To watch in HD, get ClipCafe PRO
Will you teach me to footballSure we'll teach you to football Won't we CaretakerHey I'll teach you anything Just don't eat me
Please log in to add to collections.
The Longest Yard

I'll teach you anything. Just don't eat me

Switowski:
Will you teach me to football?Paul 'Wrecking' Crewe:Sure, I'll teach you to football.Caretaker:I'll teach you anything. Just don't eat me

Full Transcript

00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:02.752
Will you teach me to football
00:00:02.096 --> 00:00:05.171
Sure we'll teach you to football Won't we Caretaker
00:00:05.379 --> 00:00:07.059
Hey I'll teach you anything Just don't eat me
Available in 4 languages
Duration
9 seconds
Views
3,079
Timestamp in Movie
00:23:37
Uploaded
Mar 09, 2026
Genres
comedy, crime, sport
Production
Callahan Filmworks,Paramount Pictures,MTV Films,Columbia Pictures,Happy Madison Productions

Want This Clip in HD?

Upgrade for HD/4K downloads and unlimited access. Upgrade now →

Movie Summary

Prison inmates form a football team to challenge the prison guards.

Actors

Bob Sapp
Switowski
Bob Sapp
Chris Rock
Caretaker
Chris Rock
Adam Sandler
Paul Crewe
Adam Sandler
Down Shrek Down - The Longest Yard 00:04
Down Shrek Down
I'm gonna be your coach your captain your quarterbackYou haven't played in years Why can't I be quarterbackYou're right Let's see what you got All rightHit me I'm open Hike hike HikeThat's why Now sit down and shut up - The Longest Yard 00:15
I'm gonna be your coach your captain your...
I'm sorry I brokeded your toyNo that's a good thing You should have a victory hug with Caretaker - The Longest Yard 00:09
I'm sorry I brokeded your toyNo that's a good...
We'll work on that. - The Longest Yard 00:11
We'll work on that.
Stop the violence! - The Longest Yard 00:10
Stop the violence!
- Hey, Paul. - The Longest Yard 00:27
- Hey, Paul.
The blood of the guards is gonna flow like the rivers of ancient BabylonThat's good news Unger you're the man - The Longest Yard 00:10
The blood of the guards is gonna flow like the rivers of...
You look like you could use a little help. - The Longest Yard 00:57
You look like you could use a little help.
HAZEN: Well, now, Lindsay, this isn't about credit or congratulations. - The Longest Yard 00:18
HAZEN: Well, now, Lindsay, this isn't about credit or...
Yeah. Nice boot, skin man. Hey, why does he get to be the kicker? I was All-State, man. Let's see wh - The Longest Yard 00:50
Yeah. Nice boot, skin man. Hey, why does he get to be the...
Hey why does he get to be the kicker I was All State manLet's see what you gotThat's why you dumb ass - The Longest Yard 00:08
Hey why does he get to be the kicker I was All State...
Ain't you guys glad you got a black man for a friend? - The Longest Yard 00:07
Ain't you guys glad you got a black man for a friend?
NATE: Hazen has a rating system for every con. - The Longest Yard 00:17
NATE: Hazen has a rating system for every con.
What? Half a star? That's gotta be a mistake. Check it again. Check it again. You're about as maniac - The Longest Yard 00:40
What? Half a star? That's gotta be a mistake. Check it...
Why don't we have a maniacal pillow fight tonightThat could get it up someYeah We can sell it to pay per viewSuperstar Versus Half a Star - The Longest Yard 00:11
Why don't we have a maniacal pillow fight tonightThat...
- What's he doing that for? - The Longest Yard 00:11
- What's he doing that for?
People have told me that you and I look a lot alikeso I wanted to see for myselfBELLOWSI'm gonna take a piss - The Longest Yard 00:11
People have told me that you and I look a lot alikeso I...
Damn! Brucie. Brucie. You all right? You breathing? I got a bird. His name is Ronnie. Well, tell Ron - The Longest Yard 00:14
Damn! Brucie. Brucie. You all right? You breathing? I got a...
I got a bird His name is RonnieWell tell Ronnie you got knocked the fuck out - The Longest Yard 00:08
I got a bird His name is RonnieWell tell Ronnie you got...
Wow, no bullshit. - The Longest Yard 00:30
Wow, no bullshit.