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and pay him to give a lap dance to Simon Schama
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Stewart Lee: Content Provider

And pay him to give a lap danceto Simon Schama

and pay him to give a lap dance
to Simon Schama

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:04.201
..and pay him to give a lap dance to Simon Schama.
Duration
4 seconds
Views
25
Timestamp in Movie
01:15:14
Uploaded
Jun 26, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
BBC Comedy,Awkward Films

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Movie Summary

Stewart Lee's 2017/18 touring stand-up show, recorded live at the Palace Theatre, Southend-on-Sea, in April 2018.
"It's not like that, mate, if you actually watch Game Of..." - Stewart Lee: Content Provider 00:07
"It's not like that, mate, if you actually watch G...
And I shall never watch Game Of Thrones. - Stewart Lee: Content Provider 00:04
And I shall never watch Game Of Thrones.
I copied that off the back of a cup in HMV. - Stewart Lee: Content Provider 00:05
I copied that off the back of a cup in HMV.
And everything I need to know to do an hour of stand-up - Stewart Lee: Content Provider 00:08
And everything I need to know to do an hour of stand-up
"It's not like that, have you actually watched..." - Stewart Lee: Content Provider 00:05
"It's not like that, have you actually watched...&...
If I want to understand the ongoing collapse of ancient dynasties, - Stewart Lee: Content Provider 00:07
If I want to understand the ongoing collapse of ancient dyna...
..I'll read Tolstoy's War And Peace while sitting over the wheel arch - Stewart Lee: Content Provider 00:07
..I'll read Tolstoy's War And Peace while sitting ...
Some of the older supporters of the theatre going, yeah, - Stewart Lee: Content Provider 00:06
Some of the older supporters of the theatre going, yeah,
Hey, I've got a joke for you now, Southend. - Stewart Lee: Content Provider 00:04
Hey, I've got a joke for you now, Southend.
Hey, I tell you what, you may laugh, madam - - Stewart Lee: Content Provider 00:06
Hey, I tell you what, you may laugh, madam -
It was the 1970s, it was a different time. - Stewart Lee: Content Provider 00:04
It was the 1970s, it was a different time.
It was a time of innocence and fun and laughter. - Stewart Lee: Content Provider 00:04
It was a time of innocence and fun and laughter.
So, I've got a joke for you, it's a Game Of Thrones joke. - Stewart Lee: Content Provider 00:05
So, I've got a joke for you, it's a Game Of Throne...
You may laugh, sir - if you were my son, I'd still be bathing you. - Stewart Lee: Content Provider 00:04
You may laugh, sir - if you were my son, I'd still be b...
Get in the bath, get out of the bath, dry yourself off, - Stewart Lee: Content Provider 00:06
Get in the bath, get out of the bath, dry yourself off,
There's people up there going, "Oh, now it's picked up. - Stewart Lee: Content Provider 00:04
There's people up there going, "Oh, now it's ...
"A proper comedian's come on." - Stewart Lee: Content Provider 00:08
"A proper comedian's come on."
You may laugh, sir - if you were dead, I'd still be bathing you. - Stewart Lee: Content Provider 00:04
You may laugh, sir - if you were dead, I'd still be bat...
"Is he dead?" "Yes, but he's clean." "Oh." - Stewart Lee: Content Provider 00:07
"Is he dead?" "Yes, but he's...
I've got a joke for you now, it's a Game Of Thrones joke. - Stewart Lee: Content Provider 00:05
I've got a joke for you now, it's a Game Of Throne...