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"The Spy Next Door" quotes

The Spy Next Door poster
Former C.I.A. spy Bob Ho takes on his toughest assignment to date: looking after his girlfriend's three kids, who haven't exactly warmed to their mom's beau.

Director: Brian Levant
Writer: Jonathan Bernstein, James Greer, Gregory Poirier
Production: N/A
Year: 2010
MetaScore: 27/100
ImdbRating: 5.4
BoxOffice: $24,307,086
Released: 15 Jan 2010
Awards: 2 nominations
Yuri. - The Spy Next Door 00:11 Yuri. - You're full of it.
- Yeah, full of it. - The Spy Next Door 00:12 - You're full of it. - Yeah, full of it. - You'll be safe. I promise.
- Stay away from my children. - The Spy Next Door 00:06 - You'll be safe. I promise. - Stay away from my childr... You trying to pop our ears?
That's nothing but a bunch of static. - The Spy Next Door 00:28 You trying to pop our ears? That's nothing but a bunch ... - You speak Russian, Larry?
- What's going on? - The Spy Next Door 00:06 - You speak Russian, Larry? - What's going on? Yo, it's Ho. - The Spy Next Door 00:08 Yo, it's Ho. - Yes.
- Hey, partner. Where're you at? - The Spy Next Door 00:30 - Yes. - Hey, partner. Where're you at? Yay, Bob! - The Spy Next Door 00:09 Yay, Bob! - Why did you pull us out of school?
- Who cares? We're out. - The Spy Next Door 00:19 - Why did you pull us out of school? - Who cares? We're... - Where is he?
- Hiding. - The Spy Next Door 00:09 - Where is he? - Hiding. - What's the story here?
- They hit Poldark's prison transport caravan - The Spy Next Door 00:21 - What's the story here? - They hit Poldark's pris... - What's your major, Larry?
- English Lit. - The Spy Next Door 00:12 - What's your major, Larry? - English Lit. What happened to the bacteria? - The Spy Next Door 00:09 What happened to the bacteria? What are you doing? - The Spy Next Door 00:14 What are you doing? We're here. There is nobody around. - The Spy Next Door 00:19 We're here. There is nobody around. - We'll be safe here. I promise.
- This is your plan? Hide out in a hotel? - The Spy Next Door 00:11 - We'll be safe here. I promise. - This is your plan? H... This one I learned it in China
when I was young. - The Spy Next Door 00:05 This one I learned it in China when I was young. - This is going to be painful.
- You're right about that. - The Spy Next Door 00:11 - This is going to be painful. - You're right about tha... - This is going to be fun.
- Hey, Larry. Knock, knock. - The Spy Next Door 00:09 - This is going to be fun. - Hey, Larry. Knock, knock. This is awesome.
Can we order room service? - The Spy Next Door 00:21 This is awesome. Can we order room service? Tell me the truth. Are you really a spy? - The Spy Next Door 00:19 Tell me the truth. Are you really a spy? Sorry, mister. - The Spy Next Door 00:07 Sorry, mister. So, tell me more about Halloween. - The Spy Next Door 00:28 So, tell me more about Halloween. So, you got any other cool spy stuff,
besides the watch? - The Spy Next Door 00:07 So, you got any other cool spy stuff, besides the watch? - Shotgun.
- It's not your day. - The Spy Next Door 00:10 - Shotgun. - It's not your day. She must have plastic in her shoes.
It will eat any petroleum product. - The Spy Next Door 00:11 She must have plastic in her shoes. It will eat any petroleu... Puzzle encryption.
Let's see what you've got. - The Spy Next Door 00:05 Puzzle encryption. Let's see what you've got. - Princess.
- It's too big. - The Spy Next Door 00:09 - Princess. - It's too big. Please don't go away.
Who's gonna sing me China songs? - The Spy Next Door 00:07 Please don't go away. Who's gonna sing me China so... Okay, princess. - The Spy Next Door 00:29 Okay, princess. Okay, maybe just this once. Let's go. - The Spy Next Door 00:06 Okay, maybe just this once. Let's go. Nora. - The Spy Next Door 00:07 Nora. Nora. Please don't wander off again. - The Spy Next Door 00:11 Nora. Please don't wander off again. Nora, let's get ready for bed. - The Spy Next Door 00:08 Nora, let's get ready for bed. No, that man's so crooked,
