I know how you feel, Miss Kubelik. You think it's the end of the world - but it's not,...

C.C. Baxter: I know how you feel, Miss Kubelik. You think it's the end of the world - but it's not, really. I went through exactly the same thing myself. Fran Kubelik: You did? C.C. Baxter: Well, maybe not exactly - I tried to do it with a gun. Fran Kubelik: Over a girl? C.C. Baxter: Worse than that - She was the wife of my best friend. And I was mad for her, but I knew it was hopeless. So I decided to end it all. I went to a pawnshop and bought a forty-five automatic and drove up to Eden Park. Do you know Cincinnati? Fran Kubelik: No, I don't. C.C. Baxter: Anyway, I parked the car and loaded the gun... Well, you read in the papers all the time that people shoot themselves, but believe me, it's not that easy. I mean, how do you do it? [cocks his finger, and points to his temple] C.C. Baxter: Here? [points to his mouth] C.C. Baxter: Or here? [points to his chest] C.C. Baxter: Or here? You know where I finally shot myself? Fran Kubelik: Where? C.C. Baxter: [indicating kneecap] Here. Fran Kubelik: In the knee? C.C. Baxter: Uh-huh. While I was sitting there, trying to make my mind up, a cop stuck his head in the car, because I was illegally parked. So I started to hide the gun under the seat and it went off - pow! Fran Kubelik: [laughing] That's terrible. C.C. Baxter: Yeah. Took me a year before I could bend my knee - but I got over the girl in three weeks. She still lives in Cincinnati, has four kids, gained twenty pounds. She sends me a fruit cake every Christmas.