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Small Town Killers

Two Danish BFFs have lost interest in their wives and consider divorce, but end up getting drunk and hiring a Russian hitman online instead. The Russian flies in. Unfortunately, their wives get to know the Russian as well.

Director

Ole Bornedal

Year

Genre

comedy, crime, drama

Box Office

N/A

Production

N/A

Awards

1 win & 3 nominations total

Cast information not available.

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Explore 624 Clips

If only they'd never existed. - Small Town Killers

If only they'd never existed.

It would be so much easier to get
divorced if they weren't there. - Small Town Killers

It would be so much easier to get divorced if they weren...

You don't have to give half
of everything to someone - - Small Town Killers

You don't have to give half of everything to someone -

- Do you know what you're saying?
- Yes! No... - Small Town Killers

- Do you know what you're saying? - Yes! No...

- How about we hire a hitman?
- Yes. - Small Town Killers

- How about we hire a hitman? - Yes.

- From the east. From Russia.
- Yes! - Small Town Killers

- From the east. From Russia. - Yes!

They're sick in the head.
And they're broke. - Small Town Killers

They're sick in the head. And they're broke.

Wham bang thank you ma'am. - Small Town Killers

Wham bang thank you ma'am.

Yeah, a guy from the East. - Small Town Killers

Yeah, a guy from the East.

Hello.
Hi, Edward. So you're awake? - Small Town Killers

Hello. Hi, Edward. So you're awake?

No, he's been asleep for 48 hours.
Or maybe he's dead. I didn't check. - Small Town Killers

No, he's been asleep for 48 hours. Or maybe he's d...

- You hired a Russian hitman!
- I was drunk! - Small Town Killers

- You hired a Russian hitman! - I was drunk!

So was I, but I didn't hire
a goddamn Russian hitman! - Small Town Killers

So was I, but I didn't hire a goddamn Russian hitman!

Shit! You're gonna have
to call it off. It's as simple as that. - Small Town Killers

Shit! You're gonna have to call it off. It's as si...

I told you already, I tried.
The link expired. - Small Town Killers

I told you already, I tried. The link expired.

You pay half, and the link expires.
That's the deal when you hire a hitman. - Small Town Killers

You pay half, and the link expires. That's the deal whe...

All that's left is this.
Igor Lad... whatever. - Small Town Killers

All that's left is this. Igor Lad... whatever.

Arrival from Kiev 2:45 p.m. - Small Town Killers

Arrival from Kiev 2:45 p.m.

He's on his way?! - Small Town Killers

He's on his way?!

Maybe he won't recognize us.
All he knows is that we live in Nibe - - Small Town Killers

Maybe he won't recognize us. All he knows is that we li...

There are people living in Nibe
in all kinds of houses. - Small Town Killers

There are people living in Nibe in all kinds of houses.

But he's got the email address
and the name. - Small Town Killers

But he's got the email address and the name.

He knows exactly where to go.
He's a professional killer, lb. - Small Town Killers

He knows exactly where to go. He's a professional kille...

I've got it. Let's go to the airport
and tell him it's a misunderstanding. - Small Town Killers

I've got it. Let's go to the airport and tell him ...

Good idea. We'll give him a decent tip
and say it's all a misunderstanding. - Small Town Killers

Good idea. We'll give him a decent tip and say it'...

- What if 100 dollars isn't enough?
- Hell, it's a year's income in Russia. - Small Town Killers

- What if 100 dollars isn't enough? - Hell, it's a...

- Got the return ticket?
- Yup. Moscow 6:45 p.m. - Small Town Killers

- Got the return ticket? - Yup. Moscow 6:45 p.m.

- Good. And then this never happened.
- It already never happened. - Small Town Killers

- Good. And then this never happened. - It already never hap...

We'll treat him to a steak
and a couple of bottles of Rioja - - Small Town Killers

We'll treat him to a steak and a couple of bottles of R...

