lie. Stop coming like you got everything-- - Sam Jay: 3 in the Morning 00:07
That's the problem. Don't lie. Stop coming like yo...
Sometimes, I'm not gonna be able to, so look out for yourself, little nigga. - Sam Jay: 3 in the Morning 00:04
Sometimes, I'm not gonna be able to, so look out for yo...
-And let's-- let's rock out." -[cheering] - Sam Jay: 3 in the Morning 00:08
-And let's-- let's rock out." -[cheering]
But, no, parents, "I got everything under control." - Sam Jay: 3 in the Morning 00:05
But, no, parents, "I got everything under control."...
I remember I heard my mom and my dad - Sam Jay: 3 in the Morning 00:06
I remember I heard my mom and my dad
She was tryin' to have a whisper-fight with the nigga, but you can't whisper - Sam Jay: 3 in the Morning 00:05
She was tryin' to have a whisper-fight with the nigga, ...
So, my mom's whisperin', and then my dad goes, - Sam Jay: 3 in the Morning 00:08
So, my mom's whisperin', and then my dad goes,
Now you're just tryin' to identify witnesses. Are they credible? - Sam Jay: 3 in the Morning 00:04
Now you're just tryin' to identify witnesses. Are ...
Are they not credible? But you fucking did it! - Sam Jay: 3 in the Morning 00:05
Are they not credible? But you fucking did it!
[laughs] - Sam Jay: 3 in the Morning 00:08
[laughs]
These little niggas is like, "All I got is these walkie-talkies and these bikes. - Sam Jay: 3 in the Morning 00:05
These little niggas is like, "All I got is these walkie...
They're my best friends. 'Cause that bitch can't handle shit." - Sam Jay: 3 in the Morning 00:14
They're my best friends. 'Cause that bitch can...
I was like, "Aliens are comin' to get my ass." - Sam Jay: 3 in the Morning 00:07
I was like, "Aliens are comin' to get my ass."...
It was huge. It was big shit. It was. - Sam Jay: 3 in the Morning 00:04
It was huge. It was big shit. It was.
There was Outer Limits, there was X-Files, - Sam Jay: 3 in the Morning 00:13
There was Outer Limits, there was X-Files,
Just throw a whole curveball at your ass. "What? They could've built the pyramids?" - Sam Jay: 3 in the Morning 00:11
Just throw a whole curveball at your ass. "What? They c...
And I got in the shower one day, and I felt my leg pulsate a little bit. - Sam Jay: 3 in the Morning 00:04
And I got in the shower one day, and I felt my leg pulsate a...
I was like, "That's the tracker. That's where them niggas is gon'-- - Sam Jay: 3 in the Morning 00:11
I was like, "That's the tracker. That's where...
"Waah!" Watchin' Last Dragon and shit. "Eeh! Eeh! Ugh!" - Sam Jay: 3 in the Morning 00:09
"Waah!" Watchin' Last Dragon and shit. "...
Every night, sleeping with a knife and hammer under my pillow, - Sam Jay: 3 in the Morning 00:05
Every night, sleeping with a knife and hammer under my pillo...