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"The Judge" quotes

The Judge poster
Big-city lawyer Hank Palmer returns to his childhood home where his father, the town's judge, is suspected of murder. Hank sets out to discover the truth; along the way he reconnects with his estranged family.

Director: David Dobkin
Writer: Nick Schenk, Bill Dubuque, David Dobkin
Production: N/A
Genre: crime, drama
Year: 2014
MetaScore: 48/100
ImdbRating: 7.4
BoxOffice: $47,119,388
Released: 10 Oct 2014
Awards: Nominated for 1 Oscar. 3 wins & 9 nominations total

129 Clips

Hank PalmerDwight DickhamJudge Joseph PalmerMike KattanJoseph PalmerSamantha PowellDoc MorrisDale PalmerRedneckC.p. KennedyLauren PalmerJudge CarterJuror #8Glen Palmer
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And how does it feel Hank - The Judge 00:12 And how does it feel Hank So Grandpa Palmer's dead too - The Judge 00:19 So Grandpa Palmer's dead too Everybody wants Atticus Finch till there's a dead hooker in a hot tub - The Judge 00:06 Everybody wants Atticus Finch till there's a dead... How'd you turn out Henry Waiting tables A bum - The Judge 01:03 How'd you turn out Henry Waiting tables A bum Ninety percent of the country believes in ghosts - The Judge 00:30 Ninety percent of the country believes in ghosts You and I are finally done - The Judge 00:05 You and I are finally done My father's a lot of unpleasant things A murderer is not one - The Judge 00:05 My father's a lot of unpleasant things A murderer is... I don't buy it It can't be the first time someone's insulted you It's your job - The Judge 01:09 I don't buy it It can't be the first time... Where's Mary Do you think there's something else After we die - The Judge 00:17 Where's Mary Do you think there's something else... You're a shined up wooden nickel Mr Palmer - The Judge 00:32 You're a shined up wooden nickel Mr Palmer Deal Shit happens Like your marriage - The Judge 00:06 Deal Shit happens Like your marriage Damn it Hank - The Judge 00:47 Damn it Hank This isn't an act You aren't a pleasant person - The Judge 00:16 This isn't an act You aren't a pleasant person This family's a fucking Picasso painting - The Judge 00:04 This family's a fucking Picasso painting That the law is the only thing capable of making people equal - The Judge 00:06 That the law is the only thing capable of making people... Grandpa Schneider is kind of you know nice and affable - The Judge 00:13 Grandpa Schneider is kind of you know nice and affable Tell me what happened I don't remember - The Judge 00:51 Tell me what happened I don't remember Possession of a controlled substance Domestic violence That's you - The Judge 00:28 Possession of a controlled substance Domestic violence... Whatever had or hadn't happened in the past - The Judge 00:09 Whatever had or hadn't happened in the past Now what exactly is our target juror - The Judge 00:20 Now what exactly is our target juror What line were we in when they were distributing testicles - The Judge 00:06 What line were we in when they were distributing testicles Daddies don't get lonely - The Judge 00:25 Daddies don't get lonely Well yeah it's my bullshit Kindly remove your shoes from it - The Judge 00:06 Well yeah it's my bullshit Kindly remove your shoes... Imagine a faraway place Hank - The Judge 00:08 Imagine a faraway place Hank You gonna be okay at the funeral tomorrow - The Judge 00:13 You gonna be okay at the funeral tomorrow You're the little dimwit shutterbug retard - The Judge 00:11 You're the little dimwit shutterbug retard Gun Control Means Using Both Hands - The Judge 00:05 Gun Control Means Using Both Hands Is this the first time your mom passed away - The Judge 00:18 Is this the first time your mom passed away Played Hide the Pickle with someone else - The Judge 00:05 Played Hide the Pickle with someone else Deputy Hanson you were previously an officer in Detroit - The Judge 00:11 Deputy Hanson you were previously an officer in Detroit Stop staring I know I look good - The Judge 00:05 Stop staring I know I look good Tell me about Lauren Likes dislikes - The Judge 00:20 Tell me about Lauren Likes dislikes Who the fuck is Carla's dad Please Go to the courthouse - The Judge 00:13 Who the fuck is Carla's dad Please Go to the courthouse Don't pat me Don't pat me I'm the big brother here You don't pat me - The Judge 00:06 Don't pat me Don't pat me I'm the big brother... Hey judge where you going - The Judge 00:06 Hey judge where you going This family's a fucking Picasso painting - The