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Schulz Saves America

Comedian Andrew Schulz takes on the year's most divisive topics in this fearlessly unfiltered and irreverent four-part special.

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Conspiracy mouth breathers, - Schulz Saves America

Conspiracy mouth breathers,

Rich, as of recently.
Successful, on YouTube. - Schulz Saves America

Rich, as of recently. Successful, on YouTube.

Flag-fondling fascists
and cucked-out communists, - Schulz Saves America

Flag-fondling fascists and cucked-out communists,

This year, we had an election more divided
than a Dallas drinking fountain. - Schulz Saves America

This year, we had an election more divided than a Dallas dri...

Right now I could be
slurping Shirley Temples - Schulz Saves America

Right now I could be slurping Shirley Temples

According to the internet, corona wasn't
the only thing keeping kids captive. - Schulz Saves America

According to the internet, corona wasn't the only thing...

From Black Lives Matter
to circumcised super-spreaders, - Schulz Saves America

From Black Lives Matter to circumcised super-spreaders,

We were given the privilege and honor - Schulz Saves America

We were given the privilege and honor

It's 2020 and conspiracy theories
have gone mainstream. - Schulz Saves America

It's 2020 and conspiracy theories have gone mainstream.

And ultimately, this rhythmless
versus battle had one victor. - Schulz Saves America

And ultimately, this rhythmless versus battle had one victor...

Coronavirus, you lung-lynching
globe fucker! - Schulz Saves America

Coronavirus, you lung-lynching globe fucker!

I'm not talking about Sasquatch
or the Chupacabra, - Schulz Saves America

I'm not talking about Sasquatch or the Chupacabra,

2020 has been
unparalleled in social progress. - Schulz Saves America

2020 has been unparalleled in social progress.

Botox Biden was going back
to the White House - Schulz Saves America

Botox Biden was going back to the White House

This year, the 'rona rocked us
harder than a nanny with Parkinson's, - Schulz Saves America

This year, the 'rona rocked us harder than a nanny with...

And by social progress I mean
posting black squares on Instagram. - Schulz Saves America

And by social progress I mean posting black squares on Insta...

So if we're gonna talk activism
like a random stop-and-frisk, - Schulz Saves America

So if we're gonna talk activism like a random stop-and-...

I'm talking about pedophile pizza,
Plandemic, paid protesters. - Schulz Saves America

I'm talking about pedophile pizza, Plandemic, paid prot...

Over the next few months, - Schulz Saves America

Over the next few months,

Well, both sides handled it - Schulz Saves America

Well, both sides handled it

We need to talk about the biggest
threat to Black lives in this nation. - Schulz Saves America

We need to talk about the biggest threat to Black lives in t...

White-on-Black crime,
and I don't mean refined sugar. - Schulz Saves America

White-on-Black crime, and I don't mean refined sugar.

I said "hailstorm." - Schulz Saves America

I said "hailstorm."

Remember back in the day, - Schulz Saves America

Remember back in the day,

The pink-haired pronoun parade - Schulz Saves America

The pink-haired pronoun parade

I'm talking about uniformed militants - Schulz Saves America

I'm talking about uniformed militants

Now, you just need a Facebook friend - Schulz Saves America

Now, you just need a Facebook friend

People on the extremes, shut the fuck up! - Schulz Saves America

People on the extremes, shut the fuck up!

Every day on Instagram, - Schulz Saves America

Every day on Instagram,

Ever since the old steamed dump lung - Schulz Saves America

Ever since the old steamed dump lung

We saw this Botox Becky, - Schulz Saves America

We saw this Botox Becky,

You know the people who hammered Hillary
for not conceding on election night? - Schulz Saves America

You know the people who hammered Hillary for not conceding o...

Well, to this day,
they're still flying their losing flags - Schulz Saves America

Well, to this day, they're still flying their losing fl...

But from the looks of the birdbath
in my belly button, - Schulz Saves America

But from the looks of the birdbath in my belly button,

The stay-at-home, locked-down loyalists - Schulz Saves America

The stay-at-home, locked-down loyalists

And then there was Kroger Karen
who bison-blocked a Black family - Schulz Saves America

And then there was Kroger Karen who bison-blocked a Black fa...

So I think it's safe to say - Schulz Saves America

So I think it's safe to say

Just take the "L"
like those "theys" did to get home. - Schulz Saves America

Just take the "L" like those "theys" did...

They call anyone
that ventures outside a grandma murderer. - Schulz Saves America

They call anyone that ventures outside a grandma murderer.

Ironically, "Bye, son" is the last thing
she'll say when she loses custody. - Schulz Saves America

Ironically, "Bye, son" is the last thing she'...

Now, by the looks of things, - Schulz Saves America

Now, by the looks of things,

Listen up. The only person
that murdered your grandma - Schulz Saves America

Listen up. The only person that murdered your grandma

And most importantly,
the queen of all Karens, - Schulz Saves America

And most importantly, the queen of all Karens,

I mean, the streets are filled
with white-on-white violence - Schulz Saves America

I mean, the streets are filled with white-on-white violence

You probably haven't
thought about her Emmett Till now, - Schulz Saves America

You probably haven't thought about her Emmett Till now,

Apparently, all cops are bastards,
except Kamala, - Schulz Saves America

Apparently, all cops are bastards, except Kamala,

We've all encountered some conspiracy - Schulz Saves America

We've all encountered some conspiracy

I said "mask debaters." - Schulz Saves America

I said "mask debaters."

