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I didn't know that IKEA made people
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Suicide for Beginners

I didn't know Ikea made people

[Randy hears screams every time he shoots his nail gun into a bookcase]
Randy:
I didn't know Ikea made people

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.935
I didn't know that IKEA made people
Duration
4 seconds
Views
227
Timestamp in Movie
01:10:56
Uploaded
May 12, 2025
Genres
comedy, horror
Production
Inspire Productions,207 Pictures,Chaotic Panda Entertainment,Hank and Jed Movie Pictures

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Movie Summary

Writing the perfect suicide note isn't easy. Murdering a garage full of people is also pretty hard. But getting your victims to like you while you kill them, that's the really tricky part.

Actors

Corey Feldman
Randy
Corey Feldman
That wasn't cool. - Suicide for Beginners 00:04
That wasn't cool.
No. No! - Suicide for Beginners 00:05
No. No!
I wanted to tell you, just before you die, - Suicide for Beginners 00:09
I wanted to tell you, just before you die,
'Cause other people, they probably didn't, - Suicide for Beginners 00:04
'Cause other people, they probably didn't,
I hope you know you're a murderer. - Suicide for Beginners 00:04
I hope you know you're a murderer.
You know, still, I forgive you. - Suicide for Beginners 00:05
You know, still, I forgive you.
Why? You wanted a monster? - Suicide for Beginners 00:04
Why? You wanted a monster?
Oh, uh, you um, killed your boyfriend, by the way. - Suicide for Beginners 00:04
Oh, uh, you um, killed your boyfriend, by the way.
It's right here on page two. - Suicide for Beginners 00:06
It's right here on page two.
"It was just a lover's quarrel that got out of hand," - Suicide for Beginners 00:07
"It was just a lover's quarrel that got out of han...
"I didn't mean to brain him to death - Suicide for Beginners 00:09
"I didn't mean to brain him to death
But I totally did, and now he's dead and it's all my fault." - Suicide for Beginners 00:07
But I totally did, and now he's dead and it's all ...
Anyway, I told you that you're the crazy one. - Suicide for Beginners 00:04
Anyway, I told you that you're the crazy one.
I thought we were in love. - Suicide for Beginners 00:04
I thought we were in love.
I'm gonna need your John Hancock on this, - Suicide for Beginners 00:07
I'm gonna need your John Hancock on this,
Okay, well you just killed the girl that won't stop crying. - Suicide for Beginners 00:05
Okay, well you just killed the girl that won't stop cry...
Don't worry, Poodle. He's not gonna kill you. - Suicide for Beginners 00:04
Don't worry, Poodle. He's not gonna kill you.
If he were a newspaper, - Suicide for Beginners 00:09
If he were a newspaper,
Probably you just found 'em dead and brought 'em in here. - Suicide for Beginners 00:04
Probably you just found 'em dead and brought 'em i...
I once knew a guy, died while performing CPR on an old lady. - Suicide for Beginners 00:06
I once knew a guy, died while performing CPR on an old lady.