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Just dump me in the river. Don't introduce yourself, Jeff
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Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis

Just dump me in the river.Don't introduce yourself, Jeff

Just dump me in the river.
Don't introduce yourself, Jeff

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:04.042
Just dump me in the river. Don't introduce yourself, Jeff.
Duration
4 seconds
Views
31
Timestamp in Movie
00:01:51
Uploaded
Jun 01, 2025
Genres
comedy
Production
N/A

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Movie Summary

She's halfway through her 20s, and she's over it. Too old to party, too young to settle down, comedian Taylor Tomlinson takes aim at her life choices.
I am halfway through my 20s, and I am done with this shit. - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:05
I am halfway through my 20s, and I am done with this shit.
They're not fun. They are ten years of asking yourself, - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:12
They're not fun. They are ten years of asking yourself,
I had a woman come up to me after a show furious. She's like, - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:09
I had a woman come up to me after a show furious. She's...
I'm like, "Where are your kids buried? Holy shit." - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:09
I'm like, "Where are your kids buried? Holy shit.&...
If you're sitting there going, "Taylor, you should be grateful. I miss my 20s." - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:11
If you're sitting there going, "Taylor, you should...
But do you remember why nobody expected anything from you? - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:05
But do you remember why nobody expected anything from you?
That's what everybody forgets about your 20s. You were garbage. - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:04
That's what everybody forgets about your 20s. You were ...
You have no intuition, no instincts. You can't make decisions, only mistakes. - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:06
You have no intuition, no instincts. You can't make dec...
You don't have a gut to listen to yet. - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:04
You don't have a gut to listen to yet.
There's no mystic bad feeling under your ribs going, - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:05
There's no mystic bad feeling under your ribs going,
I'm like, "What can I bring to the potluck, Nana?" - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:05
I'm like, "What can I bring to the potluck, Nana?&...
And if they say Starbucks on them, I swear to God, Taylor... - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:04
And if they say Starbucks on them, I swear to God, Taylor...
You have to work on yourself in your 20s 'cause if you don't, then you'll turn 30, - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:09
You have to work on yourself in your 20s 'cause if you ...
Your 20s are an opportunity to fish trash out of the lake before it freezes over. - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:06
Your 20s are an opportunity to fish trash out of the lake be...
Daddy issues? All right. Better get all that out of there - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:06
Daddy issues? All right. Better get all that out of there
You have one in your mouth, you feel pretty cool, but everyone is like, - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:05
You have one in your mouth, you feel pretty cool, but everyo...
Don't do that around my kids." - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:11
Don't do that around my kids."
I'm trying to be a better partner too. I haven't always been a great partner. - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:04
I'm trying to be a better partner too. I haven't a...
I was the girl you couldn't bring home for holidays - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:09
I was the girl you couldn't bring home for holidays
Sorry, if you love me, you wouldn't even do it up here. Like... - Taylor Tomlinson: Quarter-Life Crisis 00:04
Sorry, if you love me, you wouldn't even do it up here....