The morning of May 25th, Central Park,
a Black man, an avid birdwatcher, - Schulz Saves America

The morning of May 25th, Central Park, a Black man, an avid ...

But what we're wondering
about these theories is - Schulz Saves America

But what we're wondering about these theories is

I mean, if you're staring at screens, - Schulz Saves America

I mean, if you're staring at screens,

These are the same dipshits that say, - Schulz Saves America

These are the same dipshits that say,

He pulled a Carole Baskin
and asked Amy to leash her bitch, - Schulz Saves America

He pulled a Carole Baskin and asked Amy to leash her bitch,

So when I hear that Bill Clinton
is cracking out the cast of Cuties, - Schulz Saves America

So when I hear that Bill Clinton is cracking out the cast of...

And as soon as a minimum-wage employee
asks them to put a mask on, - Schulz Saves America

And as soon as a minimum-wage employee asks them to put a ma...

Or as Hillary would say,
"A job well done." - Schulz Saves America

Or as Hillary would say, "A job well done."

And if anyone
should understand eating fish… - Schulz Saves America

And if anyone should understand eating fish…

What? You felt threatened by this guy?
A Black man with a bicycle helmet? - Schulz Saves America

What? You felt threatened by this guy? A Black man with a bi...

I mean, I'm from New York, - Schulz Saves America

I mean, I'm from New York,

But trying to couch-commando corona
doesn't help anything. - Schulz Saves America

But trying to couch-commando corona doesn't help anythi...

But I still can't stop watching
these fucking YouTube videos - Schulz Saves America

But I still can't stop watching these fucking YouTube v...

Also, I got a question
for you, Fro-yo Baggins, - Schulz Saves America

Also, I got a question for you, Fro-yo Baggins,

You're not an expert
because you watch Plandemic - Schulz Saves America

You're not an expert because you watch Plandemic

Senegalese bag boys are still selling
fake YSLs to fake DSLs. - Schulz Saves America

Senegalese bag boys are still selling fake YSLs to fake DSLs...

Why would he want to hurt your dog?
He's a birdwatcher, not a falcon. - Schulz Saves America

Why would he want to hurt your dog? He's a birdwatcher,...

Now, for the rest of us, - Schulz Saves America

Now, for the rest of us,

Thankfully, this dogfight in the park - Schulz Saves America

Thankfully, this dogfight in the park

And I know these seem far-fetched, - Schulz Saves America

And I know these seem far-fetched,

But, the media won't show you that - Schulz Saves America

But, the media won't show you that

But literally the same day, - Schulz Saves America

But literally the same day,

No, not Dan Bilzerian,
usually he's with fake tens, - Schulz Saves America

No, not Dan Bilzerian, usually he's with fake tens,

So let's go back 100 years to this March, - Schulz Saves America

So let's go back 100 years to this March,

Nothing is more profitable than conflict. - Schulz Saves America

Nothing is more profitable than conflict.

Until the game is on, - Schulz Saves America

Until the game is on,

And he was murdered in broad daylight
by four active police officers. - Schulz Saves America

And he was murdered in broad daylight by four active police ...

The fact is, the Jews-- - Schulz Saves America

The fact is, the Jews--

Everyone agrees this was
a horrific act of police brutality. - Schulz Saves America

Everyone agrees this was a horrific act of police brutality.

"They pay off the refs." - Schulz Saves America

"They pay off the refs."

Even back in the day
when there were only three channels - Schulz Saves America

Even back in the day when there were only three channels

I mean, the French were wining, - Schulz Saves America

I mean, the French were wining,

The day after Floyd's killing, - Schulz Saves America

The day after Floyd's killing,

The networks played to the middle - Schulz Saves America

The networks played to the middle

Black people were tired of being targets,
and tired of Targets in general. - Schulz Saves America

Black people were tired of being targets, and tired of Targe...

Point is, we all believe
in some conspiracy. - Schulz Saves America

Point is, we all believe in some conspiracy.

We saw protesters across the country - Schulz Saves America

We saw protesters across the country

Then, with the introduction of cable,
the media landscape changed. - Schulz Saves America

Then, with the introduction of cable, the media landscape ch...

And news channels popped up
like Eddie Murphy watching Juwanna Mann. - Schulz Saves America

And news channels popped up like Eddie Murphy watching Juwan...

It made a big splash on our shores, - Schulz Saves America

It made a big splash on our shores,

We saw everything from peaceful protesting
to rabid rioting and luxurious looting. - Schulz Saves America

We saw everything from peaceful protesting to rabid rioting ...

Speaking of control, we're all trying
to make sense of the world around us. - Schulz Saves America

Speaking of control, we're all trying to make sense of ...

Schulz Saves America poster

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Comedian Andrew Schulz takes on the year's most divisive topics in this fearlessly unfiltered and irreverent four-part special.

User Rating: 0.0 (0 ratings)

Director: N/A

Writer: N/A

Production:

Genre: comedy

Year: 2020

MetaScore: N/A/100

ImdbRating: 7.3

BoxOffice:

Released: 17 Dec 2020

Awards: N/A

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