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Cal: You're gay now? David: No, I'm not gay. I'm just celibate. Cal: I think... I mean, that sounds gay. I just want you to know this is, like, the first conversation of, like, three conversations
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You're gay now? No, I'm not gay. I'm just celibate. I...

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Cal:
You're gay now?
David:
No, I'm not gay. I'm just celibate.
Cal:
I think... I mean, that sounds gay. I just want you to know this is, like, the first conversation of, like, three conversations that leads to you being gay. Like, there's this, and then in a year it's like, "Oh, you know, I'm kinda gonna want to get back out there, but I think I like guys," and then there's the big, "Oh, I'm... I'm... I'm a gay guy now."
David:
[smirks]
You're gay for saying that.
Cal:
I'm gay for saying that?
David:
You know how I know you're gay?
Cal:
How? How do you know I'm gay?
David:
Because you macramed yourself a pair of jean shorts.
Cal:
You know how I know *you're* gay? You just told me you're not sleeping with women any more.
David:
You know how I know you're gay?
Cal:
How? 'Cause you're gay? And you can tell who other gay people are?
David:
You know how I know you're gay?
Cal:
How?
David:
You like Coldplay.

Transcript:
(Cal)
So you're gay, now?
No, I'm not gay.
I'm just celibate.
I think...
I mean, that sounds gay.
I just want you to know
that this is the
first conversation...
of three conversations
that leads to you being gay.
There's this
and then in a year
it's like, "You know...
"I'm kind of going to wanna
get back out there,
but I think I like guys. "
And then there's the big,
"I'm a gay guy now. "
You're gay for saying that.
I'm gay for saying that?
You know how I know
you're gay?
How? How do you know I'm gay?
'Cause you macramd yourself
a pair of jean shorts.
You know how I know
you're gay?
You just told me
you're not sleeping
with women anymore.
You know how I know
you're gay?
How?
'Cause you're gay
and you can tell
who other gay people are?
Do you know how I know
you're gay?
How?
You like Coldplay.
You're dead.
[Both groaning]
Come on.
Leave my torso alone
at least.
I also wanted to call...
and see what night
you might want to go out.
I'm actually free tonight.
Okay. Now, I was thinking
maybe this weekend,
but that's good. Okay.
(Trish)
Great.
Okay, what time
do you want to pick me up?
Let's see.
That's actually
kind of a problem
because I ride a bike.
That's cool.
Are you kidding me?
I love getting on the back
of a motorcycle.
My boyfriend in college
drove a motorcycle.
So, I mean, I'm cool.
Yeah, I bet that was cool.
I ride a bicycle.
You know how I know
that you're gay?
How?
You like the movie
Maid in Manhattan.
You know how I know
you're gay?
How?
I saw you make a spinach dip
in a loaf of
sourdough bread once.
You know how I know
you're gay?
How?
You have a rainbow
bumper sticker on your car
that says:
"I love it
when balls are in my face. "
That's gay?
God damn it!
I'm ripping your head off
right now. It's off.
And now I'm throwing it
at your body.
Fuck you!
You guys...
she's picking me up
in an hour.
Oh, drag, dude.
She's picking you up
from here?
Yeah.
That's fucked up, man.
Why?
Why?
Seriously. I mean,
look at this place, man.
You gotta see this through
the eyes of a woman,
you know?
What is she going to think
when she comes in here? Look.
He's got a billion toys.
So what?
And more video games
than a teenaged Asian kid.

Clip duration: 143 seconds
Views: 58
Timestamp in movie: 01:07:46
Uploaded: 16 September, 2021
Genres: comedy, romance
Summary: Goaded by his buddies, a nerdy guy who's never "done the deed" only finds the pressure mounting when he meets a single mother.


Actors

David - Paul Rudd