Judge 00:04 This family's a fucking Picasso painting They shouldn't drive together - The Judge 00:04 They shouldn't drive together Oh God Where were you two when they were distributing testicles - The Judge Oh God Where were you two when they were distributing... All rise. - The Judge 00:26 All rise. And every day after that. - The Judge 00:07 And every day after that. And on the lesser included charge of voluntary manslaughter? - The Judge 00:12 And on the lesser included charge of voluntary manslaughter? Be seated. - The Judge 00:26 Be seated. Bumper stickers? Anybody got one on their car, truck, RV? - The Judge 00:15 Bumper stickers? Anybody got one on their car, truck, RV? Close your eyes. - The Judge 00:21 Close your eyes. Dad? - The Judge 00:06 Dad? Daddies don't get lonely - The Judge 00:25 Daddies don't get lonely Deal Shit happens Like your marriage - The Judge 00:06 Deal Shit happens Like your marriage Deputy Hanson you were previously an officer in Detroit - The Judge 00:11 Deputy Hanson you were previously an officer in Detroit Doesn't add up - The Judge 02:30 Doesn't add up Don't pat me. Don't pat me. I'm the big brother here. You don't pat me. - The Judge 00:13 Don't pat me. Don't pat me. I'm the big broth... Feeling lucky. - The Judge 00:12 Feeling lucky. God, what happened to your hands? - The Judge 00:09 God, what happened to your hands? Grandpa Schneider is kind of you know nice and affable - The Judge 00:13 Grandpa Schneider is kind of you know nice and affable Gun Control Means Using Both Hands - The Judge 00:05 Gun Control Means Using Both Hands Gus. - The Judge 00:24 Gus. Hey, Daddy. - The Judge 00:08 Hey, Daddy. Hey, Hank. - The Judge 00:14 Hey, Hank. Hey, judge, where you going? - The Judge 00:08 Hey, judge, where you going? Hey judge where you going - The Judge 00:08 Hey judge where you going Hey, judge. - The Judge 00:20 Hey, judge. Hmm? - The Judge 00:18 Hmm? - Holy shit. - Shut up, Joe. - The Judge 00:05 - Holy shit. - Shut up, Joe. - How about that storm, huh? - Mm. - The Judge 00:13 - How about that storm, huh? - Mm. Attention, passengers. - The Judge 00:08 Attention, passengers. Last question: This man's been your bailiff for 22 years. What is his name? - The Judge 00:06 Last question: This man's been your bailiff for 22 year... Imagine a faraway place Hank - The Judge 00:08 Imagine a faraway place Hank Is this the first time your mom passed away - The Judge 00:10 Is this the first time your mom passed away It's a coincidence. - The Judge 00:05 It's a coincidence. Judge Palmer. - The Judge 00:16 Judge Palmer. June, July, August, September, October, November, December, January... - The Judge 00:10 June, July, August, September, October, November, December, ... Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, thank you for your service. - The Judge 00:09 Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, thank you for your service... Lisa - The Judge 00:07 Lisa Lock the door behind you. - The Judge 00:15 Lock the door behind you. Mr. Palmer... - The Judge 00:28 Mr. Palmer... My memory plays tricks on me. It plays tricks on me. - The Judge 00:15 My memory plays tricks on me. It plays tricks on me. No further questions. - The Judge 00:08 No further questions. No! Unh. - The Judge 00:06 No! Unh. Now what exactly is our target juror - The Judge 00:20 Now what exactly is our target juror - Oh, Grandma. - There's me. - The Judge 00:08 - Oh, Grandma. - There's me. Old-school. - The Judge 00:06 Old-school. Possession of a controlled substance Domestic violence That's you - The Judge 00:28 Possession of a controlled substance Domestic violence... Say it again. - The Judge 00:08 Say it again. See? He's playing chess. - The Judge 00:07 See? He's playing chess. Sir, how have I mischaracterized your testimony? - The Judge 00:20 Sir, how have I mischaracterized your testimony? So Grandpa Palmer's dead too - The Judge 00:19 So Grandpa Palmer's dead too So when you see Mom, what are you supposed to say? - The Judge 00:20 So when you see Mom, what are you supposed to say? Stop staring I know I look good - The Judge 00:05 Stop staring I know I look good Tear this house down. - The Judge 00:07 Tear this house down. Tell me about Lauren. Likes, dislikes? - The Judge 00:20 Tell me about Lauren. Likes, dislikes?
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Cast

Hank Palmer - Robert Downey Jr.
Joseph Palmer - Robert Duvall
Samantha Powell - Vera Farmiga
Dwight Dickham - Billy Bob Thornton
Glen Palmer - Vincent D'Onofrio
All Cast