Do you have those clean glasses? ...I'm sorry, are you deaf? Oh, God, your fucking breath,...
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Waitress:
Do you have those clean glasses?
Swanson:
[doesn't answer, looks her up and down]
Waitress:
...I'm sorry, are you deaf?
Swanson:
[covering his nose]
Oh, God, your fucking breath, it smells like this dirty, this, oh-I can't tell if it's the trash here, or your breath.
Waitress:
There was something I was meaning to ask you, have you tried using the dish soap to clean out your asshole?
Swanson:
Yeah, I use it all the time.
Waitress:
Because you stink.
Swanson:
[gesturing to the sink]
I actually, this is where I shower, I shower, I put my head in here...
Waitress:
Oh really, you can fit in there?
Swanson:
Yeah. Oh you know what Rodrigo was asking me about, uh, making some bread, and I guess they're out of yeast, so they were wondering if they could use, uh, some of the yeast from your vagina, 'cause I notice how infected it gets?
Waitress:
Yeah, he spoke to me about that, and I directed him to, uh, ask you about your dick cheese. See if that would maybe help.
Swanson:
Oh, wow. So good, so funny! You're so funny!
Waitress:
You are! You are!
Swanson:
I didn't realize you were so funny!
Waitress:
I didn't realize you were!
Swanson:
...you know I'm a convicted rapist, right? They told you that?
Waitress:
No.
Swanson:
Oh really, I thought they were supposed to let all the employees know about that.
Waitress:
No, they didn't tell me.
Swanson:
Yeah, I rape anything I can get my hands on. Alright?
Waitress:
Mm-hm.
Swanson:
[getting the glasses]
Are these for you?
Waitress:
Thank you.
Swanson:
Okay, great, good luck!
Waitress:
Bye, bye!
Do you have those clean glasses?
Swanson:
[doesn't answer, looks her up and down]
Waitress:
...I'm sorry, are you deaf?
Swanson:
[covering his nose]
Oh, God, your fucking breath, it smells like this dirty, this, oh-I can't tell if it's the trash here, or your breath.
Waitress:
There was something I was meaning to ask you, have you tried using the dish soap to clean out your asshole?
Swanson:
Yeah, I use it all the time.
Waitress:
Because you stink.
Swanson:
[gesturing to the sink]
I actually, this is where I shower, I shower, I put my head in here...
Waitress:
Oh really, you can fit in there?
Swanson:
Yeah. Oh you know what Rodrigo was asking me about, uh, making some bread, and I guess they're out of yeast, so they were wondering if they could use, uh, some of the yeast from your vagina, 'cause I notice how infected it gets?
Waitress:
Yeah, he spoke to me about that, and I directed him to, uh, ask you about your dick cheese. See if that would maybe help.
Swanson:
Oh, wow. So good, so funny! You're so funny!
Waitress:
You are! You are!
Swanson:
I didn't realize you were so funny!
Waitress:
I didn't realize you were!
Swanson:
...you know I'm a convicted rapist, right? They told you that?
Waitress:
No.
Swanson:
Oh really, I thought they were supposed to let all the employees know about that.
Waitress:
No, they didn't tell me.
Swanson:
Yeah, I rape anything I can get my hands on. Alright?
Waitress:
Mm-hm.
Swanson:
[getting the glasses]
Are these for you?
Waitress:
Thank you.
Swanson:
Okay, great, good luck!
Waitress:
Bye, bye!
Transcript
00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:08.834
Do you have those clean glasses
00:00:08.834 --> 00:00:14.001
I'm sorry are you deaf
00:00:14.101 --> 00:00:16.633
Oh God your fucking breath
00:00:16.634 --> 00:00:18.199
It smells like this dirty oh
00:00:18.002 --> 00:00:21.999
I can't tell if it's the trash here or your breath
00:00:21.035 --> 00:00:22.733
There was something I was meaning to ask you
00:00:22.734 --> 00:00:25.632
Have you tried using the dish soap to clean out your asshole
00:00:25.633 --> 00:00:26.532
Yeah I use it all the time Because you stink
00:00:26.533 --> 00:00:28.234
Actually this is where I shower
00:00:28.235 --> 00:00:29.866
I showe I put my head in here
00:00:29.867 --> 00:00:31.466
You can fit it in there
00:00:31.467 --> 00:00:34.567
Rodrigo was asking me about making some bread and
00:00:34.568 --> 00:00:35.631
I guess they're out of yeast
Clip duration: 37 seconds
Views: 111
Timestamp in movie: 01h 04m 30s
Uploaded: 16 November, 2022
Genres: comedy, drama
Summary: Indifferent to the notion of inheriting his father's estate, a restless, aging New Yorker passes time with his friends in games of mock sincerity and irreverence.
Comments
Actors
Waitress - Kate Lyn Sheil
Swanson - Tim Heidecker
