For one dollar, I'll guess your weight, your height or your sex! The most exciting game on...

[Navin, struggling as a weight guesser at SJM Fiesta Shows] Navin R. Johnson: For one dollar, I'll guess your weight, your height or your sex! The most exciting game on the midway! Imagine the thrill of getting your weight guessed by a professional! You can blow up your cheeks, you can stick out your chest, but you're not going to fool the guesser. How 'bout you, sir? Step right up! Carnival Rube: Hey honey, let's see how good this guy is. Now what'I win? Navin R. Johnson: Ah, anything... in this general area, right in here... Anything, below the stereo, and on this side of the Bicentennial glasses... Anything between the ashtray, and the thimbles... Anything in this three inches... Right in here, this area, that includes the Chiclets, but not the erasers. Carnival Rube: No sir! C'mon honey; he thought he had himself a rube. [Navin dejectedly confides to his boss, Frosty] Navin R. Johnson: Boss, I'm just no good at this. Frosty: Ah, c'mon Navin, you're doing fine. Navin R. Johnson: I've already given away eight pencils, two hula dolls, and an ashtray, and I've only taken in fifteen dollars. Frosty: Navin, you have taken in fifteen dollars and given away fifty cents worth of crap! Which gives us a net profit of fourteen dollars and fifty cents. Navin R. Johnson: Ah... It's a profit deal! Takes the pressure off. Get your weight guessed right here! Only a buck! Actual live weight guessing! Take a chance and win some crap!

For $1, I'll guess your weight, your height, or your sex. The most exciting thing on the midway. Imagine the thrill of getting your weight guessed by a professional. You can blow up your cheeks, you can stick out your chest, but you're not going to fool the guesser. How about you, sir? Step right up. Honey, let's see how good this guy is. Now, what do I win? Uh, anything in this general area, right in here. Anything below the stereo, and on this side of the bicentennial glasses. Anything between the ashtrays and the thimble. Anything in these three inches. Right in here, in this area, that includes the Chiclets but not the erasers. No, sir. Come on, honey. He thought he had himself a rube. Frosty, I am just no good at this. Oh, come on, Navin, you're doing fine. No, I've already given away eight pencils, two hula dolls, and an ashtray, and I've only taken in $15. Navin, you have taken in $15 and given away 50 cents' worth of crap. Which gives us a net profit of $14.50. Ah! It's a profit deal. That takes the pressure off. Get your weight guessed right here. Only $1. Actual live weight guessing. Take a chance and win some crap. Step right up. Ladies and gentlemen, I draw your attention now to the left side of our midway, presenting the amazing Patty Bernstein doing her special ride through the Flaming Wall of Death. Wanna guess my weight, greenie? I saw you last night. You were great. Yeah, right. Turn around. What? Turn around.