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Ted

John Bennett, a man whose childhood wish of bringing his teddy bear to life came true, now must decide between keeping the relationship with the bear, Ted or his girlfriend, Lori.

Director

Seth MacFarlane

Year

Genre

Box Office

$218,815,487

Production

Universal Pictures,MRC,Fuzzy Door Productions,Bluegrass Films,Smart Entertainment

Awards

Nominated for 1 Oscar. 13 wins & 28 nominations total

Homepage

https://www.uphe.com/movies/ted

Part of Collection

Ted Collection: Ted, Ted 2

John Bennett

Lori Collins

Ted

Seth MacFarlane

Rex

Donny

Giovanni Ribisi

Guy

Patrick Warburton

Thomas

Tami-Lynn

Robert

Frank

Bill Smitrovich

Narrator

Patrick Stewart

Norah Jones

Sam Jones

Tom Skerritt

Young John

John's Dad

John's Mom

Alix

Tanya

Laura Vandervoort

Asian Man 'Ming'

Gina

Tracy

Michelle

Greenbaum Kid

Kid #1

Kid #2

Kid #3

Heavenly

Kristina Ellery

Cherene

Angelique

Sauvignon Blanc

Waitress

Guy at Table #1

Guy at Table #2

Guy in Line

Guy #1

Guy #2

Partygoer (Ted's Buddy)

