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If I don't teach you anything else today
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Scare Package

If I don't teach youanything else today, you're gonna learn your ABCs

If I don't teach you
anything else today, you're gonna learn your ABCs

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:02.344
If I don't teach you anything else today,
00:00:02.368 --> 00:00:05.304
you're gonna learn your ABCs.
Duration
5 seconds
Views
37
Timestamp in Movie
00:27:25
Uploaded
Jun 13, 2025
Genres
comedy, drama, fantasy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

Chad, the owner of Rad Chad's Horror Emporium, recounts a series of bone-chilling, blood-splattered tales to illustrate the rules of the horror genre to his newest employee.
Okay? You got to keep the mood in here alive, all right? - Scare Package 00:05
Okay? You got to keep the mood in here alive, all right?
So like a video deejay. - Scare Package 00:04
So like a video deejay.
This is what disappointment looks like. - Scare Package 00:04
This is what disappointment looks like.
You know, that is very true. - Scare Package 00:05
You know, that is very true.
Blood is thicker than water. - Scare Package 00:04
Blood is thicker than water.
Uh, you know, - Scare Package 00:07
Uh, you know,
You need to start making some real contributions - Scare Package 00:05
You need to start making some real contributions
I'm doing all the sacrificing around here. - Scare Package 00:04
I'm doing all the sacrificing around here.
We are pure, carnal instincts! - Scare Package 00:05
We are pure, carnal instincts!
Fantasy leagues, - Scare Package 00:07
Fantasy leagues,
You see that? We should be reacting, not cowering. - Scare Package 00:04
You see that? We should be reacting, not cowering.
We roll over, and we beg, - Scare Package 00:08
We roll over, and we beg,
We heel to be good boys. - Scare Package 00:05
We heel to be good boys.
We obey when we hear - Scare Package 00:05
We obey when we hear
The muzzle of oppression is keeping us from being - Scare Package 00:07
The muzzle of oppression is keeping us from being
We're gonna take it back, - Scare Package 00:05
We're gonna take it back,
Right for the jugular. - Scare Package 00:04
Right for the jugular.
If I want to wear boat shoes to her uncle's funeral, - Scare Package 00:04
If I want to wear boat shoes to her uncle's funeral,
If Billy Joel can write "Storm Front" while wasted, - Scare Package 00:05
If Billy Joel can write "Storm Front" while wasted...
I downloaded that pic of the babysitter - Scare Package 00:08
I downloaded that pic of the babysitter