he could eat nails and... - The Spy Next Door 00:19 No, that man's so crooked, he could eat nails and... Night-night. - The Spy Next Door 00:13 Night-night. My happiness counts, too. - The Spy Next Door 00:13 My happiness counts, too. Mom, lan's feeding Jethro bacon. - The Spy Next Door 00:08 Mom, lan's feeding Jethro bacon. Mind if I chill with you? - The Spy Next Door 00:07 Mind if I chill with you? Listen, about today... - The Spy Next Door 00:17 Listen, about today... Let go! - The Spy Next Door 00:12 Let go! Lan. You know the rules. - The Spy Next Door 00:09 Lan. You know the rules. It doesn't look like
they have chicken tenders here. - The Spy Next Door 00:09 It doesn't look like they have chicken tenders here. Irish stew in the name of the law. - The Spy Next Door 00:19 Irish stew in the name of the law. I'm sorry I put you through all this. - The Spy Next Door 00:23 I'm sorry I put you through all this. I had to make up
one heck of a yarn to get all this stuff. - The Spy Next Door 00:23 I had to make up one heck of a yarn to get all this stuff. I saw them outside. They're coming. - The Spy Next Door 00:32 I saw them outside. They're coming. I have to go. - The Spy Next Door 00:17 I have to go. I got it. - The Spy Next Door 00:07 I got it. - I forgot Chuckle.
- Nora! Nora! - The Spy Next Door 00:13 - I forgot Chuckle. - Nora! Nora! I finally found a normal guy, I thought,
someone who likes to... - The Spy Next Door 00:10 I finally found a normal guy, I thought, someone who likes t... I don't know who you are sending out
to buy my clothes, but I want them killed. - The Spy Next Door 00:25 I don't know who you are sending out to buy my clothes,... I can't believe you did this to my family,
endangered my kids. - The Spy Next Door 00:19 I can't believe you did this to my family, endangered m... Hurry up. I don't have all day.
There is no overtime here. - The Spy Next Door 00:06 Hurry up. I don't have all day. There is no overtime he... Hurry. Close it. Close it quick. Okay. - The Spy Next Door 00:05 Hurry. Close it. Close it quick. Okay. How the heck are you going to get in there?
A jet pack? - The Spy Next Door 00:07 How the heck are you going to get in there? A jet pack? How quickly can you give me
orange jumpsuit? - The Spy Next Door 00:16 How quickly can you give me orange jumpsuit? How humiliating.
Why didn't you do something? - The Spy Next Door 00:13 How humiliating. Why didn't you do something? Ho's signal just popped back up.
We got him. - The Spy Next Door 00:09 Ho's signal just popped back up. We got him. Hi, Gillian. - The Spy Next Door 00:32 Hi, Gillian. Hey, loosen these things up. - The Spy Next Door 00:31 Hey, loosen these things up. Hey, guys. - The Spy Next Door 00:11 Hey, guys. - Hello.
- You must stop shooting things, Antosha. - The Spy Next Door 00:18 - Hello. - You must stop shooting things, Antosha. Have a great day. - The Spy Next Door 00:10 Have a great day. - Happy Halloween.
- Bob! - The Spy Next Door 00:26 - Happy Halloween. - Bob! Good work. - The Spy Next Door 00:31 Good work. Good news. We got an address. - The Spy Next Door 00:24 Good news. We got an address. Go. Go! - The Spy Next Door 00:09 Go. Go! Go, Bob, go! Go, Bob, go! Go, Bob, go! - The Spy Next Door 00:14 Go, Bob, go! Go, Bob, go! Go, Bob, go! Give me the iPod, kid. - The Spy Next Door 00:12 Give me the iPod, kid. Gillian, wait. Don't hang up. - The Spy Next Door 00:11 Gillian, wait. Don't hang up. Gillian, I'm really sorry about everything. - The Spy Next Door 00:06 Gillian, I'm really sorry about everything. Farren, let's go. - The Spy Next Door 00:23 Farren, let's go. Everything will be fine. Oatmeal's ready. - The Spy Next Door 00:05 Everything will be fine. Oatmeal's ready. Don't touch. It's very sharp. - The Spy Next Door 00:08 Don't touch. It's very sharp. Don't think this changes anything. - The Spy Next Door 00:18 Don't think this changes anything. Dear Mom, I am very sorry,
but I cannot stay here. - The Spy Next Door 00:19 Dear Mom, I am very sorry, but I cannot stay here. Come on, kids, time for bed. - The Spy Next Door 00:08 Come on, kids, time for bed. Come on, guys, get in the room
and lock the door. Hurry. Lock it. - The Spy Next Door 00:05 Come on, guys, get in the room and lock the door. Hurry. Loc...

Cast

Bob Ho - Jackie Chan
Gillian - Amber Valletta