Girl at Party

Teenage John

Plymouth PR Worker

Viera Andrea Moya

Club Girl

Ellen

Crazy Guy

Stagehand

Waiter

Newscaster

Female Newscaster

Southern Newscaster

Husband

Johnny Lee Davenport

Wife

Wedding Guest

Kermin

Christy Alcroft

Rock Star Party Guest

Party Chick

Norah Jones Concert Audience

Christian Alvarado

Concert Attendee

Emmalyn Anderson

Tourist

Concertgoer

Lilith Astaroth

Pedestrian

Jacqueline Astbury

Club goer

Jamie Lea Babineau

Patron Ballgame

Girl Feeding Waterfowl

Party Guest

Business Executive

Marshall Berenson

Liberty Mechanic

Pretty Party Girl

Karaoke Lounge Patron

Pedestrian

Hot Girl

Self

Flower Girl

Madison Dae Clarion

Photographer

Jeffrey Corazzini

Dance Scene

Club Patron

Alexandra Creteau

Ted Danson

Restaurant Patron

Richard DeAgazio

Karaoke Girl

Party Goer

Extra

Club Patron

Vinicio Kahdiak Eduardo

Wedding guest

Fraternity Girl

Jackie B. Fabian

Doorman

Wedding Guest

PR Firm Employee

Man at Concert

Tourist

Boy at Aquarium

Alexander 'Alex' Garde

Concert Attendee

Sophia Gilberto

Party Guest

Man At Concert

Car Rental Patron

Concert Goer

Donny's Dad

Pedestrian at Irish Pub

Rosemary Howard

Concert Attendee

Tourist

Frankie Imbergamo

Nightclub Manager

Party Guest

Concert Attendee

Restaurant Patron

SpongeBob SquarePants

Concert Attendee

Extra

Store Shopper

Party Goer

PR Employee

Kathy LaShay Berenson

Ted's Party Guest

Bar Patron

Concert Attendee

Concert Attendee

Concert Attendee

Roadie

OnStage Security

Christopher J. Long

Irishman Arguing Outside Pub

Concert Attendee

Business Woman

Mini Golf Player

Wedding Guest

Wedding Guest

On Stage Security - Boston Hatch Shell

Party Goer

Self

Party Guest

Wayne R. Miller

Star Wars Movie Attendee

Wedding Guest

City Girl

Party Goer

patron

Club Girl

Roxanne Nichols

Club Patron

Party Guest

Concert Goer

Japanese Newscaster

Man in the Common

Richard Pacheco

Wedding Guest

Concert Patron

Airport Patron

Concert Guest

Party Guest

Roadie

Karaoke Singer #2

Stacey Queripel

Wedding Patron

Donna Glee Reim

Concert Attendee

Jared

Party Guest

Jessica Rockwood

Self

Pedestrian

Manajhjanihe Royalle

Party Goer

Concert Attendee

Girl at the Bar

Party Goer

Nightclub Patron

Matthew Spinale

Hotel Pianist

Club Dancer 2

Bellybutton

Homeless Man

David Struffolino

Extra

Shannon Elaine Sweeney

Dad at Christmas

Clubber

Party Guest

Cute Girl Groped by Ted

Grocery Walker

Party Guest

Concert Attendee

Club Patron

Jamie Christopher White

Office Worker Party Guest

Rock Concert Attendee

View All Cast

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Explore 108 Clips

Tami-lynn Ted Lori Collins Narrator John Bennett Frank Robert Donny Norah Jones Tom Skerritt Sam J. Jones Ted Danson Rex Guy Ellen Southern Newscaster Guy #1 Guy #2 Thomas Jared Bellybutton Young John John's Mom John's Dad

I'm always fascinated to meet Ted's girlfriends - Ted

I'm always fascinated to meet Ted's girlfriends

Not looking up your towel - Ted

Not looking up your towel

And for little John bennet, christams
day brought a very special new arrival. - Ted

And for little John bennet, christams day brought a very spe...

NARRATOR Now if there's one thing you can be sure of - Ted

NARRATOR Now if there's one thing you can be sure of

Teddy... - Ted

Mom Dad guess what My teddy bear's alive - Ted

Mom Dad guess what My teddy bear's alive

Look what Jesus did Look what Jesus did Look what Jesus did - Ted

Look what Jesus did Look what Jesus did Look what Jesus did

I thought you were going to be funnier - Ted

I thought you were going to be funnier

No matter how big a splash you make in this world - Ted

No matter how big a splash you make in this world

Look all I'm saying is that Boston women are on the whole - Ted

Look all I'm saying is that Boston women are on the...

- Fuck.
- Aww, shit. - Ted

- Fuck. - Aww, shit.

I don't know that you want to go to a drug dealer with complaints - Ted

I don't know that you want to go to a drug dealer with...

MAN Asshole - Ted

GUY You guys have been going out for four years - Ted

GUY You guys have been going out for four years

Well we've been dating four years tomorrow - Ted

Well we've been dating four years tomorrow

I don't understand - Ted

I don't understand

TED Hey Lori can you set the alarm for 11 00 A M - Ted

TED Hey Lori can you set the alarm for 11 00 A M

This song is so great - Ted

This song is so great

Alright... whatever you say - Ted

Alright... whatever you say

Okay here's a test to see how much you actually care about me - Ted

Okay here's a test to see how much you actually care...

Oh yeah Chris Brown can do no wrong - Ted

Oh yeah Chris Brown can do no wrong

Oh shit, hang on a second - Ted

Oh shit, hang on a second

Is that a new ringtone? - Ted

Is that a new ringtone?

Can you call it - Ted

Can you call it

I love my sixpence Better than my life - Ted

I love my sixpence Better than my life

Lori hey you're home early - Ted

Lori hey you're home early

There is a shit on my floor - Ted

There is a shit on my floor

Plus a hooker took a shit in our apartment - Ted

Plus a hooker took a shit in our apartment

I look stupid - Ted

I don't I look like Snuggle's accountant - Ted

I don't I look like Snuggle's accountant

So you think you got what it takes - Ted

So you think you got what it takes

Well I guess this is it huh? - Ted

Well I guess this is it huh?

I have to say I've been following you ever since I was a young boy - Ted

I have to say I've been following you ever since I was...

Stand up straight when you're talking to me - Ted

Stand up straight when you're talking to me

All right look let's just find a better place to get stoned - Ted

All right look let's just find a better place to get...

Ohh... is that a Flash Gordon ray
gun, or are you just ahppy to see me? - Ted

Ohh... is that a Flash Gordon ray gun, or are you just ahppy...

There you go. Thank you very much, please
come again we have a lot more grocerys - Ted

There you go. Thank you very much, please come again we have...

Hey uhh, hey Ellen - yeah? - Ted

Hey uhh, hey Ellen - yeah?

