Now I just have to figure out how

Dudley:
[Dudley is calling his mother from Tubby's]
Mother? Dudley's Mother:
Dudley? Dudley:
Mother, I am calling you to tell you I will be out rather late tonight. In point of fact, I might not be in at all. Dudley's Mother:
[looks around]
You're not in bed, dear. Dudley:
Mother, I have a assignation with a young lady. I am going to explore the boundaries of my manhood. Mother, I am going to get laid. Dudley's Mother:
You're going to be a little late. Dudley:
Not late, mother, laid; the past participle of the verb 'to lay'. Mother, I am going to screw someone. [she faints, he hangs up] Dudley:
Now I just have to figure out how