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The Mortuary Collection

An eccentric mortician recounts several macabre and phantasmagorical tales that he's encountered in his distinguished career.

Director

Ryan Spindell

Year

Genre

fantasy, horror

Box Office

N/A

Production

Trapdoor Pictures,Mountain Path Entertainment,Alliance Media Partners

Awards

14 wins & 16 nominations

Homepage

http://www.trapdoorpictures.com/the-mortuary-collection-main

Cast information not available.

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Explore 319 Clips

[Chuckles] - The Mortuary Collection

A single narrative thread
in the tapestry - The Mortuary Collection

A single narrative thread in the tapestry

And as with all stories, - The Mortuary Collection

And as with all stories,

I beseech you, friends,
that even as we mourn, - The Mortuary Collection

I beseech you, friends, that even as we mourn,

Let us seek solace that
we have been granted impunity - The Mortuary Collection

Let us seek solace that we have been granted impunity

That death would not
eradicate us, - The Mortuary Collection

That death would not eradicate us,

Uh, and now a reading
from Corinthians. - The Mortuary Collection

Uh, and now a reading from Corinthians.

Please drive safely. - The Mortuary Collection

Please drive safely.

[Coffin creaking]I wouldn't. - The Mortuary Collection

[Coffin creaking]I wouldn't.

This world,
this business, - The Mortuary Collection

This world, this business,

The coffin --
It's so small. - The Mortuary Collection

The coffin -- It's so small.

Montgomery Dark,
resident mortician, - The Mortuary Collection

Montgomery Dark, resident mortician,

It's a family name. - The Mortuary Collection

It's a family name.

Oh, I'm Sam. - The Mortuary Collection

Oh, no. I'm sorry.
I saw a sign out front. - The Mortuary Collection

Oh, no. I'm sorry. I saw a sign out front.

Yeah, "Help wanted." - The Mortuary Collection

Yeah, "Help wanted."

No, but I'm
a fast learner. - The Mortuary Collection

No, but I'm a fast learner.

Mm, most people would
find it unmanageable. - The Mortuary Collection

Mm, most people would find it unmanageable.

Please have a seat. - The Mortuary Collection

Please have a seat.

This is -- This is
one serious collection of books - The Mortuary Collection

This is -- This is one serious collection of books

The mere tip
of the looming, - The Mortuary Collection

The mere tip of the looming,

So, these are all stories
about how people died? - The Mortuary Collection

So, these are all stories about how people died?

Not just how,
my dear, why. - The Mortuary Collection

Not just how, my dear, why.

[Chuckles] - The Mortuary Collection

Tell you one what?A story. - The Mortuary Collection

Tell you one what?A story.

Something...
dark and twisted. - The Mortuary Collection

Something... dark and twisted.

Mm. Perhaps we should
stick to business. - The Mortuary Collection

Mm. Perhaps we should stick to business.

Oh, come on, Monty.
If I'm going to be working here, - The Mortuary Collection

Oh, come on, Monty. If I'm going to be working here,

You are not hired yet,
young lady. - The Mortuary Collection

You are not hired yet, young lady.

Right because you have
a stack of applications - The Mortuary Collection

Right because you have a stack of applications

Meet me
on the veranda in 10? - The Mortuary Collection

Meet me on the veranda in 10?

Look, I've just got to say that
talking with you back there, - The Mortuary Collection

Look, I've just got to say that talking with you back t...

I'm being crazy.
I'll see you on the veranda. - The Mortuary Collection

I'm being crazy. I'll see you on the veranda.

[Sighs] - The Mortuary Collection

[Toilet flushes] - The Mortuary Collection

[Toilet flushes]

Ahh!
[Inhales sharply] - The Mortuary Collection

Ahh! [Inhales sharply]

[Creature trilling] - The Mortuary Collection

[Creature trilling]

[People murmuring casually] - The Mortuary Collection

[People murmuring casually]

[Distant creature trill] - The Mortuary Collection

[Distant creature trill]

[Ticking stops][Creature growling] - The Mortuary Collection

[Ticking stops][Creature growling]

I was expecting something
a bit more substantial. - The Mortuary Collection

I was expecting something a bit more substantial.

Maybe an ironic comeuppance
or a big twist, but... - The Mortuary Collection

Maybe an ironic comeuppance or a big twist, but...

I was...
just warming up. - The Mortuary Collection

I was... just warming up.

Sign here,
initial here and here. - The Mortuary Collection

Sign here, initial here and here.

It's a bit far-fetched,
don't you think, - The Mortuary Collection

It's a bit far-fetched, don't you think,

And [breathes deeply] - The Mortuary Collection

And [breathes deeply]

Don't stick you nose
where it doesn't belong? - The Mortuary Collection

Don't stick you nose where it doesn't belong?

