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Lori: So, Tami-Lynn, why don't you... tell us a little bit about yourself, like where you're from? I'm always fascinated to meet Ted's girlfriends. Tami-Lynn: What do you mean, 'girlfriends'? [Looking
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So, Tami-Lynn, why don't you... tell us a little bit about...

Ted 2012
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So, Tami-Lynn, why don't you... tell us a little bit about yourself, like where you're from? I'm always fascinated to meet Ted's girlfriends.
What do you mean, 'girlfriends'?
[Looking at Ted]

What's it like a lot of 'em or somethin'?
N-no, that's not what she meant at all. Right, Lori? You didn't mean that.
No, what I meant to say was Ted's very handsome, so I'm always interested in meeting the ladies that can snatch him up.
Did you just call me a whore?
You just worry about your own snatch. How about that, honey?
Ted, John:
What the hell happened? We're having a friendly meal.
Yeah, this was a nice evening.
Don't talk shit to me.
I just asked you a question.
You know, you're a frickin' snob. You think you're all cool, 'cause you work at some fuckin' fancy shit place? Whatever.
Take it easy.
[Looks at Lori]

Nice, Lori. Real nice.
Me? It's not my fault she can't speak English.
[Gets up]
Oh fuck you! Just 'cause you're on the business world and shit, you think what, everybody should suck your asshole or somethin'?
[Grabs Tami-Lynn's hand to calm her down]
Okay, all right. Tami-Lynn, come on, honey. Let's get out of here. We'll go back to my place for a couple of Vodka and Strawberry Quiks, all right? Come on.
You know what? I gave birth once, bitch! I can kick your fuckin' ass! And you better never should you show your face around Quincy, you hear me? Ever!
Okay, okay, come on. Come on.
[Ted and Tami-Lynn walk out of the restaurant]

I didn't know you had a baby. Is it alive?

That's my bad.
I was sending a tweet.
John, it's almost 10:00.
I know, sir, I'm sorry.
It wasn't my fault.
What do you mean?
I guess I wasn't really prepared
for a follow-up question.
John, all you got to do
is not fuck up
and you get my job when I
go to corporate next month.
You're the new
branch manager.
All you've got to do
is not fuck up.
I realize that.
Glad to hear it.
Because in a month,
my life could be your life.
A cushy, $38,000-a-year
branch manager
who's personal friends
with Tom Skerritt.
Not a bad life, is it?
I'm going to show you something
that I don't like to show people
because I don't want them
treating me differently.
That's me and Skerritt.
Goddamn right, "Wow."
I'm gonna dock you
for dinging the car
and for showing up
late today, all right?
Try and be a little more
responsible tomorrow.
I will, sir, I promise.
I'm not going to
let you down, Goose.
Top Gun.
Tom Skerritt.
I know that.
Get out of here, okay?
Thank you, sir.
All right, here's your keys,
your rental agreement,
map of Boston.
Thank you for choosing Liberty.
Drive safely.
Thanks so much.
I heard you got busted.
Jesus, Guy, you look like shit, man.
What happened?
I don't know, I got fucking
wasted last night.
My phone says I texted someone at
3:15, asking them to beat me up.
And then, at 4:30, I texted the
same person saying, "Thanks."
And you don't remember it?
No, same as last time.
It just seems kind
of gay, doesn't it?
I don't know.
Maybe, yeah.
Well, do you think you're part
of some gay beat-up underworld?
Like one of those gay
beat-up clubs or something?
I don't know.
I dig chicks, man.
I don't remember any of it.
I was so fucked up.
I might be gay,
I don't know.
Do you mind covering
for me for a bit?
I might go lay down
in the john.
Hey, buddies.
Where is it hanging?
Hey, Alix, what's up? You
get in the club last night?
I didn't get in because
the bouncer was douche-face.
But I made friends
in the line.
That's good, I guess.
Hey, guys, anybody
know a nice restaurant,
like something
where they give out
free bubblegum
in the bathrooms?
For what?
Lori and I have been dating
four years tomorrow.
I want to take her
someplace really nice.
Aw, congratulations, John.
You guys have been
going out for four years?
My longest relationship
was like six months
and then she farted
in her sleep.
I'm like, "I'm out of here, man."
I was gone before she woke up.
You're not
very tolerant, huh?
Lori ever fart
in front of you?
Yeah, many times.
You Italian?
Never mind.
Take her to Benihana.
John, look, don't you
think after four years
maybe she's hoping for
something more than dinner?
Like what?
I don't know, but if it were me,
I'd be expecting a proposal.
Come on, nobody's expecting
anybody to propose.
I mean, marriage isn't...
Isn't love enough? I submit
that love is enough.
You can put the ring in her
ass, let her fart it out.
So bad, but so good.
Hey, by the way,
don't let me forget,

Clip duration: 205 seconds
Views: 57
Timestamp in movie: 00:00:00
Uploaded: 28 January, 2021
Genres: comedy
Summary: John Bennett, a man whose childhood wish of bringing his teddy bear to life came true, now must decide between keeping the relationship with the bear, Ted or his girlfriend, Lori.


Tami-Lynn - Jessica Barth