There we go - Ted

Woody Harrelson Smallest dick I've ever seen on a man - Ted

Woody Harrelson Smallest dick I've ever seen on a man

Oh hey listen try this - Ted

Oh hey listen try this

Alright karim - Ted

TED Stick your finger in the loop of my tag - Ted

TED Stick your finger in the loop of my tag

You me and Lori and what's her name - Ted

You me and Lori and what's her name

Are you out here all alone - Ted

Are you out here all alone

Okay take it easy Nice Lori real nice - Ted

Okay take it easy Nice Lori real nice

What a cunt - Ted

I didn't know you had a baby Is it alive - Ted

I didn't know you had a baby Is it alive

This is Wade Boggs' autographed bat - Ted

This is Wade Boggs' autographed bat

Oh Johnny thank
christ, you made it - Ted

Oh Johnny thank christ, you made it

TED Johnny where are you You got to get over here man - Ted

TED Johnny where are you You got to get over here man

Trust me, I can do this.
Shut up - Ted

Trust me, I can do this. Shut up

Son of a bitch - Ted

Hey Johnny. I just had a great idea lets
go get drunk at cars on the overpass - Ted

Hey Johnny. I just had a great idea lets go get drunk at car...

Thanks Flash - Ted

You breaker my wall,
dis my home long time. - Ted

You breaker my wall, dis my home long time.

We are going to party like the '80s - Ted

We are going to party like the '80s

Look Johnny if we're ever going to - Ted

Look Johnny if we're ever going to

Let him go - Ted

Trust me I can do this Shut up - Ted

Trust me I can do this Shut up

Death to Ming - Ted

Hey Johnny I just had a great idea - Ted

Hey Johnny I just had a great idea

You can do any '90s song with just vowels - Ted

You can do any '90s song with just vowels

Lori, I... - Ted

Lori Lori please, I
love you, come on - Ted

Lori Lori please, I love you, come on

See There proof Garfield's eyes look like a pair of tits - Ted

See There proof Garfield's eyes look like a pair of...

Lori wait please - Ted

Lori wait please

Hey Johnny, it's me. - Ted

Hey Johnny, it's me.

Making out with that Van Wilder looking guy - Ted

Making out with that Van Wilder looking guy

Shit, ou fuck man - Ted

Shit, ou fuck man

Why you crying? - Ted

Why you crying?

You know what You're acting like a cock You know that - Ted

You know what You're acting like a cock You know that

Lori was right about you - Ted

Lori was right about you

Sometimes I think back to that Christmas morning - Ted

Sometimes I think back to that Christmas morning

SOBBING Why are you crying - Ted

SOBBING Why are you crying

You got to let me help you make things right with you and Lori - Ted

You got to let me help you make things right with you and...

You suck, get off the stage - Ted

You suck, get off the stage

Oh jesus - Ted

I love you - Ted

TED Play Chopsticks you jazzy slut - Ted

TED Play Chopsticks you jazzy slut

Michelob ultra tuscan
orange grapefruit - Ted

Michelob ultra tuscan orange grapefruit

And then you can say whatever you want - Ted

And then you can say whatever you want

So if you just give him one more chance - Ted

So if you just give him one more chance

Yeah see theres a cart - Ted

Yeah see theres a cart

I think you're being a little more fair to him - Ted

I think you're being a little more fair to him

Yeah it's kind of funny actually - Ted

Yeah it's kind of funny actually

- Hey.
- Walking home alone, huh? - Ted

- Hey. - Walking home alone, huh?

You know Ted when I was a little boy - Ted

You know Ted when I was a little boy

Me and Ted are going to be best friends Daddy - Ted

Me and Ted are going to be best friends Daddy

All right kid you win We'll do it your way - Ted

All right kid you win We'll do it your way

Ted poster

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

John Bennett, a man whose childhood wish of bringing his teddy bear to life came true, now must decide between keeping the relationship with the bear, Ted or his girlfriend, Lori.

User Rating: 0.0 (0 ratings)

Director: Seth MacFarlane

Writer: Seth MacFarlane, Alec Sulkin, Wellesley Wild

Production: Universal Pictures,MRC,Fuzzy Door Productions,Bluegrass Films,Smart Entertainment

Genre: comedy

Year: 2012

MetaScore: 62/100

ImdbRating: 6.9

BoxOffice: $218,815,487

Released: 29 Jun 2012

Awards: Nominated for 1 Oscar. 13 wins & 28 nominations total

Homepage: https://www.uphe.com/movies/ted

Ted Collection: Ted, Ted 2