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We don't wanna take any chances
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Right. You see the thing is, we don't wanna take any chances, because the stakes are so...

Ted 22015
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Ted: Right. You see the thing is, we don't wanna take any chances, because the stakes are so significant. John: We can't rush into anything. We got to make sure we're making the right decision. Ted: We really appreciate your time, but what we're probably gonna do is... [Samantha takes a hit from bong] Ted: just take a seat and get to work. John: Trust you completely. Ted: We really feel you got a lot to offer. Samantha Jackson: Sorry you don't mind the pot,do you? I get migraines. John: Oh absolutely. Me too. Ted: That's fine. I'm gonna get a huge migraine in the parking lot in about 20 minuets.


Transcript

Ted has already lost his job, his marriage has been annulled. I know, My uncle gave me all the details. Right, You see, the thing is, we don't want to take any chances because the stakes are so significant. We can't just rush into anything. We got to make sure we're making the right decision. We really appreciate your time, but I think what we're probably gonna do is just take a seat and get to work. Trust you completely. Yeah, we really feel like you got a lot to offer. Sorry. You don't mind the pot, do you? I get migraines. Oh, absolutely, me, too. That's fine. I'm gonna get a huge migraine in the parking lot in about 20 minutes. Oh, I'm Samantha Jackson. Ted, How are ya? Good to meet you, John. Nice to meet you. Wait, wait, wait. What's your middle name? Leslie. Oh, my God! So you're Sam L. Jackson! That's fucking great! Just like Sam L. Jackson! Who is that? You ever seen any movie ever? He's the black guy. That weed is really good. It reminds me of the strain I smoked last summer called "Here Comes Autism. Yeah, I was just gonna say it's sort of like this other batch we had called "How Long Has That Van Been There? No, it's this new strain my dealer gave me called Help Me Get Home. You know, I'm surprised a lawyer like you gets high. I mean, aren't you supposed to be fighting the War on Drugs and all that shit? Please, the War on Drugs is a joke. It's just a way for the government to inflate law enforcement budgets and lock up minorities for no good legal reason. And you, my friend, are an oppressed minority. Yeah, No shit. They've denied you the same rights as everybody else just because you're different, and I say that's a violation of the Constitution. So what do you say? Can you get me my life back? I'm gonna try. Hey, guys?

Clip duration: 96 seconds
Views: 225
Timestamp in movie: 00h 00m 00s
Uploaded: 01 February, 2021
Genres: comedy
Summary: Newlywed couple Ted and Tami-Lynn want to have a baby, but in order to qualify to be a parent, Ted will have to prove he's a person in a court of law.


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