I'll give him that.
Impressive. - Small Town Killers

I'll give him that. Impressive.

My friends...
My friends. - Small Town Killers

My friends... My friends.

- Is he a friend of yours?
- Nah, we don't really know him. - Small Town Killers

- Is he a friend of yours? - Nah, we don't really know ...

- Then why are you holding his name?
- Well... - Small Town Killers

- Then why are you holding his name? - Well...

- What's his business here?
- We're builders. - Small Town Killers

- What's his business here? - We're builders.

- Igor's here to help us... build.
- Nothing illegal. - Small Town Killers

- Igor's here to help us... build. - Nothing illegal.

But we don't need him after all,
so we've bought him a return ticket. - Small Town Killers

But we don't need him after all, so we've bought h...

No way.
He's not flying in that state. - Small Town Killers

No way. He's not flying in that state.

Get him out of here.
Immediately! - Small Town Killers

Get him out of here. Immediately!

We'll take a taxi to the Scandic.
We won't draw attention in a taxi. - Small Town Killers

We'll take a taxi to the Scandic. We won't draw at...

We'll get him a room, pour
some coffee on him to sober him up - - Small Town Killers

We'll get him a room, pour some coffee on him to sober ...

Your friend is okay, right?
He can't puke in my taxi... - Small Town Killers

Your friend is okay, right? He can't puke in my taxi...

He's from Russia.
They hardly ever puke. - Small Town Killers

He's from Russia. They hardly ever puke.

Godless pig eater,
drunk, foolish dog! - Small Town Killers

Godless pig eater, drunk, foolish dog!

I curse you to hell - - Small Town Killers

I curse you to hell -

I curse you and your family
and hope you burn in hell. - Small Town Killers

I curse you and your family and hope you burn in hell.

I'm going to pull out your intestines
through your filthy throat - - Small Town Killers

I'm going to pull out your intestines through your filt...

Damn you! I'm going to do that to you,
you filthy shit-for-brains! - Small Town Killers

Damn you! I'm going to do that to you, you filthy shit-...

You son of a bitch! I'm going
to kill you, you crazy bastard! - Small Town Killers

You son of a bitch! I'm going to kill you, you crazy ba...

- Stop the car!
- What stop?! Where stop?! - Small Town Killers

- Stop the car! - What stop?! Where stop?!

I'll kill you good! We kicked
your entire family out of your country! - Small Town Killers

I'll kill you good! We kicked your entire family out of...

I can't deal with all that negative
energy in such a confined space. - Small Town Killers

I can't deal with all that negative energy in such a co...

So much... hatred
between people, Edward. - Small Town Killers

So much... hatred between people, Edward.

We're going to sober him up,
and then we're going home. - Small Town Killers

We're going to sober him up, and then we're going ...

Well, let's get... going. - Small Town Killers

Well, let's get... going.

Besides, he don't care.
He wasn't happy. - Small Town Killers

Besides, he don't care. He wasn't happy.

Now, I promise he's much happier now
with his 72 fucking virgins. - Small Town Killers

Now, I promise he's much happier now with his 72 fuckin...

Now he's happier.
Now he's with his virgins. I'm sorry. - Small Town Killers

Now he's happier. Now he's with his virgins. I...

For fuck's sake.
lb, this isn't happening, is it? - Small Town Killers

For fuck's sake. lb, this isn't happening, is it?

We're going to jail on account of a
drunk Russian that we don't even know. - Small Town Killers

We're going to jail on account of a drunk Russian that ...

Edward, we have to take him home with
us. And we can't just leave the body. - Small Town Killers

Edward, we have to take him home with us. And we can't ...

- Someone's gonna find him.
- Someone? - Small Town Killers

- Someone's gonna find him. - Someone?

That poor immigrant guy and his
immigrant kids who are now fatherless. - Small Town Killers

That poor immigrant guy and his immigrant kids who are now f...