In a most
basic sense, yes. - The Mortuary Collection

In a most basic sense, yes.

But on a deeper level, - The Mortuary Collection

But on a deeper level,

These are morticians,
my dear, - The Mortuary Collection

These are morticians, my dear,

A distinguished group,
to be sure. - The Mortuary Collection

A distinguished group, to be sure.

[Chuckles]
Yeah, distinguished. - The Mortuary Collection

[Chuckles] Yeah, distinguished.

Come.
There's much to see. - The Mortuary Collection

Come. There's much to see.

The mourning sit here - The Mortuary Collection

The mourning sit here

Ironic, is it not,
that one so old would preside - The Mortuary Collection

Ironic, is it not, that one so old would preside

So, what is
the story here? - The Mortuary Collection

So, what is the story here?

[Coffin creaks] - The Mortuary Collection

[Coffin creaks]

Some tales even I find
too unsettling to recount. - The Mortuary Collection

Some tales even I find too unsettling to recount.

Tell me
another one, then. - The Mortuary Collection

Tell me another one, then.

Well, this young man
had to learn it the hard way. - The Mortuary Collection

Well, this young man had to learn it the hard way.

Now, ladies,
as a straight, white male, - The Mortuary Collection

Now, ladies, as a straight, white male,

The patriarchy is falling,
and in its place - The Mortuary Collection

The patriarchy is falling, and in its place

A world where both men and women
are entitled to have sex - The Mortuary Collection

A world where both men and women are entitled to have sex

[Women giggling] - The Mortuary Collection

[Women giggling]

Guys, listen --
We are having a party tonight - The Mortuary Collection

Guys, listen -- We are having a party tonight

So...is that true
about the patriarchy? - The Mortuary Collection

So...is that true about the patriarchy?

No, idiot.
Patriarchy is solid. - The Mortuary Collection

No, idiot. Patriarchy is solid.

Karl Marx said that -- - The Mortuary Collection

Karl Marx said that --

We are providing an important
service to the incoming freshmen - The Mortuary Collection

We are providing an important service to the incoming freshm...

Guys, it is our job to help them
make informed decisions. - The Mortuary Collection

Guys, it is our job to help them make informed decisions.

[Chuckles] A-And what, the girls
who take the condoms - The Mortuary Collection

[Chuckles] A-And what, the girls who take the condoms

And party means sex. - The Mortuary Collection

And party means sex.

Oh, Miss.
Hey! Can I -- - The Mortuary Collection

Oh, Miss. Hey! Can I --

We're giving them away to show
how the patriarchy is dying. - The Mortuary Collection

We're giving them away to show how the patriarchy is dy...

You know,
it's almost dead. - The Mortuary Collection

You know, it's almost dead.

I mean,
we're white guys and -- - The Mortuary Collection

I mean, we're white guys and --

Uh, just one
'cause we've got plenty, - The Mortuary Collection

Uh, just one 'cause we've got plenty,

So, um, the girls lacrosse team
just showed up at the booth, - The Mortuary Collection

So, um, the girls lacrosse team just showed up at the booth,

That's like the fastest sport
on two feet. [Chuckles] - The Mortuary Collection

That's like the fastest sport on two feet. [Chuckles]

Uh, yeah, we don't have
a girls lacrosse team. - The Mortuary Collection

Uh, yeah, we don't have a girls lacrosse team.

You don't look like
a freshman. - The Mortuary Collection

You don't look like a freshman.

What?
I w-- - The Mortuary Collection

I-I'm working at
the stay safe booth over there. - The Mortuary Collection

I-I'm working at the stay safe booth over there.

I-I'm just trying
to give back. - The Mortuary Collection

I-I'm just trying to give back.

I like that. - The Mortuary Collection

I got to go, but,
um, yeah. - The Mortuary Collection

I got to go, but, um, yeah.

You know, um...
there's a party tonight - The Mortuary Collection

You know, um... there's a party tonight

Uh, it's probably going to be
fun, so you should come. - The Mortuary Collection

Uh, it's probably going to be fun, so you should come.

Yeah. Maybe. - The Mortuary Collection

Okay, well, uh, maybe
I'll see you there. - The Mortuary Collection

Okay, well, uh, maybe I'll see you there.

The Mortuary Collection poster

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

An eccentric mortician recounts several macabre and phantasmagorical tales that he's encountered in his distinguished career.

User Rating: 0.0 (0 ratings)

Director: Ryan Spindell

Writer: Ryan Spindell

Production: Trapdoor Pictures,Mountain Path Entertainment,Alliance Media Partners

Genre: fantasy, horror

Year: 2020

MetaScore: 69/100

ImdbRating: 6.4

BoxOffice: N/A

Released: 15 Oct 2020

Awards: 14 wins & 16 nominations

Homepage: http://www.trapdoorpictures.com/the-mortuary-collection-main