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"Small Soldiers" quotes

Small Soldiers poster
When missile technology is used to enhance toy action figures, the toys soon begin to take their battle programming too seriously.

Director: Joe Dante
Writer: Gavin Scott, Adam Rifkin, Ted Elliott
Production: N/A
Genre: action, adventure, comedy
Year: 1998
MetaScore: N/A/100
ImdbRating: 6.2
BoxOffice: $54,682,547
Released: 10 Jul 1998
Awards: 3 wins & 4 nominations

51 video clips

Gwendy DollChristy FimpleIrwin WayfairChip HazardJoeTimmy FimpleGil MarsLarry BensonPhil FimpleArcherRalph, Clean Room TechnicianPunch-itStuart AbernathyBradInsaniacBrick BazookaLink StaticButch MeathookNick NitroIrene Abernathy
Nick Nitro's battery has run out - Small Soldiers 00:18 Nick Nitro's battery has run out There will be no mercy - Small Soldiers 00:12 There will be no mercy He's not supposed to be here now - Small Soldiers 01:31 He's not supposed to be here now I love the smell of polyurethane in the morning - Small Soldiers 00:06 I love the smell of polyurethane in the morning A mind is a terrible thing to waste - Small Soldiers 00:05 A mind is a terrible thing to waste You've got a lot of guts Let's see what they look like - Small Soldiers 00:07 You've got a lot of guts Let's see what they look... It's a small world after all - Small Soldiers 00:05 It's a small world after all I think World War ll was my favorite war - Small Soldiers 00:06 I think World War ll was my favorite war Are you scared - Small Soldiers 00:11 Are you scared We can't have toys out on the market that may be dangerous - Small Soldiers 00:37 We can't have toys out on the market that may be... How's this slogan The Commando Elite Anything else is just a toy - Small Soldiers 00:06 How's this slogan The Commando Elite Anything else is... The chips - Small Soldiers 00:30 The chips Soldiers no poor sap ever won a war by dying for his country - Small Soldiers 00:35 Soldiers no poor sap ever won a war by dying for his country Greetings I am Archer emissary of the Gorgonites - Small Soldiers 00:10 Greetings I am Archer emissary of the Gorgonites Alan friend of Archer - Small Soldiers 00:19 Alan friend of Archer We shouldn't fight We should hide - Small Soldiers 00:11 We shouldn't fight We should hide What are you looking for Gorgon - Small Soldiers 00:22 What are you looking for Gorgon Besides what are you worried about They're only toys - Small Soldiers 00:06 Besides what are you worried about They're only toys Major Chip Hazard - Small Soldiers 00:37 Major Chip Hazard What is your name I'm Alan Now shut up - Small Soldiers 00:12 What is your name I'm Alan Now shut up All my make up is cruelty free - Small Soldiers 00:06 All my make up is cruelty free If you can't accessorize pulverize - Small Soldiers 00:05 If you can't accessorize pulverize Damn the torpedoes or give me death - Small Soldiers 00:05 Damn the torpedoes or give me death Excuse me Did you say learn Learn Learn yeah - Small Soldiers 00:07 Excuse me Did you say learn Learn Learn yeah An officer and a gentleman does't strike a lady What - Small Soldiers 00:06 An officer and a gentleman does't strike a lady What Let's see if her head comes off - Small Soldiers 00:05 Let's see if her head comes off Any sign of the Gorgonites No none of them - Small Soldiers 00:24 Any sign of the Gorgonites No none of them Great all we need now is a nuclear warhead - Small Soldiers 00:21 Great all we need now is a nuclear warhead We have met the enemy and he is you - Small Soldiers 00:05 We have met the enemy and he is you You Maggot - Small Soldiers 00:08 You Maggot You rescued me - Small Soldiers 00:13 You rescued me You've been a bad boy Now you must be punished - Small Soldiers 00:07 You've been a bad boy Now you must be punished Gorgonites we must help Alan But if we fight we will lose - Small Soldiers 00:17 Gorgonites we must help Alan But if we fight we will lose Just because you can't see it doesn't mean it doesn't exist - Small Soldiers 00:07 Just because you can't see it doesn't mean it... She's got a baton - Small Soldiers 00:08 She's got a baton Seven Gorgonites and nine people - Small Soldiers 00:08 Seven Gorgonites and nine people They're not in the storeroom they're not here - Small Soldiers 00:04 They're not in the storeroom they're not here Did I overpluck my eyebrows - Small Soldiers 00:04 Did I overpluck my eyebrows Nick Nitro's battery has run out - Small Soldiers 00:09 Nick Nitro's battery has run out If it lacerates or detonates - Small Soldiers 00:08 If it lacerates or detonates Damn potholes - Small Soldiers 00:04 Damn potholes How to Make a Success of Your Small Buisness - Small Soldiers 00:14 How to Make a Success of Your Small Buisness If you don't shut up - Small Soldiers 00:16 If you don't shut up And what do soldiers need - Small Soldiers 00:06 And what do soldiers need I'm hit - Small Soldiers 00:11 I'm hit Tell us what we want to know - Small Soldiers 00:42 Tell us what we want to know Give me that That's mine punk - Small Soldiers 00:41 Give me that That's mine punk

Cast

Irwin Wayfair - David Cross
Larry Benson - Jay Mohr
Ms. Kegel - Alexandra Wilson
Gil Mars - Denis Leary
Alan Abernathy - Gregory Smith
All Cast