Maybe he's a fucking ISIS who whips
his family with the Quran every night. - Small Town Killers

Maybe he's a fucking ISIS who whips his family with the...

But you don't know that!
Prejudice... bah! - Small Town Killers

But you don't know that! Prejudice... bah!

Well, Igor, let's go. - Small Town Killers

Well, Igor, let's go.

- Let's go get a beer at the inn.
- But what if the girls come home? - Small Town Killers

- Let's go get a beer at the inn. - But what if the gir...

Are there any real men left? - Small Town Killers

Are there any real men left?

I really want a child. - Small Town Killers

I really want a child.

I'm going on 40, and my ovaries
are beginning to look like prunes. - Small Town Killers

I'm going on 40, and my ovaries are beginning to look l...

- I thought we were going to my place.
- You never have any wine. - Small Town Killers

- I thought we were going to my place. - You never have any ...

Oh, come on.
We're gonna have a ball! - Small Town Killers

Oh, come on. We're gonna have a ball!

You'll meet other men who look you
in the eye instead of ogling your ass. - Small Town Killers

You'll meet other men who look you in the eye instead o...

Who can dance, think and go
to the art museum and watch PBS - - Small Town Killers

Who can dance, think and go to the art museum and watch PBS ...

- Is this the reception?
- Is he one of their Poles? - Small Town Killers

- Is this the reception? - Is he one of their Poles?

- Where is the mini bar?
- How dare he prance in like that? - Small Town Killers

- Where is the mini bar? - How dare he prance in like that?

They stay in the cellar from time
to time, but they never come upstairs. - Small Town Killers

They stay in the cellar from time to time, but they never co...

Life is nothing without beauty and love.
Love is what makes you happy - - Small Town Killers

Life is nothing without beauty and love. Love is what makes ...

So when Igor meets two beautiful women,
he sees lots of love - - Small Town Killers

So when Igor meets two beautiful women, he sees lots of love...

And I do not say that because I'm drunk. - Small Town Killers

And I do not say that because I'm drunk.

Igor is always drunk
and sees ugly women all the time. - Small Town Killers

Igor is always drunk and sees ugly women all the time.

But you are very, very,
very beautiful. - Small Town Killers

But you are very, very, very beautiful.

Who says you can leave your cellar? - Small Town Killers

Who says you can leave your cellar?

You are like a juicy wet oasis. An oasis
just waiting to feed a thirsty man - - Small Town Killers

You are like a juicy wet oasis. An oasis just waiting to fee...

And you, beautiful.
Like a painting by Da Vinci. - Small Town Killers

And you, beautiful. Like a painting by Da Vinci.

Where is your man to see
your secret smile, beautiful lips? - Small Town Killers

Where is your man to see your secret smile, beautiful lips?

I like it very much.
Beautiful. - Small Town Killers

I like it very much. Beautiful.

- Well, Malte, our dance teacher...
- Dance teacher? - Small Town Killers

- Well, Malte, our dance teacher... - Dance teacher?

He thinks we are very passionate.
He's a Swede. - Small Town Killers

He thinks we are very passionate. He's a Swede.

Gay, of course, and sometimes
he compares us to two tulips. - Small Town Killers

Gay, of course, and sometimes he compares us to two tulips.

You tulips? But tulip is nothing
but the stupid vegetable. - Small Town Killers

You tulips? But tulip is nothing but the stupid vegetable.

Small Town Killers poster

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

Two Danish BFFs have lost interest in their wives and consider divorce, but end up getting drunk and hiring a Russian hitman online instead. The Russian flies in. Unfortunately, their wives get to know the Russian as well.

User Rating: 0.0 (0 ratings)

Director: Ole Bornedal

Writer: Ole Bornedal

Production: N/A

Genre: comedy, crime, drama

Year: 2017

MetaScore: N/A/100

ImdbRating: 5.3

BoxOffice: N/A

Released: 12 Jan 2017

Awards: 1 win & 3 nominations total

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