What? What do you say to a man who's crying in your bathroom?
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Murray:
What are you, crazy, letting him go to the john alone? Roy:
Suppose he tries to kill himself! Oscar Madison:
How's he gonna kill himself in the john? Murray:
Whaddaya mean, how? Razor blades, poison, anything that's in there. Oscar Madison:
Nah, that's the kids' bathroom. The worst he could do in there is brush his teeth to death. Roy:
He could jump! Vinnie:
That's right! Isn't there a window in there? Oscar Madison:
Yeah, but it's only six inches wide. Murray:
Yeah, well he could break the glass - he could cut his wrists! Oscar Madison:
He could also flush himself into the East River. I'm telling you he's not going to try anything. Roy:
Sh! Sh! Listen, listen! [they all follow Roy to the bathroom door; Felix is heard crying] Roy:
He's crying. You hear that, he's crying! Murray:
Isn't that terrible? For God's sakes, Oscar, do something, say something! Oscar Madison:
What? What do you say to a man who's crying in your bathroom?
What are you, crazy, letting him go to the john alone? Roy:
Suppose he tries to kill himself! Oscar Madison:
How's he gonna kill himself in the john? Murray:
Whaddaya mean, how? Razor blades, poison, anything that's in there. Oscar Madison:
Nah, that's the kids' bathroom. The worst he could do in there is brush his teeth to death. Roy:
He could jump! Vinnie:
That's right! Isn't there a window in there? Oscar Madison:
Yeah, but it's only six inches wide. Murray:
Yeah, well he could break the glass - he could cut his wrists! Oscar Madison:
He could also flush himself into the East River. I'm telling you he's not going to try anything. Roy:
Sh! Sh! Listen, listen! [they all follow Roy to the bathroom door; Felix is heard crying] Roy:
He's crying. You hear that, he's crying! Murray:
Isn't that terrible? For God's sakes, Oscar, do something, say something! Oscar Madison:
What? What do you say to a man who's crying in your bathroom?
Full Transcript
00:00:01.000 --> 00:00:03.025
Are you crazy letting him go to the john alone
00:00:03.102 --> 00:00:04.569
Suppose he tries to kill himself
00:00:04.637 --> 00:00:06.764
How can he kill himself in the john
00:00:06.839 --> 00:00:08.999
Razor blades poison
00:00:08.107 --> 00:00:09.438
That's the kids' bathroom
00:00:09.508 --> 00:00:10.941
Maybe he could brush his teeth to death
00:00:11.998 --> 00:00:12.307
He could jump
00:00:12.378 --> 00:00:13.064
Isn't there a window
00:00:13.713 --> 00:00:15.237
It's only 6 inches wide
00:00:15.314 --> 00:00:16.941
He could break it and cut his wrists
00:00:17.998 --> 00:00:19.999
He could flush himself into the East River
00:00:19.151 --> 00:00:20.914
He's not going to try anything
00:00:20.987 --> 00:00:23.319
Listen Listen
00:00:29.999 --> 00:00:30.001
He's crying
00:00:31.053 --> 00:00:33.464
You hear that He's crying
00:00:35.968 --> 00:00:38.937
Isn't that terrible For God's sakes Oscar say something
00:00:39.026 --> 00:00:42.168
What do you say to a man who's crying in your bathroom
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Movie Summary
A New Yorker newly separated from his wife moves in with his best friend, a divorced sportswriter, but their ideas of housekeeping and lifestyles are as different as night and day.
