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Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis

I'm like, "Yeah, me too,every week in therapy." He's like, "I called your bluff,...

I'm like, "Yeah, me too,
every week in therapy." He's like, "I called your bluff, though,
didn't I?

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:04.067
I'm like, "Yeah, me too, every week in therapy."
00:00:05.796 --> 00:00:08.716
He's like, "I called your bluff, though, didn't I?
Duration
9 seconds
Views
28
Timestamp in Movie
00:52:57
Uploaded
Jun 01, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

She's halfway through her 20s, and she's over it. Too old to party, too young to settle down, comedian Taylor Tomlinson takes aim at her life choices.
Look who's not dead, drama queen." - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:04
Look who's not dead, drama queen."
[stilted laughter] - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:05
[stilted laughter]
She was spanking me in the church parking lot - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:06
She was spanking me in the church parking lot
So she's cleansing her soul, a little pre-communion, - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:18
So she's cleansing her soul, a little pre-communion,
Well, then, we're going to have to make it hurt." - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:08
Well, then, we're going to have to make it hurt."
She went Martha Stewart on my ass. I still cannot watch the Food Network. - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:05
She went Martha Stewart on my ass. I still cannot watch the ...
But I never talked back again. You try to spank a kid now, - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:05
But I never talked back again. You try to spank a kid now,
They'll be bent over on the iPhone you pay for, - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:05
They'll be bent over on the iPhone you pay for,
"Really? You're going to go through with this, even though Psychology Today - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:08
"Really? You're going to go through with this, eve...
All right, Eileen, you stupid bitch. You do what you got to do. - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:04
All right, Eileen, you stupid bitch. You do what you got to ...
I'll be down here playing Angry Birds and googling how you live with yourself." - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:09
I'll be down here playing Angry Birds and googling how ...
"How dare you address me directly? Avert your eyes. - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:04
"How dare you address me directly? Avert your eyes.
I'm like, "Who gave you an accent?" - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:09
I'm like, "Who gave you an accent?"
That's how we should introduce them. "These are my people, Rhonda and Tim. - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:05
That's how we should introduce them. "These are my...
He had four daughters, which means he was just like playing dick goalie and... - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:06
He had four daughters, which means he was just like playing ...
His biggest fear was that one of us - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:09
His biggest fear was that one of us
Can't take this back to Best Buy. "I've spilled some stuff on it." - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:08
Can't take this back to Best Buy. "I've spill...
I would hate to be the father of four daughters. It seems very stressful. - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:04
I would hate to be the father of four daughters. It seems ve...
She had lingerie delivered to my parents' house once - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:05
She had lingerie delivered to my parents' house once
And my dad opened the box because he's a middle-aged man who pays the mortgage, - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:07
And my dad opened the box because he's a middle-aged ma...